Should an abortion ruin a marriage? help.?

Question

Should love between the spouses come first than anything?

Not because you don't want a child with them but because your husband forced you to.

not exactly force you but you know.

when you weren't ready.

\Wife or husband wasn't ready for the baby, then what?

would you work it out or just leave?

both partners.

an abortion shouldn't break a marriage. You got married to the persno because you love them no matter what, right?

if it breaks, there was never anything.

but you should inform the other person your feelings

I believe.

What do you believe?

Answer 1

I believe in Abortion, BUT i also believe that when your married a decision like having an abortion is not one you make by yourself. You both had unprotected s*x now you both have to figure out what to do. You dont get to decide what he wants to do without discussing this with him. Thats like him cheating on you and saying "well i didnt think you would mind soo i did it". Your not single your not alone, You cannot make someones mind up for them. Your married. If you didnt want to have a baby then you should protect yourself for next time.

Answer 2

Why would you let someone force you, or talk you into having an abortion? You will end up resenting him for this, and that will probably break up your marriage. I recommend doubling up on the birth control.

You do marry a person because of love. However, love doesn't always conquer all. I'm living proof of that. You have a lot to learn.

Answer 3

once again, im with valerie on this one. yes, an abortion very well could end a marriage

Answer 4

Didn't I just answer this?

What did you do?  Delete it because we all told you abortion was wrong?

WTF?

Don't ask, if you only want to hear what YOU want to hear.

Like i already said, abortion is MURDER.

Answer 5

statistics show that couples who have abortions are less likely to stay together... one of my good friends and his fiance had an abortion when they were in their early 20s and not ready for a baby - they are of the few who are still as strong as day one... i know that in my relationship, if i got pg and decided on an abortion, my man would drop me like a hot rock... he would drive me to the clinic, fight with me the whole way over not to do it, then, if i decided to get out, i would have to find my opwn ride home.. i know  because its happened in his past! and i believe it takes 2 to have s*x and make a baby, and those of us who arent ready for the concequences of what could happen, shouldnt be having s*x at all...

i tend to believe stats

Answer 6

Some one kills your unborn son or daughter and has a "so what, it's no different than stepping on a **** roach" attitude about it, why would YOU WANT to remain married to someone so selfish,self centered and cold hearted?If they could do something like that to an unborn baby,their OWN FLESH AND BLOOD,I shudder to think of what they could do to their own spouse.

If you didn't WANT kids, YOU,YES YOU could have had your tubes tied,made him use a condom and you get on the pill.Do not blame HIM for YOUR irresponsibility hon.YOU have power over YOUR OWN body.

Anyone who would ask his wife to murder her their own unborn son or daughter,is heartless and loves no one but theirself.

Next, unless he held you at gun point or overpowered you physically and raped you until you were pregnant, he did NOT in ANY WAY "FORCE" you to have a kid.

Answer 7

Girl if you guys are both not ready for a baby then have the abortion soon as you can cus the sooner the better....Try getting the abortion befor 3 months cus my sister inlaw who i cant stand waited for a while and she was already 3 months pregnant and they told her it was going to be a boy and she still went along with the abortion so the sooner the better......You guys are young you can work things out just like me and my husband do i am 20 and he is 22.....So you guys just talk some of the people on this stupid thing are stupid most of them dont help at all on our questions.....Take Care!

Answer 8

I'm not married and I can't have kids.  But, hypothetically, if I was married, got pregnant and my spouse tried to force me to have an abortion, I would leave.  It would end the marriage.

I do agree that it's the act of going behind your partner's back, either to get an abortion without their knowledge or to get pregnant without their knowledge, that is wrong.

If you didn't want kids, you should have used birth control.  If you were having unprotected s*x, EVEN WITH YOUR SPOUSE, and you got pregnant, you should have expected it!

It's every woman's right to choose how they stand on this issue.  Personally, I think it's wrong.  However, that is between you and God.  Good luck with that.

Answer 9

abortion is murder. It's a sin. And it's just the same as going up to a random person off the street and stabbing them (and they die of course) =[[

Answer 10

I don't agree with abortion unless there is something life threatening with the baby.  For any other reason it is out of pure selfishness.

