So depressed 'anybody out there?'

Question

im 19, have been feeling low for about 4 years now. it really worsened about a year and a half ago though. ive tried prozac and wellbutren and a couple of anxiety medications. ive went to a few therapists. nothing seems to work with me. i know i should keep trying anti depressants. it just seems like im shooting in the dark at an ant. when im around people its usually worse, like a restaurant or someplace public. i cant seem to organize thoughts well at all. i just look around and feel very very anxious. im okay when im around just one or two of my friends but in groups larger than three i usually keep to myself and clam up. i know it sounds cliche but i really do feel like its always going to be like this. im not really good at talking with people to begin with. sometimes i think its because im lazy, sometimes i think its because its not even worth talking to others, sometimes i think its because i think ill say something dumb. i think if i can open up and talk to people ill be happier. i cant get or keep a girlfriend because of this. ive been called shallow and im beginning to think its true. i cant hold a job to save my life. please any advice, help, suggestions, insight, questions, would be great. cya, zack

Answer 1

have a good long conversation with somebody on the net. they dont have to know who you are they dont have to see who you are. just talk and get it all out

Answer 2

I think u should keep talking to Ur therapists. Even if it doesn't work at first it's always to have somebody there to talk to and have an unbiased opinion. (but make sUre it's somebody Ur comfortable with!) Also, make sure you are eating healthfully. Sometimes ur eating habits can have an effect on how u feel and ur energy level. Lastly, try not to close yourself off from people. It may be hard with the way that ur feeling but people are social animals and it will just worsen it u alienate yourself.

Also, Try exercise it always makes me feel better and as though I have accomplished something even if I have done nothing else that day. lol.

Hope this helps. and feel better

~Meg :)

PS: idk the specifics of Ur situation but don't relay on Ur antidepressants. Not that they don't work at all but people tend to expect them to be magic when they really are not. The only treat the symptoms slightly when Wat u really have to do is find the cause. That is why so many people tend to stay depressed for a while.

Answer 3

u a chick?

Answer 4

have you considered seeing a therapist? talking to someone like a therapist would be helpful to see why you feel the way you do.  medications by themselves do not fix the problem. it should be a combination of therapy and medications. it seems like you may have social anxiety and depression and it's impairing your abililty to have fun in life. what has happend in the past 4 years that have made you feel this way? as a 19 year old, you have your whole world ahead of you. talk to your parents or someone so you can schedule an appointment. i think you'll do well. good luck

Answer 5

i know how you feel man. but don't worry .. you are MOST DEFINATELY not alone. you may be experiencing a little of whats known as 'social anxiety disorder..

along with a little deppresion..

But.. it seems like you've made it in time to get some help. asking for help is a great idea..

but in general.. let me just say this..not everybody you meet will be the same ya know? a few bad experiences doesn't mean that there aren't caring people out there.. it just takes time and a lot of trial and error to find them.. so when you say you worry that talking to people may make it worse.. just keep it mind that you are in a tough place right now.. but thats something you are going to have to deal with on your own..and in your own time. which just means that you gotta be 10x stronger around people.. because you KNOW you're going through something. it'll be easier later to communicate with people once you've caught up with yourself. for now.. i recommend that when you ARE with people.. just remember that everyone is insecure in some way shape or form.. and that THIS TOO WILL PASS.

It isn't your fault that you are depressed.. it isn't your fault that you feel anxious BUT-- i think that one great tool you have right now.. is your ability to train yourself to react DIFFERENTLY to potentially anxiety producing situations.. by getting to know what it is that really sets you off.. if you can some things i strongly recommend are:

1) hypnosis (your mind's subconcious is so powerful.. you can literally re-program yourself overnight) most doctors wont tell you about it because its really cheap and REALLY easy.. and did i mention it WORKS

2) like i mentions.. LOG about it. get control over your irrational thoughts by logging when, where, and what you experienced when the anxiety started coming on. you will begin to see patterns.. try and break through them.

3) ask GREAT QUESTIONS. ask and you shall receive. today you asked.. now you recieved advice.. but everyday .. start asking yourself.. whats working about this..? what isn't working.. soon enough you'll get great answers.

4) If you arent already. GET BUSY WITH HOBBIES. i'll tell you its what saved me.. start hanging out with naturally HAPPY people and do things that MAKE you happy.. wants your focus is shifted to more positive aspects of live.. you 2 will naturally become happy. it really is possible and easy.. but it just takes time.. give yourself a chance.. its a process. YOU CAN DO IT!

