So is she trying to get back at me or what,woman please answer?

Question

so my ex wife picks a fight for anything that goes wrong in her eyes.some times for really stupid things.its not just me noticing it.everybody i know who hears about it or experiences it says she is in the wrong.but she was mad as usual because i didn't do what she told me to do when i had my kid.so she always picks up the kid on time.but today she picked up the kid an hour late.never said or explained why.i think it was a way to try to pi$$ me off but it didn't work.i.e. she bugged me for a long time to spend more time with kid.when i had the opportunity to do so she backed out on it.what is her issue?i know your going to say its a control issue.but why?i pay my c/s and see my kid like I'm supposed to.and i give her extra money when i don't have to.

Answer 1

thats messed up

Answer 2

she sounds crazy dude.stalking u on the internet thats a little weird. but maybe she is trying to get back ask her why is she so vendictive.  

Answer 3

Quit telling "everybody" about it and know that there is nothing that you can do.  I suppose she is hurt and/or angry.  I don't know if the two of you would be willing to go to family counseling to learn how to work together for the good of the child.  Doesn't sound like she would be but it couldn't hurt to ask.

My folks fought worse after the divorce than they did while they were married and it was awful on us kids.  We really learned how to be hateful.  This is what your kid is going to get from the two of you and you can't just blame the ex-wife.  You had a hand in getting her this angry, you need to do whatever it takes to get her back to the woman you used to know.  I am not suggesting you try to get back together just that you try to get a more peaceful relationship going.

If that is not possible then maybe you need a common place to drop of the child and then for her to pick them up so that you two have as little contact as possible.  A relatives home, a common friend, school or childcare.  You drop them off, she picks them up or vise verse.

Bottom line, your child needs you two adults to start behaving like adults, whatever it takes.

Answer 4

She sounds immature, but you should just carry on and remain civil for the kids sake really, thats about all you can do really.

Answer 5

Does "the kid" have a name? You make the child sound like an object and not someone you love. She is bitter and is going to try to make your life h**l. Did you cheat? Does she blame you for the divorce? The reason shouldn't be that hard to find. You should ask her why she is so hateful and see what she says.

Answer 6

She just wants to get on your nerves! Keep doing what your doing - don't let her get to you- thats what she wants- she sounds like someone who loves drama!  

Answer 7

wow your ex is mean i would stay calm as long as possible shes just trying to get at you  forget about her focus on your kid  

Answer 8

Just don't let her use the child as a weapon against you.  Instead of giver her extra money put it in an account for your child so when she really wants something special you can start to teach her the value of a dollar.  Your wife is being vengeful, and her only control over you is the child.  If she keeps it up you may have a reason to go to child services, and request custody, for the well being of your child.  The X maybe unstable and dangerous!  

Answer 9

This is a syndrome that is unfortunately affecting many people.  Mostly men......experience the unhappy ex.  Apparently you have moved on, are happy and she is trying to make you feel as unhappy as she is or wishes that you were.  I don't fully understand it, however it happens at our house also with my husbands ex wife...it has gotten less severe over the years, however....she is jealous that he has moved on and didn't shrivel up and die when they divorced.  I am writing a book - a handbook for men after divorce and topics like this one you brought up, because unfortunately the judicial system has become unbalanced and these unhappy people make make life a judicial h**l for the ex husband with lies they can tell....come between the ex and the children etc..etc..etc..  Good luck.

Answer 10

yes, is a control issue and manipulation why/ because women feel loved by the other person doing what is said to be done. and since you dont ask, dont interact w/ her and she has no control over you - then shes acting childish. Just continue w/ your C/S and nothing more - and be there for your kids regardless  !

Answer 11

She's unhappy with her life.    

Answer 12

Do you have a woman in your life that your ex knows about. Sounds like she is "hatin" you for more than one reason. No, she is not trying to get back at you....She Is getting the best of your attention/anger/whatever. All you can do is ignor her and do not entertain her by arguing about anything. You did right to not ask her why she was late. This would just feed her ego. Continue to love your kids and do for them direct. Don't do extra to her for them. Do it yourself. Make your self less available at times of inconvience and stick to your guns.  

Answer 13

Riley said it right. She feels unsettled and unhappy and since misery loves company, she is trying to control your emotions. Don't give her anything to push against. It takes two to argue, fight and have conflict. You stay on the high road and pray for your child's Mom.

Answer 14

she's angry.sometimes woman try to be cold when they dont want to show their emotions.she's angry and hurt about the devorse so she's being extra bi*chy and cold so u dont see her hurting,she doesnt want u to think she cares.that's why.