Should the children be taken away from this mother?

Question

Today I stopped at In N Out for lunch. I got a window seat as usual and as I was eating, I was gazing the street and the area. As I saw a car pulled by, this obese woman steps out of car with two kids, one boy and one girl in tow. The woman was pretty obese, but not morbidly to point where she cannot walk properly or anything. Both kids were rather chubby. I didn’t really pay attention to them as they were just one of other customers.

About 20 mins later as I was almost done eating, I notice the boy was running around and not sitting out of corner of my eyes. Of course this catch my attention, so I turn and saw this boy was running around the place while his mother just sat at the table and yell at him repeatedly. I just ignore them again because I’ve seen this happened before and usually parent would get up and grab the kid. After a moment or so, I turn and saw this boy was still running around, the mother was holding out a fries and beg him to come. I thought to myself “gee what a dumba$s! If kids know their food will still be there, why bribe them with it?” but at same time I was happy the boy didn’t fall for the stupid bribe. A second later, the boy bumped into one of the customer, the customer almost dropped his drink and the boy stumbled and landed on is butt. I was expecting to see the mother getting mad and do something about it big time.

To my surprise and disgust, the mother just yelled at him some more, but the boy just got up and won’t go to the table. The mother finally picked up a couple more fries and holds them out to him. The boy eventually walks up to the mother but staying just out of her reaches. He stares at the fries for a couple seconds as the mother begged him in whinny way to come to her. I was about to chuckle at this, but the boy finally succumbed to the bribe and went to her. She finally grabbed him and put him in seat and makes him stay there. At this point, I feel a huge part of me just die and I was so disappointed and sad by what I witnessed that I just end up leave.

I don’t understand why would a mother do this?! I know if I was to try something this guy did, my mom would ask just once or maybe twice. If I didn’t listen to her and she have to get up and bring me back to the table, I’d be in huge trouble. If I bumped into a customer because I was being so careless, I’d be getting some serious heat over this big time. Plus my mom would NEVER dream of trying to bribe me to come back to the table with my own fries or even bribe me into anything (except on extreme rare occasion when I’m in late teenage). Plus if I was in that boy’s shoe, bribing me to come to the table with piece of fries or anything will NOT work at all! If I want to play, then that is what I will do unless someone comes to me and make me behave. It was pretty much the same for all of my friends as well.

Is this a new method of trying to disciplining your kid or getting them to behave or what? It is just so depressing to see how stupid and lazy people, especially the parents have got.

Answer 1

This mother is not a good parent.The kid will learn quickly he can do as he pleases because she isn't going to get off her butt and do ANYTHING about his bad behavior.If all kids were taken from parents like this, we wouldn't be able to build enough orphanages to put them all.

Answer 2

She sounds lazy, and neglectful towards her kids.The shop owner should have said something to her, or she should have left with them and the food, and apologize to the people.She should have handled the problem right away instead of letting them run.They should be at a park with a picnic for something like that. I feel sorry for the kids, her behavior with effect them later on and possibly the way they raise their kids in the future!

Answer 3

Not enough reason to remove the child from it's mother. The mother should have had more power in handling her child, she just seemed very lazy and instead of taking care of the problem right away, she let it drag on and on which makes the child behave more badly. It happens all the time, kids run around the stores, kids making loud noises throwing a temper tantrum, sometimes it is the parents that allow it because they aren't taking care of the problem like they should, sometimes it is just the child that is straight out bad and cannot be handle with. Just because you have a misbehaved child you can't think the best solution is to remove it from it's mother? If that were the case then I say at least 75% of kids these days might as well end up elsewhere instead of with their mothers.

Answer 4

no all parents bribe their kids sometimes  who knows what happened before that moment maybe he has ADD or is just bored of fast food!  she should learn better ways but not have them taken away

