Shyness/awkwardness in the workplace?

Question

Hi all,

I have been at my current job for nearly 5 months now and from the very moment i walked in i felt very awkward and shy.

A few have take out for lunch once a week, every week and sometimes the director offers to buy lunch.

I only live a few minutes from my workplace and prefer to get out of the office at lunchtimes.

At my old place I made friends easily (people my age mainly) and were completely comfortable, but here the people r nice but I am quite a shy person and feel awkward whenever this happens.

Is it completely wrong that I feel like I would rather go home for lunch?

I also have trouble with my shyness and eye contact in situations/around people.

How do I over come this?

Answer 1

There's nothing wrong with wanting to head home for lunch, especially as you live so close to your work!

As for your shyness, its not something that you can really change overnight, but I assure you things will change as you get older.

Shyness is stemmed from being a little unsure about yourself, some say its insecurity or fear of rejection.  When people socialise in groups, those who are 'shy' are said to be afraid of 'not fitting in' with the others.  This happens to everyone, some more than others, especially during teen years and can carry right through into the late 20's.

One of the best stategies for overcoming shyness is to relax and understand that everyone sees things differently.  Sometimes you can be so caught up in what others might be thinking of you that you simply cannot function or think straight.  Its time like this when you should remember that you are perfect the way you are.  

Life is a journey, and there's many lessons to learn along the way.  Relax and enjoy the trip, every little bit of it.

Peace.

Answer 2

I am shy too and it takes me a long time to feel comfortable with people. You might be the same. Thats ok. Its fine. if they can't deal with that its their problem. Just make sure you are friendly and smile alot. I would rather go home for lunch too. Sometimes my coworkers have drinks outside work on a saturday after we finish and i did it once to be friendly but gods i just want to go home. I am there all week I don't need to spend my time off there too. Practise the eye contact. But just try and feel natural. You can try for a quick glance into their eyes or look at a spot on their forehead and they will not know the difference. i don't think anyways. You are gonna be fine.

Answer 3

This sounds like a challenge you need to work on. There is nothing wrong with going home for lunch but if you make a little effort and go through a little awkwardness, it may help you grow as a person, make new friends and make work a lot more fun. I'm not saying you have to go to lunch with them all the time but try it a little past your comfort level, that's where growth lies.

Answer 4

I can be shy too. Just be open and smile and nice

Answer 5

I've worked in a few offices before and am shy at first so I know what you mean. Try to go to the kitchen more often and be open and prepared to say hello when you see people in there. It might seem daunting at first, but once you do start to chat with a few people you'll wonder what all the fuss was about.

Answer 6

Just be strong and confident - remember they hired you for reason making you important to the company...