Sister is a b***h. I dont know how to deal with it. please help!?

Question

My sister is such a b***h she has no respect for my mother and is mad cuz I'm the last child.

Its either her way or no way. She has 4 kids and doesn't act like a mother at all. She plays favorites, drinks, smokes everyday and has no time for her kids.some times she doesn't even feed them they eat at my house. She has more time for her "friends" than she does for her own kids and family. Everyone sees this but no one can really say anything. Or has the guts to say anything. When my mom and I do talk she starts yelling and acting like a crazy person. Her kids hate her, I feel bad for them but there is nothin I can do. Her kids tell me all the time that their mother is a Bad mom. She even swears at them and tell them things like go F your self and calls the the B word. And her kids are all younger than 10.

Other people take Better care of her kids than she does. She is like the worst mother ever. Shell have a lot of people over her house at a time and they swear and do other stuff in front of her kids. She is so rude and inconsiderate. My mother is only working one low paying job and she still buys things for my sisters kids and gives my sister money all the time and my sister has the nerve to say that my mom does nothing for her. I also used to watch her kids for her all the time to the point that people would think that I was the real mother. And she has the nerve to say that I do nothing for her.

I feel sad because she treats her kids badly and has no respect for my mother and I feel lonely because that's my older sister. Sisters are supposed to be close. I used to look up to her and now I can't even look at her. I hate her soo much.

I just don't know how to cope with the whole situation

Answer 1

Its called TOUGH LOVE, call CPS (child protective services). I was just told this about one of my family members. If we sit back and do nothing, we are just as bad. Good Luck!

Answer 2

Just try to channel it out.

was she always like this maby you should just sit down and talk to her

or if that does'nt work maby you should search for some real help.

And I am so glad to see someone who cares so much for everyone in her family and trying to make a diffrence.  I hope every thing works out.

best wishes.

Answer 3

It might come down to cutting her from your life. This would be hard for the kids but people like your sister don't change unless they have to and even then it rarely happens. I also suggest a call to child protective services to report her neglect of her children, this might wake her up as to what is really important in life. But otherwise maintain a distance for your own peace of mind.

Answer 4

well it sounds like she abuses her children. probably not phisically but mentally. you can get her reported for child abuse and maybe make her open her eyes and see hwo terrible she really is to you, her kids, and the rest of her family. good luck with this. i know this is a very difficult situation.

Answer 5

I would call child services and get the kids help!  She is not going to help them and they deserve help and love.  What she is doing to those children is abuse no matter what anyone says and you need to step up and get those children the help they need!  Good luck!

Answer 6

Sisters are not necessarily supposed to be close, I'm not close with my youngest sister but that is because we are two different types of personalities and we simply don't see "eye to eye" on some things.  We do treat one another with respect when in family gatherings but we don't see each other outside of family gatherings unless one of us needs the other.  

That said, if you really cared about her children you would be calling social services and telling them that her children are being neglected.  I don't recommend that anyone in the family take the children because being her children she will always have the right to come and get them any time she wants and that will bring more turmoil on the family and put those children right into the middle of it.  However you can ask that if they are put into foster care if you can have liberal visitation with them.  Believe it or not most foster families welcome a child's bio family to remain part of the child's life because it is better emotionally for the children.  

If no one in the family is willing to take these steps then they don't care half as much about these children as they claim to.

Answer 7

  Well that is child abuse that could be split into different categories such as emotional abuse also. What your mother is doing is unacceptable for those and children and you and your older sister seems to be very inconsiderate also. I am in a similar situation just that it is my brother who is insulting me and I have had to stop talking to him because I can not take it anymore. I suggest you tell your mother and sister what they are both doing. Depending on their reactions, whether or not they are positive, positive being an apology and they will do better, and negative being they reject what you are saying and keep doing it. Will determine what course of action you should take. If they are positive give them both one more chance, but just one. If they are negative call child services immediately because no child should have to go through something like that with a mother and older sister who do not care for them. I have to give you a clap also because you truly care for your sisters and are a great person for doing so. Hope this helped, Good Luck, God Bless, and Have a Good Day. Stay strong =).

Answer 8

Here in Cleveland it's called 216-696-KIDS  but call the Child Protective Services in your county and let them know what's going on. Now if you want them in your home then open the doors after making an civil conversation with your sister. If she resist or blow you off then as a human,  you have to do what you have to do. It is what it is, and the kids shouldn't have to suffer on despite of her ignorance. Are/is the father(s) involved?

Answer 9

Its called child abuse.  Do the right thing and turn her in.  The kids don' t deserve to live that way.  With all the company your sister has it sounds like illegal drugs are involved.  Since you are family you would have a good chance of getting the kids until she gets her life together.  

Answer 10

she needs a rude awaking. she needs to be reported to social services. they will give her a warning to straighten up and they will watch her to make sure the kids are taken care of. as for your mother the more she does for her the more she will be helping with her addictions.  have her get the kids after she gets off work,feed them and bathe them and shower them with love,then they can go home to bed and avoid the mother. give the mother nothing,no money ,nothing... help your mom love these kids. if it is possible see if they can live there. at least they would know what life and a family is suppose to be like.your sister isnt seeing life through her own eyes she looking through drog addicted ones and believe me they are cloudy. hopefully she grows up soon.  

Answer 11

This is alot, but sooooooo helpful and not boring so please read.

My moms sister is the same way.... well, since she wont talk to you then write a letter to her telling you how you feel and there is this program that if you have seen child abuse like that you should call them and maybe they could come live with you. I'm so sorry about this whole situation... wait... how old are cause if your not 18 yet you cant adopt them. Try and get them to go elsewhere during the day cause if they see their mother smoking and drinking they could grow up to be like her. and they will learn curse words and start using them before knowing they are bad. SO your also saying you looked up to her? and now you dont. DO you know what could have happened in the past for this to happen? When you guys were kids, was everything cool or not? And also im just throwing this out, when my mom and her sister were kids my mom would cover for her sister if she snuck out at night. And now they dont even speak.And for all the questions i asked about(you only have to answer them if you want to) you and your sis please email me the answers. I REALLY hope this helps

Answer 12

pls help her shes in distess

Answer 13

just  tell  here  be   nice

Answer 14

If she is hitting or doing druiga in front of her children you need to report her. If she is as bad as you xlaim she is something has to be done for the kids sake. They will grow up hating her and probably get into trouble with the law. Not to mention that they will be full of anger.

I would have an intrevention with your sister. (intervention- is where all family and friends come together and sit in a room and discuss what the problem is) Make sure that everyone writes a lettter to her ~ how she makes you feel when she does ..... And how you still love her no matter what.. Then everyone goes around the room reading there letter to her. She nneds to know that what she is doing is tearing your family apart. You 2 are blood. You dont have to be doing things together 24/7 but you 2 need to be Civil. For your children.

I would continue to be there for her. But let her know that  the way she is bring up her children is not right. (she will be mad at you for saying that ,but it needs to be said)

Good luck

Answer 15

you need to adopt them if you REALLY LOVE them..

Answer 16

wow thats so sad.

since it sounds that it is a genuinely bad environment for the kids i have to suggest that you report her to child services (you can do it annonymously).

i know it's hard because you are her sister but you have to do it for the kids.

then she will be assessed and the kids possibly put into foster care or care of a family member such as you or your mother.

i don't know what else to suggest

it's so horrible when people change like that.

sorry i can't be more help.

i hope things improve for you.