Should a parent who was not in the picture get to see his son after 10 years? ?

Question

He hasn't paid his child suport. He also made them go thur dna testing. and now he is wanting to see his son. but his son who is 10 doesn't want to see him.

Answer 1

Why doesn't his son want to see him? Because of what you have told him?

This man sounds like he may have had some sort of change in his life. I suggest you stop putting your own hurt first, and do what is best for your son. There is no harm in letting them meet while you or another family member are present. Then go after the back child support. Your son deserves that.  

Answer 2

Visitation and child support are two separate issues.

Let him see the child and attend counseling with the child, so that the child has the opportunity to get to know his father.

If the child grows up with resentment, let it be from establishing his own opinions and not from what he has learned second-hand.

When the father comes back around, get his information and take him to court for the back support. Give his information to the local child support enforcement agency so that they can garnish his wages for back-support.

BTW: Do not let him take the child any place without a third party present until you feel safe enough to know that he will not run off with him.

Best wishes

Answer 3

take him to court and make him pay all the missed child support, that is the first thing to do. Second, find out why now, after all these years he wants to see the child he abandoned. Tell him that the boy doesn't want to see him, and it's primarily up to him. Maybe the dad could start slow like with letters or something.

Answer 4

every parent has a right to see or b involved in their childs life..

it doesnt matter if they pay child support or not..

if the child doesnt want to see the father then you need to find out what the age is in your state where the child can talk to a judge and express what he wants...if the child is not old enough then the father can get visitation rights..

if the father does get visitation just offer to meet in a public place and take things slow to get them familiar with one another...

take the father to court for child support to help with providing for his child..

Answer 5

its up to the boy if hes ready to see him u cant make him if his not ready. give him sometime to think about it.

Answer 6

Definately up to your son =)

Answer 7

maybe they should try counseling after they meet  

Answer 8

that's a tough one. First off i think that child support is very important but should never be used as a weapon in a relationship between parent and child. I dont care how in debt they are, thats not the childs fault and punishing the parent in that manner is also punishing the child. Now, in your case, If the parent is willing to commit and change to the CHILD not you!!!!!, providing there is no past abuse of any kind I would hope that a new bond between father and son would be encourraged. None of us were born perfect and all of us make major mistakes, so all of us should also be willing to forgive.

Answer 9

I would say that he has the right to see him since he is the kid's father, but if the child doesn't have any interest in seeing/meeting him, then you don't need to feel bad about it.

If your son changes his mind one day, and decides he wants to meet him, you should let him, no matter how much of a scum bag the guy is, because then your son could see for himself what kind of person he may or may not be, and decide for himself.

Answer 10

It is up to the kid. If he doesn't want to see his dad, then he shouldn't have to. He's old enough to decide for himself. But he shouldn't be punished for his dad's failings if he DOES want to see him. You can never go wrong by making it all about the kid!

That said, if you and your son go with "no," you best get with an attorney and make sure you keep pops away.

Good luck!

Answer 11

Has he excepted his responsibilities if so tell son and let him know you all have issues that he needs to at least meet his dad or later he might regret it this is a hard decision for young let him know to just befriend him not love not trust the are privileges not rights.

Answer 12

he should be a man and respect the childs wishes