Should babies adopted in the USA belong to those parents?

Question

Is it right if a mother puts her baby up for adoption that she has the right to claim them back at any time from the people that adopted the baby? I know its a law but whats the sense to it? It only applies to babies adopted from the US.

Answer 1

Adoption is legally binding. When it is completed, the actual birthparents have relinquished all rights regarding the child.

Answer 2

That was one of the main reason my husband and I decided against adoption.  Too much risk there.  I would die if I loved a baby for years and then one day a woman my baby has never met says I want him back!  Just couldn't do it!

Answer 3

Ok; the sense is that most mothers who surrender are not educated on adoption. Because; usually the people she goes to benefit from her placing her child for adoption. They forget to tell her of the life time effects.

I see another comment here; you go in front of a judge; LMAO!! Yes; you should but do you know how many attorneys skate around that one? They sure did with my son. No; I never fought the adoption of my son; but the more I am seeing; I think I was very wrong not to. I was told; how much better adoptive parents were then me. And; from what I am reading here; I am scared what I will find my son's life to be. If I knew this was the mind-set of adoptive parents; not even God would have taking my child from me.

Oh; and if you are one of those people who refer to a baby as "it" e-mail me at [e-mail]; theres a post on my blog for you today!!!!!!

Answer 4

Your information is wrong once the adoption is finalized the birth parents CANNOT take them back they have like a 30 day window but that is it.

Answer 5

I have never heard of that law. I don't believe that is true though. When you decide to put a child up for adoption, you go to a hearing at court terminating your parental rights. then there is a waiting time for you to appeal your desision. Like 30 days or a few months. after the waiting time, the adoption hearing takes place. Once your rights are terminated it is extremely difficult if not impossible to have that reversed.

Answer 6

that is not completely true as seen with the last 3 cases of birth parents kidnapping their birth child out of fear that the court will not give them back. i do know that in some states they have a time frame from the time they give up the child to the time they can change their mind. Some women give up their childeren due to postpardom depression and then when the depression is gone they realize what they have done and try to get their children back. Me personnally i think it is always better for the child to be with the birth parent as long as they aren't at risk of being abused. but it also isn't fair to the adoptive parent to get a child that they think is going to be theirs and then have them taken from them. I think they need to have a special unit to hold the children ( foster care etc.) until the time frame runs out and then given to a family so that both parties have a chance to make sure that's what they want. For me this all about how the child feels not the birth parents and not the adoptive ones.  a child doesn't need to be dragged back and forth over custudy. it's not fair to them.

Answer 7

No I don't think it is right because once you make the decision to adopt then you shouldn't be allowed to change your mind and take the baby back from the only parents that it ever knew.  I think once you make the decision to put the child up for adoption then you should learn to deal with your decision.   If you take the child back then the adoptive parents don't get their money back and they get broken hearts and won't try to adopt again in the USA for fear that the birth mother might change her mind and take the child back.  That is why I will never adopt from the USA. I don't want to get attached to a child and then have the birth mother take it back.

Answer 8

She doesn't have the right to claim the baby back at any time.  She has a waiting period that is designed to make sure that she didn't make the decision under duress or experience severe regret over the decision.  I've heard that some states don't have a period like this at all & some states have a six month period for this.  I'm not sure what the average is or what the longest is, but I do think it's a good thing to have a short time period (say three months or so) for her to exercise that right.  Sometimes the girl's/woman's family forces her to choose adoption.  Sometimes she's convinced by a less than ethical lawyer or agency.  

Can you imagine being the adopted child...all grown up...where the birth mother was forced by her husband or parents (depending on her age & circumstances) to make an adoption plan for the child.  Maybe she was told that they would beat her, kill her or kick her out on the streets if she didn't choose adoption.  Ok, so fast forward three months...she regrets the decision and she would like to parent the baby and that option isn't available to her.  She lives a life of regret.  Now fast forward 20 years.  You (the adopted child) starts on a search for your birth mother so you can begin to make more sense of your identity and find out important family history information.  You find out that your birth mother regretted allowing you to be adopted & that she only chose that because at the time she felt there was no other option (literally, her life was in danger) and that she would have chosen to parent you if it had been otherwise.  So...how do you feel as the adopted child?  Do you feel almost as if you'd been kidnapped by your adoptive parents?  Do you feel like you should have been able to grow up with your birth mother?  Do you regret your whole childhood experience?

I know it would stir up feelings in me that would be very difficult to deal with.  It would probably strain the relationship with my adoptive parents (if it were me) even though they did NOTHING wrong since they didn't even know about the regret and that she'd changed her mind.  It would change my whole world view and everything.

So..that's my take on it with my "what if" scenario thrown in.

Kelly, btw, not all adoptive parents share the same thoughts, ideas and feelings on adoption.  We're adoptive parents & while we adopted internationally, we strive very hard to make sure the girls have a healthy view of themselves, their birth parents and their birth culture.  It is our hearts' desire to do what is best for them no matter what it is or what it costs us.

Answer 9

I do not think it's a law everywhere..you would have to check with your state court house.

Most places give the mother a certain amount of time and then when that time passes they cannot change their mind.

Make sure you get the forms for maternal and paternal desolution of rights signed before you agree to the adoption.  This will prevent them from taking the baby back.

Good luck

Answer 10

I think biological parents (either one) should be able to claim the baby back for up to 6 months. That presumes that the correct father has been notified.  This isn't paint you are taking home from the store. Heck, you get more time to return the paint than to change your mind in some states regarding a BABY!  This is a life and many young people are lied to about their rights and options or threatened by family members.  Birthmothers not only get no counseling, they have no legal representation. The adoption agency works for the adoptive parents because that is where the money is coming from.  Most men who don't even know they are a father have no clue about 'registries'.  One guy, Ohio, I think, called 15 different government offices yet couldn't find the bio father birth registry to prevent the adoption of the child his ex-gf didn't tell him about.  

A criminal is entitled to a lawyer, why not a birthmom?  Why not make it easier for birthdads to get their children if they want them?  Stop the swindling and enforce good laws.  There will be fewer 'take backs' when that happens and a lot less pain.

BTW, what laughable person said you go before a judge? 90% of birthparents NEVER SEE A JUDGE!