Sloppy 10 year old daughter-what to do?

Question

My 10 yr. old daughter seems to have a problem of just dropping items where ever she wants. When she bakes, or prepares food, I have found jars/ containers that she did not put lids back on tight. I have to check behind her all the time. I have to call her back in the room all the time to put things where they are supposed to go. Can't seem to get through to her about picking up and putting things in their place. It almost seems to be getting worse. Any creative suggestions to help cure her? or will her college roomate have to deal with this also? Is messiness something you can change in a person with practice or will it always be difficult for her?

Answer 1

Thank goodness she's only 10. My housemate is 26. i daren't go into her room. It's like a place hit by a storm.

My advice is:-

You will have to be PATIENT. Do NOT pick up after her BUT in a firm KIND voice tell her to put her things where she took them from.

NO NAGGING!!!!!

I believe, messiness is not inborn though some seem to NOT NOTICE MESSINESS IN THEMSELVES!

Hope your daughter will benefit from your PATIENCE & LOVE.

Answer 2

This will seem harsh, but you have to set up consequences for her if she refuses to live by the house rules.

If she won't clean up her food messes, then tell her the next time she wants a snack that since you are the one who always has to clean up her mess, she will no longer be allowed to get herself a snack and will need to wait for meals because you no longer are going to be doing her work.

If she drops her clothes everywhere, and won't take them to the laundry hamper then tell her that since she didn't show any interest in getting her clothes to the hamper that you assumed she no longer wanted whatever she dropped, and that it no longer will be available. If you have to pick up other items such as i-pods, books, etc, than store them away and deny her access to those things for a week/month/whatever. You are going to have to be vigilant about this, because she will be angry, and upset, but eventually when she is down to one pair of pants, and absolutely nothing to play with, or have an activity with, she will have to start living by the house rules. Once she starts doing what is asked of her, then praise her, and make sure you praise her when she does something without asking. If she starts slipping up, than go back to giving out consequences for her actions.

Answer 3

My dad told me that if I didn't clean up or pick up my mess afterwards he would take away my things, and he'd get mad. That's what made me stop. My sister used to leave lettuce bags everywhere so my dad yelled at her.

Answer 4

Something I learned is that if they are not going to pick up after them selfs take away the privilege basically if she isn't going to clean up after herself when making food take away the privilege of being able to make her own food make her wait until you make the food. She is only 10 so cooking is probably fun for her right now.

Answer 5

Don't let her bake or prepare food unless she is helping you where you can supervise and monitor what she does and remind her how to put things away.

When she just drops things wherever she wants pick it up and put it somewhere that she can't get to and make her pay you a quarter for every item you have to retieve for her.

Answer 6

explain to her that no man wants a dirty or messy woman...

Answer 7

You can try getting something that she really likes and if she leaves it out throw it away or if she doesn't close it well let her have to deal with it the next day. If that doesn't work don't let her touch the food make her wait on you to come and make her something but take your time so she understands.

Answer 8

sit her down and talk to her about being sloppy and that it is wrong to do and that she needs to be more carful...make a deal with her that if she picks up after her slef and stays neat for a whole week you take her somewhere(zoo,movie,somthing she'll like...or give her a candy bar or somthing) if she doesnt stay neat tell her she'll have to do  better next week inorder to get the prize..........

i know this works becuase after my head injury i cried when ever i started to get stressed out...so my mom said that if i didnt cry for a whole week she would take me to eat sushi at a really expensive restraunt just me and her.......and i was only 8...good luck

Answer 9

1. I would have scheduled snack times and be there. for example, Breakfast 9AM, snack 10:00, lunch 12:00 Noon, snack 3PM, dinner 5PM.

2. as for her room and the house, make sure everything has a "home"; a place it belongs and that she knows where it goes. If her room is overwhelming, go through her clothes with her, puit away those that are too small, for winter, she doesn't like.

Put things she doesn't play with on a shelf, or set aside for a memory box. Declutter.