Question:

Should i lend him the money?

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i am going off to university in september and living in residence that is 4 hours away from home. my parents had no money saved up for my education (tuition fees, residence) so i had to get a loan from the bank at the last minute. i kept asking my dad if he had any money to give me for my tuition fees and he said no. so i got the loan from the bank and the money they're giving me is just enough to pay for the whole year (i have no other money other than the loan). then my dad comes to me today and asks if i can give him $2,000 from the loan to pay bills and remorgage the house. what to do? should i even consider it? he said he would pay me back in 3 months. but if i give it to him i'll be short money to pay for my tuition fees. Also, my dad has a histtory of not oweing ppl back their money. he has a lot of debts and i gave him $130 last year and he still never payed me back. he was the one who never gave me money in the first place for school so why should i give him any? what should i do? i dont want him to be mad at me.

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19 ANSWERS


  1. tell dad to take a hike.

    actually you could always say the bank will pay the school directly (after all that's what they based the loan on in the first place, right?)  so you really wouldn't be lying.  just tell him you don't get to physically handle the loan.


  2. Do not give him a dime, and get out of that house in time.

    He is playing a "guilt trip" on you, and it will never stop.

    His history has proved it, already. Get out ASAP.

    I would want him very MAD at me, so mad that he knows

    "you mean business."

    My dad tried to pull the same thing on me.

    I was an orphan, until I Joined the Navy. <}:-})

  3. If the loan is barely enough to pay for school, you don't have anything to loan him anyway.

    If needs money that bad, tell him to go to the bank himself.  

  4. Tell him sorry man cant help you out/ Your education is more important than him and his $2000. He's an adult he knows what he has to do to get him out of the situation he got himself into. Its your credit so you dont want to mess it up this early in life.

  5. Your dad has no business trying to get money out of you

    Just tell him no, nicely, and that you need it all for school so you can amount to something.

    If he is an a******* he will call you selfish and ungrateful etc.

    At this point , you should start thinking about crossing him out of your life

    He will not fit the bill as a role model.

  6. Sorry... you know the answer.  That is: NO!

    Tell your dad it would be fraud for you to do this..... BTW... if you had a child in your position...... would you approach them this way???? I think not.   This is so unfair & so unhealthy what he's trying to do.  Be realistic, love your dad, but treat him as an adult that needs to find his own solutions to the problems he's created.

  7. Don't lend him money if you wouldn't give it to him first.

    Chances are, you won't get paid back.

    Trust me, "something" will come up.

  8. What does mum say?

    pls reply

    been there,done that & would like to add more

  9. No.  You got the loan, it's your money and you need it for tuition.  Let your father borrow from someone else... don't do this to yourself.  Take care hon.

  10. I don't think you should. Because:

    - it will likely violate the terms of your loan agreement

    - it could affect your credit rating - not something you really think of because you don't realize how important a credit rating is until you go to apply for another loan, try to buy a car, get a mortgage or even apply for a credit card

    If your dad really cares about you, he would not ask you to put your future in jeopardy, both financial and regarding your education. It sounds like your dad is being really selfish. Make the right decision for you and don't lend him the money...which will ultimately be the best decision for him as well.

    You have a good head on your shoulders, dude. Education is so important. So is your credit rating. Good luck. Hopefully you can help your dad in other ways.

  11. i would have to say no. loaning money to family is one of the worst things you can do. sure its all good intention but so many families are ripped apart by financial issues that i don't know if you would want to risk it. if he never payed you back the 130 how do you think he will pay back 2000? and you need all your money for tuition so use that as your reasoning if/when you turn him down. hope this helps!

  12. I am sorry to say this but DON'T DO IT!!!

    If he hasn't paid you that minimal sum of 130$ then he doesn't deserve $2000 from you.

    Your dad should know better and that you need to pay your tuition which at the moment is more important for you.

    I know it's hard, but your dad said no to you, just explain that you will not be able to pay tuition and that he should deal with it. If he's mad at you for that, he'll get over it.

  13. go to school

  14. NO WAY !!!!

  15. Draw a line in your mind that you will not give him money you owe the bank.

    Then, calmly outline that this loan will cover your year.  Explain that when you finish that one year, you will work and save money, go back for a second, third, and fourth year and finally you will get a degree.  Once you have a degree you will be in a position to GIVE him money, not just lend it, and then plan to do that.  Once you have a degree and are paying back your loans.

    Your dad can emotionally blackmail you with making you feel badly, but think of this as tough love  - you love him, but he will need to organize himself to help himself.  You can help him once you get organized, and that will take a college degree.

  16. You need to stand your ground on this one. Whatever you do, do not give him any of your college money. He needs to figure out his own finances. Your school is the most important thing right now, don't let him ruin that for you. Best of luck.

  17. Never lend money to friends or family because you'll never get it back. My sister once told me that mom was low on funds so she ask my wife and i if we could give her $100 every other week. I agreed to it. When I gave her the $100, she turned around and gave to my sister and bro in law and they ran out of the apt. It was the first and last $100 We gave anyone.

  18. No.  I don't think you should lend him money.  The money you have is for you to go to school and nothing else.  It will help cover your living expenses while you are there.  Plus if he isn't going to pay you back, you shouldn't even consider it.

  19. No, don't do it. You will regret it if you don't get to go to school. Then no one will have a future. That money is for school and needs to be used for it.  

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