Answer 11

It depends on the individual views on abortion. If one of the partners deems abortion unacceptable, obviously it's going to ruin the marriage if the other partner doesn't respect this view. Generally speaking, disrespect and disregard for each other WILL ruin a marriage, no matter what the subject matter is. I agree that you shouldn't have a baby until both partners are ready - but it is a responsibility of both partners to take sensible steps to prevent unwanted pregnancy; thankfully, in the 21st century there are plenty of birth control options to choose from - abortions, except for medical reasons, should really be becoming obsolete simply because the birth control options are so abundant and easily accessible. Whenever people are careless and irresponsible, it WILL have an impact on them and their relationships - again, it doesn't have to do anything to do with abortion. You can't just do whatever the heck you want and then say - "love should triumph all". Love doesn't grow in a vacuum - it is based on mutual trust, respect and support for each other; when you are careless with the other person's feelings, when you are disrespectful or irresponsible - yes, absolutely it will affect love, and it will affect your relationship. Love is not a free pass to selfishly do whatever is convenient to you alone.

Answer 12

If you weren't ready for a baby then why were you fuking?

I believe that when you act like animals and think with you loins, then this is the kind of shite that happens.

By the way, your marraige will fail because of this.

Answer 13

After an abortion the marriage is never the same. If you have ever had an abortion, you would  know what i mean... you will regret and live w/ this forever, i promise u that... I've been where u are, and i wish i could take it back...

~A

Answer 14

I believe if your husband (I use the term loosely) is pushing you to have an abortion because " he's not ready" he's not worthy to be your husband.

If my wife was pregnant and evan suggested an abortion it would be an irreconcilable difference.

Answer 15

yes an abortion can ruin a marriage...if you are married and committed murder and did not  care what spouse thought...you are doomed.

Answer 16

Your conscious, of how abortion has taken a life, may or not effect your relationship. Don't hide your feelings of how you feel of the abortion. Do you feel you have made a mistake? Then say it, honesty is where a relationship begins.

Answer 17

I am 100% positive you will get a huge amount of replies on this from pro-abortion folks and folks that believe it shouldn't happen.

But I am not going to give ya my opinion on that subject I am going to give an opinion of what breaks a marriage.

Anytime two people get married there is a huge amount of compromises....1st off you should of chatted about if you both wanted children or not BEFORE you got married. But as they say it is water under the bridge at this point.

The subject isn't it all that makes a break a marriage. It is how you handled the problem w/o knowledge of your hubby. Because I personally believe you should of protected yourself if you were the one that didn't want children. That was solely the responsibility of the person not wanting children. If the spouse that wanted children knew you made a choice behind their back to do as you wanted , without consulting him that alone is a major deal breaker.

That is the part I feel is a major deal breaker. Marriage takes two folks working together on everything w/o it it will fail. Going behind someones back no matter what it is about will no doubt ruin a marriage.

Answer 18

I really don't get your question.  It is so broken up, it hardly makes sense.

Answer 19

An abortion is always a touchy subject and the relationship must be extra strong to be able to work through it.  I have friends who have had abortions and their relationships did not survive.

I don't know anyone that ever regretted having a baby.

Marriage is about compromising.  You're expecting him to just bend for you?  Goes both ways.

You're lucky because you hold all the power here - it's your choice.  He can only choose which way to go after you decide, he has no control and no say in it.

It would be nice to get unconditional love from your spouse, but if you want unconditional love you should have children.

Answer 20

Okay this is your 10th time to ask this question ~ You probably have over 100 different answers, so why do you keep asking?  Do you want someone to tell you to have one and everything will fine and you'll live happily ever after?  

Well wake up honey ~ Abortion is murder, If I was a guy leaving for the army and my pregnant wife had am abortion without me knowing I would flip out and not want to return home to you!

Answer 21

This would be completely up to you if it is right. We can all give you our opinions but its going to be you who has to deal with it and move on. I am not judging you some people are not ready and you have to do what you have to do. Some of the religious people judge others when it comes to issues like these but what ever happened to "not judging others" that goes out the window i guess. i have a daughter and I would support her 100% in anything she ever decided to do. The secret is not to judge others because when you judge people it comes back to you maybe not in what you are judging them for but in other ways. Good luck to you!

Answer 22

I agree with joe, it takes two

Answer 23

Listen abortion is a personal choice and should not be dictated by those who believe differently, I swear this country is going backwards when religion starts dictating to the state