Sleeping issues?

Question

I am having problems with my oldest who is 23 months old in 5 days. She used to be a great sleeper, from the day she came home from the hospital she always slept from 7:00 pm to 7:00 am with naps during the day. Now she is waking up extremely early, think 4:30 am, and making up the lost sleep during her nap. I have tried putting her to bed later, but she gets extremely cranky and actually goes to her bed on her own without me doing anything, at 7:00 pm she will crawl into bed and say "night night!" I dont know what to do, I am getting tired of waking up at 4:30 am, I thought this was just a phase but t has been happening now for about 2 months. Last night was the kicker for me, I woke up at 3:30 am to feed my son for 30 minutes (he's a bit sick) and then I was up 30 minutes later, ugh. Any suggestions on what to do?

Answer 1

oh yeah. ruby has always been an early waker. since it has been two months, you are going to have to do some "sleep training" if you want to change her schedule. i recommend STRONGLY that you get "solving your child's sleep problems" by richard ferber. be sure to get the new edition as it has been updated to include new research on pediatric sleep. anyway, in the meantime, a few things:

1) total time in bed/crib is, as you said, too long. don't let her makeup sleep during naps.

2) whenever her bedtime is, add ten hours. that is the earliest you will get her out of her crib. so if you wantto insure she is in bed until 6, start with an 8 pm bedtime.

3) when she wakes at 4:30 (or anytime before 6 in this scenario), go to her and tell her "it's still bedtime." give her a sippy cup of water, make sure she is dry, leave her with a toy/lovey, and DO NOT TAKE HER OUT. if she cries, go back after 5 minutes and BRIEFLY comfort her, hand her the lovey, and again say it's still bedtime. if she continues to cry, go in after 10 minutes, then 15, then every 15 until 6 am. at 6 am, go in and make a BIG production of operning blinds, saying good morning, etc. so she knows it is time to get up -- not that she is getting up because she was crying. the next day, start your check ins at 10 minutes, then 15, then 20 until wake time. we just did this with ruby (also up at 4:30). it took 2 weeks, i won't lie, before it was a consistent change, but she did NOT cry a lot. just whining....she was so overtired, and that didn't help. but she sleeps till 6 now.

4) make sure there is no noise at 4:30 every day (garbage truck? birds?) that may be contributing to this. blackout curtains and white noise machines can do a TON to protect morning sleep.

i don't want to make this answer to long -- really, please get the ferber book. it's tough; believe me, i know. i did the 4:30 wake up for a loooooooong time. but it will work if you are consistent, and your baby will be better off, so much better off, for having the healthy amount of sleep.

good luck!

edit: well, in terms of the noise, i think that since she only recently started the waking she is probably very able to sleep through that noise, so i wouldn't really worry too much about it. i wouldn't be surprised if she is regressing a bit in response to the baby. regardless of her reason, though, keeping her in the crib until the wake up time will work. i promise. but the consisitency is the secret, and i had tried it many times before and bailed. once i was consistent, it worked. now, the fact that she may wake her brother is obviously a problem. do you have a portable crib where he can sleep in your room until she starts sleeping in the morning again?

EDIT AGAIN: how old is the boy?

EDIT #3: can he sleep with you for a few nights. i know this may backfire and then HE won't sleep in his crib after that, but maybe not. depends on the baby. i see how the circumstances make this really tough. i feel for you. i think if you can keep in in your bed until she works through this, then, at 7 months, you can get him back on track more simply than it will be to get her on track. of course, you may have to be creative about why he is not sleeping in his room -- don't want her to feel shorted. let me think more about this....