Should we have an unwed mother's registry ?

Question

someone emailed me this idea in response to my other question. they sugest instead of a paternity registry all unwed mothers giving children up for adoption have to be on. it's not the scarlet letter thing from the past. if they know the father great. if they have a pretty good idea cool. fathers have to fill out a form in texas personal info moms info and childs to best of knowledge if they want to contest an adoption or claim the child. shouldn't the women giving them up be required to do the same?

Answer 1

Sounds fair.  I completely understand where you're coming from.  Putative fathers registries need to be abolished.  They're  in place simply for unethical agencies to be able to continue to practice shady, unethical adoptions.  

I'm so sorry about what you're going through.  I hope and pray you can get your baby back.  Those adopters have no right to keep your baby.

Answer 2

It sounds like a good idea to me. At least the beginning of a good idea. As far as pregnancy being personal. When I was pregnant all you had to do was look at me and you could tell from a mile away that I was definately having a baby. Same thing for a wedding ring. To some people the privacy of being unwed and pregnant is still more important than fathers rights. More important than keeping a child with one of their natural parents. More important than keeping a child in touch with their natural grandparents, cousins, aunts and uncles. How sad. I think something should be done to protect fathers rights and children who could have been parented by their fathers. I don't know if this is it, but it's a start. Privacy quickly turns into secrets and lies.

Answer 3

Actually, I think you have a good point there, but it would require men to check it regularly. For comparison, how many people here regularly check the listing for registered s*x offenders in their area?  Most don't even check it in the first place and it's been on the internet for 5 years!  It also doesn't resolve the problem of some agencies (and parents) moving the pregnant woman to another state in order to get out of notification laws. Legislators need to mandate an actual investigator for every case to track down the father. DNA should be required to verify who the father is.  The chances of a mother not knowing who the father is almost zero unless she was raped, was a prostitute or a heavy drug user.  A police-trained investigator can find nearly anybody in an hour or two.  

Also, one person brought up the fact that maybe the mother would be endangered by the father.  In that case, legislators could make an exemption to run the DNA through the database.  Someone who is that violent is likely already known to the cops somewhere and a judge could then make a determination from there.

Father registries are unconstitutional and you will find them all falling to the wayside once current cases wend their ways through the courts. It's disgusting that legislators would even THINK that this is a good thing.

Answer 4

It might be a good idea, but if a guy has s*x with a girl, does anyone actually think he'll periodically check the registry to see if he knocked anyone up?  I suppose it doesn't matter either way.

Answer 5

You mean we should give gifts and praise to someone who will be on welfare for the next 18 or 30 years  ? disgusting idea

Answer 6

I doubt this will ever happen because in most cases one always knows who the mother is not the case with the father.  I say in most cases because in the days of surrogacy’s/egg donation well sometimes even fertility clinics mess up. There are people that think the father registries should be eliminated.  If a person is upstanding they will try and located the father of their child if they know who it could be. I’m afraid The Maury show is a clear example of how lose some woman can be. This one lady tested 7 men still did not have her baby daddy.  I don’t think someone who is upstanding should  be punished for those few out there that would purposely not tell the father or hope a state etc.

Answer 7

That's kind of personal to make a woman give out her personal info just because she's unmarried and pregnant.  How would you like if you had to put your personal info online for evryone's common knowledage?  Bad idea.  What good can come from this?  These women are pregnant, not s*x offenders.

Answer 8

I think it "sounds" like a good idea, but I'm skeptical because the states advocate for "birth parents privacy" ( even though thats not why records are REALLY sealed) as a reason for sealing the records.

Pro-lifers would have a "field day" with this one saying that it violated their privacy rights and that more women would choose abortion and not adoption. They advocate for safe havens ( legalized abandonment centers ) because its the quickest, fastest, no hassle way of obtaining children.

If mothers had to sign up for a registry that would create a lot more "exposure" for the adoption to "happen."

And for the poster who asked the OP how would he would feel if HE had to sign up for a registry, MEN DO. I suggest you "google" it, but it doesn't come up in google. Its one of the adoption industrys great scams. Create a registry that men have to sign up on in every state if they have intimate sexual relations with a women.  Make it nearly impossible to find for registration and if she chooses to surrender her child to adoption and doesn't notify him, unless he's on that registry his rights CAN be terminated without face to face notice.

Fathers have little rights.

Answer 9

I would have to say no. If a women is considering adoption she should give fathers information but requiring a women to register is not a good idea. What if the conception was due to rape, incest or she is under age?

Answer 10

and who is going to pass this, male or female. laws have ways of getting twisted.....idk