Should you cry in front of your kids?

Question

If something ever got me upset to where i had to cry I would lock myself in the bathroom, cry it out, fix my face and come out like everything was okay because I didnt want to upset my 2 year old or baby.

However I was watching Wife Swap last night and one of the moms was really cold and her kids never saw her cry or even be nurturing and it had a negative effect on the kids.

I'm very loving and show my kids attention and love all the time but i dont cry in front them. Is this bad or good? What are your opinions?

Answer 1

i dont think you should act cold and emotionless in front of your kids (not saying you are). but i always felt really uncomfortable and guilty when my mom would cry in front of me. and when i cry in front of my 4 yr old son, he's very concerned about mommy's well being and feel terrible. so i would answer no. good question.

Answer 2

I'll cry in front of my 2 year old sometimes for whatever reason it is, and she doesn't even seem to notice.  They don't know or care at that age yet.   My 7 year old will sit quietly and then hug me and say it's ok mom.  Then if I cry over a tv show or commercial, my 7 year old is like "mom, stop crying".   I wish I saw my mom cry more.  It would make me realize that she too had emotions and can relate to my teenage emotions too.  That is was alright to cry in front of my parents - I never did - ever.  However, I think that if you are crying because you are fighting with your spouse, then take it elsewhere or some other time, not in front of the kids.  If I saw my parents fight like that as a kid, I would be very worried and scared.

Answer 3

It depends on the situation.  If you're a weak person, crying over every unpaid bill or little crisis, then, no.  Cry behind closed doors.  I think in instances of death, yes, your kids need to see you cry.

I was reading an article about a man who had three sons.  His wife had died, and he spent months trying to "be strong" and not upset his sons.  As a result, his sons never realized that it's okay to cry.  Not crying doesn't make you strong.  There's nothing weak about crying, unless, like I said, you're crying over BS or whining.

Answer 4

its bad if you cry in front of them because it scares them!

Answer 5

I've cried infront of my 21 month old a few times... he's very loving actually... he seems to come and give me a hug and a kiss and say "awwww", i dont generally think its bad to cry infront of kids, in a way, its showing 1 way of expressing emotion.

Answer 6

Crying show kids that it is ok to be sad and show your emotions. As long as your not hysterical or always crying there is nothing wrong with showing those other emotions in front of your kids.

assure them that they did nothing worng, that everyone feels sad and upset sometimes and its ok to feel that way when its expressed in a healthy maner.

i cant stand familes that are always so hush hush and unemotional. that really messes up their kids. my dad grew up with a cold family, my mom didn't. you can tell a huge differnce. its great that you give them love and attention. Crying in front of them wont hurt them, they will learn to understand it.

also i think kids who are taught to show, but contol their emotions tend to be more openminded....which is a great quility in all peple.

i also think that boys need to be taught that is ok to cry and show emotion. my boyfriend has said to me a couple times that he likes how with women you can tell something is worng and that the same way should be with guys. he had lots of troubles with his father and still is copeing with it and openly cried in front of me several times. its good for kids to know that men can cry to and not be weak.

Answer 7

I think that psychologically it's healthy to cry in front of them. It shows it's ok to have emotion. It also teaches them not to be embarrased of showing emotion. I'd see locking yourself away, and coming out like everything is fine, is just the same as lieing to them. Whether they see tears or not, they will sense when somethings wrong. So to me, it's better to just be open about it. Like if someone passes on, it's healthy to let them see the grieving process.

Now crying to them is another story. To go cry to them with your problems would for sure be bad. Being upset, and using the kids as a therapist are 2 different things.

Answer 8

don't expect your kids to open up to you if you won't open up to them

Answer 9

Why wouldn't you want to cry in front of your kids? Crying isn't a bad thing - your kids need to know that crying is okay and that Mommy has feelings that get hurt just like everyone else.

Answer 10

I think it's important to show your kids that it's OK to cry, to feel hurt or sad.  By doing so, you'll show them that it's normal to experience these emotions & show them that they don't need to be ashamed of what they're feeling of feel they have to hide it.  I personally feel that this will help them open up to you more about their feelings.

Answer 11

I want to my kids to know I am a strong woman AND I cry.  I think a lot of people think that by crying in front of their children they are showing weakness, but I think kids need to see this to know that you can be "strong" and still show emotion.

My husband grew up with parents who never ever cried, and he is the same way now.  He has talked many times about how "emotionless" he is and he wishes he could express his emotions better.

People need to learn to express emotions and not be robots.  We need to be real, whether this is around our children, our spouses, our family, strangers, etc etc etc.

Answer 12

I think that crying in your front of your children is a good thing. I mean this in the end teaches your children humility and empathy as well. Which are two of many building blocks to make sure that your child is emotionally developed well. I have two children and they both have seen my cry several times. At first it would upset them, however now my son and daughter comforts me. My son is only a 1 years old and he'll hug me the instant he believes me to be upset. So I think that it is perfectly fine.

Answer 13

Well, depending on your relation ship with your child..... I just wouldn't cry. I caught my mom ccrying when I was younger and It freaked me out. I thought sshe was hurt was started sobbing for hours. Kids imitate their parents, so be careful what you do. GL -Teenweeklypick01

Answer 14

I think it is human to do so. If it is a regular occurrence (like because of depression)...I would say maybe not. That could have a negative effect on kids.