Sleeping alone again: help? ?

Question

Okay, so this question may sound a little desperate and I'm sure someone will be able to think of some totally inappropriate answers. But I guess I am getting kinda desperate (to sleep), so I don't really care.

My boyfriend passed away rather suddenly only a few days ago, and I can't sleep. Thing is, I'm too used to sleeping with him. I guess what I'm asking is if anyone knows any way to get past this particular stage. Because lately I've been working on around 10 minutes a day of sleep if that, and I can't seem to concentrate with it. It's 3.21am here right now and I'm still not asleep, but I'm exhausted.

I would love some advice, but if anyone tells me to turn straight/get another boyfriend please don't...

Thanks,

Jason.

Answer 1

dont worry jason. il pack my bags and get a first class ticket (oh but um will you pay for it?) I should get there in about what 10-13 hours. il keep you company, make you laugh and you can sleep with me =] body pillows cant snore and drool like me! Im also a great heater when its cold at night! hehe

lylab

           -Sherry-

Answer 2

Try a body pillow maybe with one of his t-shirts on it or spritz a bit of his favorite calogne on it in time you will be able to go to sleep without it, it's a natural part of grieving, I'm Sorry for your loss. Give yourself the time you need to grieve.

Answer 3

You just have to live with it till it passes.  Sorry but that is life.

Answer 4

I'm so sorry to hear that, genuinely I am. The only things I can think of to help would be to move your bedroom around completely so that it doesn't feel like the room did before, like you're sleeping somewhere new. It will help you to stop associating the room with him. I'm absolutely not implying that you should forget him, but seep is so important and I don't want you to become ill from a lack of it. My oldest friend's father passed away a few days ago and she has the flu from lack of sleep and it's made it harder on her.

Try sleeping in the middle of the bed as well so it feels less empty. I really hope you feel better soon.  

Answer 5

I'm so sorry to hear about your boyfriend.

Like the other lady suggested you could get a body pillow, or a giant stuffed teddy bear.  Also because you've gone through a terrible loss, have you thought about going to a doctor to get something to help you sleep?  Even at the pharmacy they have over the counter sleeping aids you could try, just to get your body back into a routine of sleeping.

Answer 6

Buy a body pillow, that helps me when my husbands gone. Sleep on the couch for a few ngihts.Maybe take something to make you get to sleep.

Answer 7

What about getting yourself a dog? I know some people consider letting animals sleeping in your bed unhygienie, but if you look after her well and ensure shes kept clean then I see no problem with it. It would be a bit of company for you - not just to have her there at night but it would help keep your mind occupied whislt you're grieving the loss of your boyfriend.

xx

Answer 8

go and see your doctor Jason,if he's any good then he will sort you out with some short term medication so that you can at least sleep and allow your body to regroup..I feel like I should or could empathise with you but I really can't imagine your pain to be honest!  just try and get the meds off the doc to get you functioning again and then take it one step/day at a time to grieve and recover from your loss!

Answer 9

See your GP for some temporary medication to help you over this traumatic time, medication does not mean it has be permanent.

Sleep deprivation is not healthy and with the grief you are suffering  alcohol is not the answer either. Try some herbal sleeping tablets first and if not successful go to the GP.

Sorry for your loss.

Answer 10

It's gonna be hard. And I know that feeling of never being able to sleep because I used to have a sleeping disorder. And I understand what it feels like to lose someone you love very much. You just have to be strict about when you try to fall asleep. Start a routine. Go to bed at a certain time every day, and wake up at a certain time every day. Even weekends. (Awww.... I know that can be tough.) The fact your using your computer right now, is a bad thing. Light affects the brain a LOT! And even though that nifty little invention, the light bulb was invented, it also helps s***w up sleeping patterns. So when it's time to sleep, make it as dark as you can, and when it's time to be awake, make your environment as bright as possible. Now that I've talked about the "physical" aspects to help you sleep better, now it's time to talk about the "emotional" aspects.  

It's gonna be hard. Sometimes things like that just happen, and it can be really hard to deal with your feelings the proper way. You just have to go through this. Get your friends and family to help you go through this tough time. I'm really sorry about what happened and good luck buddy.

-Smiley Moss

P.S. I wouldn't recommend going to the doctor for anything other than sleep aids. Don't go get anti-depressants, because going through hard stuff like this makes you a stronger person. Some feelings have to be felt every once in a while.