Should i share custody or terminate parental rights?

Question

i am filing for divorce in tx. i was in a verbally and physically abusive relationship for 8 years. he was also an alcoholic and is currently in jail. (so he could resume his alcoholic ways when he returns to the free world.)

I wanna terminate parental rights and am currently filing out divorce papers. I feel in my heart that this is the correct choice for two of the three kids we have together. Should i?

He is also manipulative and tells only God knows what to my kids when he did see them. They are better without seeing him and are happier. Im just afraid the judge will ask me why? i know i have good reasons (he pushed me around and called me names while i was pregnant with my last child whom is only 1) Im just not sure how to explain this to my children.

well, i have been rambling on and on. Should i terminate rights?

i can exagerate further if needed.

Answer 1

Go for the whole enchilada.  If your reasons aren't good enough the judge will tell you that.  The judge knows that you are not a lawyer so just explain it to the court as best you can.  Tell the truth and make sure that your wishes are clear.

Answer 2

An abusive person like that will always be abusive and if he dosen't have you to kick around then guess what.  He will definitely take it out on your children.  Remember your job is to protect the children.  There are thousands of single parents out there who have been through abusive relationships that have raised the most amazing kids by keeping them away from their abuser.  I would file for full custody, ask that he give up his rights.  If he says no then insist that he be placed in a program and that if he has visitation that it be under court supervision.  I would also try to get him into counseling.  In the mean time make sure the kids get some professional help too.  All these things you can have the judge order but you have to ask for it.  Remember your job is to protect the children.

Answer 3

If he was abusive then you must terminate rights for the safety of your children not to mention yours.  

Answer 4

In most cases a judge will not terminate rights without someone else willing to adopt the children and provide for their support,such as a spouse. A judge will not leave a child fatherless or without support.  

Answer 5

I feel for you....terminate his rights...

Answer 6

It's not really just up to you.  You will absolutely have to convince a judge that it is the best for the children.

Telling the kids 'only god knows what' isn't going to do it, you would have to be able to show that there is a serious risk of harm to the kids by the father being involved.

You need to think long and hard whether you are trying to do this to help the kids, or punish the father.

Personally, my preference would ALWAYS be for the father to be involved.  Move for full custody with only supervised visitation if you must, but every child deserves to have two parents, no matter how screwed up they might be.

Answer 7

I doubt you will be able to find a judge that will do this.  You selected this man to father your children and continued to have more babies with him, yet now you deem him unfit?  Children need a father.  If you think his visitation should be supervised you can petition the court for that and if the judge agrees he will make that order.  But I'd bet money he will not terminate his parental rights.

Answer 8

Has you husband been sentenced to prison for a felony?  Or is there some other statutory grounds you are planning to use to terminate his rights?

You say you "can exagerate further", so you likely do not have legal grounds to terminate parental rights.

The judge likely will not ask you, the proper place to explain why you want termiantion of rights is in the pleadings, which are public documents.  And also must be served on you husband.  Who will beat you again when you let him come home.

You have to prove legal grounds for termination, usually a parent cannot terminate the other parents rights, it is an action pursued by the state.

The child has a right to his parents, both of them, and if you try to terminate his rights you would be forgetting the rights of the child.  the child also has a right to be supported by both parents.

But don't worry, you will be required to take a parenting class before you can be granted a divorce.  

If he refuses to take the parenting class he won't be allowed to have visitation without supervision.  Even with a felony you likely won't be granted termination, but you should make him support his children anyway.  And you should be going after the father of the other child for support.

The state attorney general's office will prosecute the support case for you if you cannot hire an attorney, but the court will likely not grant a divorce without some provision for support of the children of the marriage.  

Good Luck

Answer 9

I don't know, use your best judgment, but he wouldn't be abusive to your kids would he?

My step dad was the the same way with my mom, but he wouldn't ever hurt my brother+ I think he grew up over the years.

They have shared parenting it works out pretty well. But do what you have to.  

Answer 10

children deserve both parents, no matter your opinion of your ex.  There are such things as supervised visitation and things like that..  Its not up to you to take away your childrens father.   they need him as much as you.  Parents who do this often times find that when the children grow up and find or get to know the parent they never knew, they end up resenting the one who terminated or kept them from the other...   I recommend filing for sole custidy with him having supervised visitation. and get them counseling.