Should a B2B have to clean up after her own bachelorette party while the other guests just chill?

Question

My wife went to her friend "Jane's" bachelorette party last night. It was held at Jane's house. Wife and another friend cooked a TON of food, bought some Jane's favorite snacks, then everyone sat around and ate.

Afterward they all took a train downtown and went partying.

When they got back to Jane's house, it was about 3 a.m. and the kitchen was a complete mess from the dinner and the party activities.

Everyone was tired and sitting around eating and talking, so wife started cleaning up. Then Jane got up and began helping her by throwing away trash and washing all the dishes which took like 30 mins because there were so many.

The rest of the guests continued to sit around leisurely saying they'd clean up in the morning.

Isn't that kind of crummy to not only make the bachelorette clean up, but for some of the guests (excluding my wife and the other one who cooked) to sit and do nothing? Or is that the norm?

Answer 1

This is tricky, because the host of the party (your wife and friend?) were not the owners of the house. Usually, its not a good idea for the host to start cleaning up in front of guests because it makes guests uncomfortable and make them think its time to leave. However I can understand wanting to see a clean kitchen the morning after a long night, and the other girls were obviously not moved by this.

In my own home, I prefer to do the cleaning up. Im a little anal about things, and I like it done my way so its easier if I do it myself.

I think in this case, everyone should have helped sorting the trash and putting things in order, while one or two people washed the dishes. Oh well. Its not the end of the world.

Answer 2

NO, that's not the norm. How rude! They should have got off their duffs and cleaned! I'm one of those people that I can't stand to go to bed knowing I will wake up to dirty dishes. So I probably would have cleaned my own kitchen too. But I would've been mad about it in my mind.

You're wife did the right thing and obviously showed what kind of caring friend she is. Some people just don't get it and are down to party and eat and dirty up someone else's home but have no manners when it comes to taking advantage of a friend. Sheesh!  

Answer 3

I think that's a good reason to have the party at someone else's house if you decide not to go out for dinner for whatever reason. Then the B2B can be taken to her home at the end of the night and not have to worry.

Sorry your B2B had to clean up after her own party. In my circle the "girls" would have physically sat her down and told her to perish the thought of cleaning her own party and made sure she had a clean house to wake up to, but we're nice girls from the Midwest, USA and would be able to picture our mothers smacking us and saying, "What are you sitting around for? Get off your lazy butt and help!"

Answer 4

Your right, that is crummy of the other guest to sit around and do nothing.  They knew once the others started cleaning, they wouldn't have to do anything in the morning.  The bride to be was the one who should have done nothing, after all, it was in her honor.  Granted it was at her house, but the others should have pitched in.  I'm sure all of them were tired at time of the morning but when they saw your wife and the bride to be cleaning, they should have got off their you know whats, and offered to clean and told the bride to relax.  How lazy and selfish of them.  Did the others do any cooking or did they just enjoy the efforts of those who did all the cooking?