Answer 6

i think you have something that afraid of, or something in your past that you cannot forget.  try to search yourself what is it, then face it.  Face your fear, its the only way you can help yourself.  Even you take a lot of anxiety medications or went to another therapists, you cannot do it unless you help yourself.  You have a lot of insecurities in your mind that letting you down whenever you were with people.  Also try to read some books that will develop yourself. good day!

Answer 7

I know this would not be the best answer you can choose, however I would like to stretch some advice for you.  If you were too anxious mingling with the society around you, the best thing that you can do to minimize this character is to read some books on how to mingle with other people with all the confidence that you have. And since you prefer mingling with only a few friends, you can ask them as well some advices on how to confront other people with confidence. Surely they can give you an idea on how to act normally in front of many people as what you wanted to be.  

Answer 8

hmm i have heard that more fresh air would help have you try exercising? improves blood circulation it might help, you dont know if you dun try. i do understand the part about being with two friends and feeling okay with that but uncomfortable with being three or more, naturally you will feel a bit uncomfortable as the extra three friends of yours might not spent a lot of time together with you, perhaps you dun noe them well, perhaps they are having much fun with your other two friends and ignored you because you are quiet? Being with friends is to have fun, you could temporarily forget about your troubles and have a laugh so try to speak up and dun be lazy if you want something you have to work hard for it^^

and the girlfriend part, you probably havent foung the right girl yet, if the person loves you they will accept for who you are, didna care if you have some sort of problem. i use to be very introvert but being with the right friends and the right people open me up.

AND i would think that you shouldnt eat too mush of those pills its bad, might be adding on to your depression, overdose ya noe ^^

Answer 9

some people just prefer to be quiet- not everyone was born an in-your-face chatterbox. you are good. just do what makes you feel good- & dont do what makes you feel bad & thats it-

Answer 10

My guess is you also have the following habits:

1. Remember things from a long time ago

2. Summarize events that happened to you

3. Do not feel open or understandable to your family, or friends

I talked about those 3 things so that you notice that in yourself. But you do not have to worry. I suggest you look for some of your own strengths, and find opportunities to use them to help others. If you experience more, you may become looser about making mistakes, about being imperfect. In short, develop yourself and help others.

Answer 11

Sounds like to me you have Self-esteem issues. You can't spend your life worring about what other people might think of you. You have to be you. Once you gain that confidence, people will be more drawn to you. Confidence in a man is VERY attractive to most women. You can't be afraid to be yourself. Take small steps though, don't try to rush into any type of situation, give yourself small goals, go to a little coffee shop, take a book, or a magazine and just hang out with yourself. Dont sit WAY back in the corner, but Dont sit right in the pathway of were EVERYBODY walks in.

BE YOURSELF!!! If somebody doesn't like you for something you said, or the clothes you wear, than F*ck em'. Who are they to pass judgement.  

Answer 12

Honestly from what I've heard from many people with depression and on anti depressants is that they really only make matters worse. I'd try it on your own for a bit, which sounds incrediblely difficult I'm sure but it's not as hard as people think. Anti depressants will only make you more lazy, tired, and drained, which most certainly won't help you. As for the girlfriend don't stress out about not having one right now, that's the least of your worries.No one can really tell you what's wrong and how to fix it, you just need to try slowly forcing yourself into bigger groups, of course in a slow manner of doing so, until you begin to feel less anxious and more comfortable. It's basically the same method with fears, the more you introduce it in your life the more less prone you become to them.

Sorry that I wasn't of much help, it's your choice on what to do. Also keep in mind, I'm not a therapist, counsler, or anything of that nature. h**l I'm not even old enough to drive so really what does my opinion matter huh?

Good luck and I hope things get better.

Answer 13

Listen bud, let me tell you, i had the same problem im a year younger, not as excessive as you. but this is  allllllllllllllllllllllllll  age man. Give it some time. lay off the meds, trust me. Go work out, and if you get a gf itll help you socialize mucccccch better.  

Answer 14

It's sad that a doctor would prescribe drugs to anyone younger than 18. Sounds like all you need is cardiovascular excercise.

Answer 15

i think your just so wrapped up in the thought of depression you cant get out of it focus on things you like not other people or what they think find your favorite healthy legal thing to do and get addicted aka a hobby and forget about the depression if you dwell on it then it will just get worse