Answer 5

A KID IS GOING TO BE A KID WHETHER U LIKE IT OR NOT. THAT BOY COULD HAVE BEEN  MENTALLY ILL OR SOMETHING YOU DON'T KNOW. YOU MUST HAVE HAD A LOT OF TIME ON YOUR HANDS TO SIT THERE AND WATCH THIS FAMILY EAT. MAYBE FOOD IS THE ONLY WAY THE CHILD BEHAVES. THAT IS A STUPID A$$ RWASON TO HAVE THESE KIDS REMOVED FROM THEIR MOTHER. I BE DAM IF SOME1 SAT UP THERE AND WATCHED ME AND MY KIDS EAT AND WATCH MY KIDS RUN AROUND, BOTH OF MY KIDS HAVE ADHD SO U DON'T KNOW WHAT WAS UP WITH THEM, AND YES MY KIDS DO ACT UP IN PUBLIC, BUT THEY CAN'T HELP IT CUZ OF THEIR CONDITION. THAT'S WHAT MEDS ARE FOR, AND MAYBE THERE IS SOMETHING WRONG WITH THE KIDS AND SHE CAN'T AFFORD TO TAKE THEM TO GET CHECKED. MY ADVICE TO YOUU, STOP BEING SO d**n NOSEY AND FIND YOU ANOTHER HOBBY, LIKE LEARNING PROPER ENGLIS. GO FIND URSELF.

Answer 6

why does your "story" have to be about obese people, thin people do this too its called lack of parenting skills..weight has nothing to do with it, trust me there are skinny lazy people in the world too...also talking about stupid and lazy you may want to re-check your spelling and wording in your story before you make remarks about others

Answer 7

she is an extremely lazy parent that isn't smart enough to come up with another form of dicipline other than bribery. there are alot of things is see that the kids should be taken away from the parent for, but this is something that would never happen.

she is allowing him to walk all over her, and she will regret her actions soon, if not already.

reading other peoples answers, i think the obese issue comes into play, with the fact that she is trying to bribe her kid with food. why would a person "bribe " their child with food when they are already on the path to a life of obesity? if i was obese, i would try my hardest to get my children to NOT follow in my footsteps. i understand there are underlying medical conditions, etc. but fried french fries are not a help, even for medical conditions. i get your point. she probably  bribes her kids with twinkies and ho-hos at home. that is why they are the way that they are.

but in answer, i don't think they should be removed. some parents don't think about the repercussions of things until it is too late, and if she was at a resturaunt with her kids, she cares enough about them to take them out and let them have a little fun. that is not abuse-

Answer 8

Can I ask why it matters if the woman is obese or not? I don't get that. Anyway, mind your own business. Read your silly question after you've had children.

Answer 9

Get over it!

Answer 10

to answer the question no i dont think they should be taking away from the mother!!

i think you must get some kind of activity in your life... i cant believe i just read that, and even worse i cant believe you take so much interest in strangers lives!! and even come online to tell the world about it.. you dont know why that lady did that, or even if it was her kids... i suggest you focus more on yourselves and let others get on with their on life..

Answer 11

Should she lose her children for letting them run a little amok and for being rude? No. You don't know what kind of day's she had. While I always try to be polite when I'm in restaurants, sometimes things just happen.

Was is an example of poor parenting skills? Probably, but I don't know her, her child, or her circumstances. Neither do you.

That said, what does her weight have to do with poor parenting skills?

Answer 12

NO she should not have her children taken away. What for? It didn't sound like anyone was being abused.

You spent WAY to much time on this question.  

Answer 13

I can't figure out why the weight of the mother is even an issue here...you're not her doctor or her lover so it's really none of your business.

It sounds like the mother should have disciplined the children a bit better, or taken them home when the boy started misbehaving.  It certainly doesn't sound like the children should be taken away from the mother.  There are plenty of parents who are actually abusing their children or neglecting them...taking your kid to a restaurant and then bribing him with fries is not child abuse.  Sometimes kids do run a little wild.  I take mine home if they start to get rowdy, but I've seen others who don't.  Sometimes it's because the kids are special needs kids and need to be out in public to learn, but don't know how to behave in a manner that doesn't disrupt others.  Sometimes it's just because the mother is at wit's end with the kids, and figures it's better for them to get all their energy out, then they'll be tired when they get home.  Before I had kids, I used to look at other parents and think of everything I thought they were doing wrong.  Now that I have my own children, I know what a challenge they can be sometimes, and I've learned to be a little more patient and not judge others.

Oh, that's funny...I just read what you said about how she should have dragged the child by the arm...gosh, wouldn't that be child abuse?  I'm sure if she did that, some other know-it-all would be posting about how the poor little guy was just being a kid, and his huge, brutish mother was dragging him around and stifling his spirit.