Should parents teach their kids to fight back or walk away?

Question

I personally teach my son to walk away from a threatening situation (ie. a fight) rather than use his fists - but i know some parents who teach their kids that its ok to punch back or fight if threatened etc at school.

Answer 1

In this day and age, you almost have to teach to walk away.  You never know what the other person will do and if they have a weapon or whatever.  Kids younger and younger carry weapons and harm other children because of what they learn at home.  I would hate for my child to say he learned violence from home.  I want my child to feel safe at home and not threatened and I don't want him to propose violence on others.  

Answer 2

I'm 15, and still have situations that i have to choose to fight or walk away. But iv have noticed, that walking away sometimes does not work. If it is a bully, they keep niggling at you until you snap, and basically, let rip at them. And they wonder why you are "kicking off" at them, when all they said was one thing. I do believe in sticking up for yourself, but in this day and age, you can not be sure what will happen. There is no such thing as a fist fight anymore, or a good brawl,and be done with it. its all guns and knives, and ganging up, on each other.  

Answer 3

I guess it depends on the situation however to teach defense rather than fighting back makes a big difference to the child psychologically, making them more well balanced.I think there is a fine line though, my ex was bullied at school and he'd swear he only defended himself.....but he did become a very aggresive person in many ways.

I teach to walk away and ignore also as we dont want our children to have destructive behaviuors.

Answer 4

I'd say to avoid trouble let them walk away.

Answer 5

I have two boys ages 10 and 12 and when my youngest was in 3rd grade there was a boy who kept giving him a hard time. It started with names, then it got physical. We kept telling our son just walk away and he did, tell the teacher, tell us and he did. The school didn't do anything but talk to him and his parents supposedly. Then one day my son comes home and tells us that this boy grabbed him in the private area and what did my son do, he walked away because that is what we told him to do. Well that day our just walk away opinion changed. I believe that if someone is just saying mean things to you, you should just walk away they are just words and my boys know that and they do that. However, they have been told that if someone lays a hand on them to fight they are to defend themselves. That if someone walks up to them and grabs, pushes, hits them they have the right to use physical force and while the school frowns upon that and they will be suspended or RPC from school they will not get a punishment at home. Since the schools are not doing anything to protect our children it is our responsibility to our children to teach them how to be able to protect themselves.

Answer 6

with the way the world is now a days, walking away is the best idea.

Kids now a days wont just use their hands any more.

Answer 7

I think one of the best ways to deal with this is for a child to learn martial arts---especially if bullying, etc. is a problem.

They gain confidence that they can not be pushed around, but at the same time they learn restraint---which is the ideal--that everyone should walk away most of the time.

But, if it is one of those cases where they just can not walk away they can handle the situation.

Answer 8

I used to teach my son to walk away in most situations. He knew how to fight back if he really needed to and knew the situation and time for it. I think nowadays it's hard to tell a child to always walk away, there are some situations where they just can't.

Answer 9

We walk away, and my kids are taught violence is not acceptable.

You wouldn't want them to hit someone who is carrying a weapon, which seems to be the new trend.

Answer 10

I've always taught my kids that you never start a fight but if some one is hitting you and continues after you try to walk away ...turn around and kick there butt...If your a boy and you don't stand up for yourself  a lot of the other boys will know this and say and do things just to see if you will do anything....about it...Years ago if you got into a fight at school the gym teacher would give  you five to  ten minutes to fight it out ..but once the fight was over you were not to fight again... or you got kicked out of a school..Now at school you get suspended if you start the fight or not..which to me is wrong if you are defending yourself and aren't starting the fight you shouldn't get suspended.As far as telling the teachers...they a lot of times are so busy the really don't hear what a child is saying to them ..in less your child is being disrespectful to them even in the tiniest way then of course they can hear then..I'm old school parent I believe had they left corporal punishment in school half the kids in the school would stop mis- behaving...yes I still have kids in school...yes I believe in spanking my kids when there misbehaving..and yes I want my kids to defend themselves if need to...Walk away if you can but don't be a punching bag waiting on a grown up to show up....God knows how long that could be....Thank God we live in The US where everyone can raise there kid/kids there own way...

Answer 11

I was always taught to fight back. not to throw the first punch, but don't wait for it either. As in, be nice to people, but if someone is rude to you do something about it ( not necessarily meaning physical violence)

Answer 12

Walk away is the right thing to do, however make sure to make it the norm to chat about these situations so that you can keep an eye on them to make sure it isn't turning into regular bullying  

Answer 13

fight back!!! if someones trying to hurt you, they need to be hurt.

Answer 14

Well nice Question and really smart My friend in some cases if its a bully and he didnt do anything to him,he is just being a bully i would say to my son fight back.

If my he is Wrong my son i would tell him to walk away.

Also another situation that if they were 3 or 4 people want ot fight him in any situation just walk away.

Take care I hope i helped !

Answer 15

school is not a place for fighting you should walk away from thse situations