Sibling rival...need help please

Question

Several years ago I found out I had an older sister. She lives 20 hours from me so seeing her regularly is not easy. I have kids, she has kids and we miss seeing them. However when things don't go her way she insists on the reasoning being because she was adopted. I have never refereed to her as my adopted sister and besides that I had nothing to do with her adoption...i came 4 years later! I get so upset, years after we met our Dad passed away, and I guess he was our common ground because if I don't make the effort nothing is done. I believe she has blocked me from Im-ing her, or sending her emails...we are in our late 30's....do I continue to fight a win less battle????????

Answer 1

You can't change her, you can only change yourself. If she is using excuses not to contact you, then stop the effort your doing to keep things together. Silence can be a great eye opener sometimes and in this case i think she feels smothered. back off a little and allow her the freedom to live without you.

Answer 2

you know, even though you are sisters, you can't force someone to want to be part of your life and if they don't make the effort then don't make it on your part if they don't want u to. just leave things to be and if and when she calls then u can try and work things out between u guys and if not, don't bother, u were fine without her and u can be that way now too