So fed up should i leave him?

Question

i have been with a man for about three years now but the issues are he is not the same person i fell in love with back then.at the time we met we were both married i got a divorce from my ex husband while i was pregnant with his child i did this because i wanted to be with the man i am with now.after all this time he still have not got his divorce and now his three kids live with us and i am the one that takes care of them everyday cause he is a truck driver so he is gone all week long and comes in on the week end.his wife calls his cell phone all times of the night ant not to talk to the kids cause they are sleep he say she do it cause she know it will make me mad and we will argue about it.i keep a very clean house i take care of his three kids ages 4,6,and 7 along with my two ages 1 and 11. i wash fold and put away his cloths and comb hair cook dinner all while i work a full time job as a cna so i have to get up at 5:30 in the morning.i think he just has no respect for what i do.please tell me what to do. please

Answer 1

I think you are feeling insecure because you divorced your husband to be with this man and he is still married, but you have all the responsibilities of a wife and none of the respect or a committment from him. It's obvious he can't commit because he is still married.  So I would pack up my things, and get out, and when he loses the free babysitter, housekeeper, and cook, maybe he will have some respect for you and the sacrifices you make for him on a daily basis.I am sure you are struggling with guilt because you won't be there to care for his children whom you have probably grown close to while caring for them, but let him see what he can do without you and tell him to call his wife maybe she can help him figure out what to do.

Answer 2

ummm let me clean up this one sentence

"I got a divorce from my HUSBAND while I was pregnant with HIS(other guys) child"

just wanted to straighten that one out.

oh yeah btw...this is called Karma. by way of a relationships foundation being built by way of cheating

goodluck. GOD is still waiting btw

Mona mon - you are indeed a smart woman who sees the big picture. your man must be proud.

Answer 3

Girl if her were serious about you...and loved you...He would have divorced his wife already....He is using you...and you are allowing yourself to be used....Do you and your children a huge favor and leave this man...after all he is still legally married to another woman....

Answer 4

Looks like you literally screwed yourself and succumbed to your passions. Why would you marry the first guy anyway? Now you are unhappy with the baggage? Come on girl...You made your bed..now you have to sleep in it...You created this masterpiece...now deal with...Take Care and be blessed.

Answer 5

Karma sucks, doesn't it?

It's pretty simple.  If you're unhappy, leave him.  If you can live with the situation you've put yourself in then stay.

Answer 6

Ask yourself this:

What is it that you want from him?

Don't ask strangers what you should do. Especially when you don't know what it is that you want.

Otherwise you will probably leave this guy. And you will find your self another married guy, and have a 3rd child doing the same thing you are doing now.

Sit down at lunch today, and ask write it down:

What do I want?

What do I want from him?

Then sit with him and show him what you wrote, and work it out.

Pretty darn simple, ya?

Or encourage him to get back with his ex, and you get back with your ex

all of those kids are young and need a lot of hugs and kisses by someone that loves them.

Answer 7

YOU NEED TO LEAVE!  I would NOT put up with this.  I would give him an ultimatum.  He gets a lawyer to draw up divorce papers in the next 2 weeks or I would leave and take your 2 kids.  He needs to show respect for you and how hard you are working....& taking care of his kids.  If he cannot see everything you are doing for him, I would leave.  You deserve better.  It is ridiculous that he will not get a divorce, even though he is living with you and you are taking care of his kids.  Don't put up with this c**p!  Good Luck!

Answer 8

This is what you wanted.  You wanted to be with this man and this man came with 3 kids and a not so ex wife.  I guess you could leave him (and who could blame you, you work like an animal), but try and remember the reason you uprooted your entire life to be with this man. There must've been something that made you take such a risk.  

By the way, I hate your life.

Answer 9

I hate to say this but it's kind of like karma is biting you in the rear you should have been faithful to your husband this guy is a jerk and you let yourself be taken in by the greener grass on the other side theory.

Answer 10

It sounds like they were both in search of a life, that doesn't or didn't involve their own kids. So, your probably being used as a free sitter.

IF this man cared about you, he'd get a different number and this would stop her from calling.

I couldn't handle raising anothers children, why neither parent, him nor her are in their lives.

I'd leave.