Sister problem? Please help.?

Question

Ok. Your honest opinion~

In high school, my boyfriend would come over, my sister walked in my room when my boyfriend was there and she was wearing nothing but a t-shirt and underwear? I was so mad and my boyfriend was like “what the h**l was that about?" Then when I was married to my ex-husband, she came to visit me and was walking around the house in revealing clothes, I feel like she was being disrespectful to me. I now am remarried and afraid when I come home and visit she is going to be the same way with my husband when he is around? I live in the UK so it has been a while since I have been home, and they have never really met. This is so disrespectful to me, what is she trying to accomplish?

I know that my husband would never do anything, but she is my sister what is she doing? I would never do that to her and her boyfriend!!!

Answer 1

Sounds like your sister likes to get a rise out of you.  Get one out of her first.  Here's what you do.  Call her up and chit chat for a bit.  Then casually say, 'Hey, I'm coming home to visit with Rob next month and just want to make sure you have a full wardrobe.  I would hate to think that small T-Shirts and underwear is all you have!  If you need me to go shopping with you, let me know beforehand.  Thanks!'

This way you are pointing out to her that you are on to her games.  You do not appreciate her prancing about and when you are present you expect her to be fully clothed.  If she fails to comply with this, thank her for allowing you to visit (if you are at her house), or thank her for dropping by, but you will have to be leaving as her being half-naked is highly inappropriate and quite rude to not only you, but your husband.  

Good luck but don't mince words.  Let her know you demand respect.  

Answer 2

no offense, but your sister obviously likes attention from men. im sure she doesnt dress that way only when your boyfriends are around. speak up and say something ahead of time. its your sister for goodness sakes! she wouldnt like it, it if it was you being that way.

Answer 3

I don't know your sister so forgive me if I am out of the park with this one but could it be that she is not trying to disrespect you but trying to boost her own self-respect (badly)?

What sort of person is she? Has she been successful in love? Does the fact that you have been in more stable and long term relationships perhaps make her feel less emotionally secure and trying to gain attention from the men in your life is her way of trying to boost her self confidence? (I'm not saying it's a good way to achieve this but the insecure mind comes up with all sorts of crazy solutions)

If this sounds like her and she is a generally reasonable person then it might be that explaining how you feel will make her realise and stop behaving this way, (perhaps without the amateur psychology as this will only make her defensive).

If you don't think this will work then maybe all you can do is grin and bear it. (if you can)

Hopefully you won't reach the conclusion that your sister is a hateful maneater who wants nothing more than to ruin your relationships but if you do then I'd be tempted to issue an ultimatum that she stop doing it or stop contacting you - but that is just me; blood may be thicker than water but they both wash down the drain just the same.

Hope it all works out peacefully

Answer 4

If it happens a lot then she's obviously jealous of you and is trying to get in the way of your relationships to make herself feel better.