So why? To parents, adults?

Question

When your kids were or are little, you always tell them they can be anyone they want as long as you work hard for i, or something like that. But when they become teens, you always restrict them from wearing clothes they want, having their they want.. etc. So why?

Especially when they're goth, emo/scene, punk...

I'm just curious.. (Doesn't apply to all)

=]

Answer 1

because nothing good will come out of being goth or emo or punk or whatever c**p. working hard means studying hard, finding nice job and getting more money, cos in that case u can afford whatever u want and u gain some respect. all those goth and other bulls'''''hit looks ridiculous

Answer 2

Boundaries are important, and to be able to do anything you want anytime anywhere or what ever.

Sorry , but we are judged by appearance, I'm overweight and dress nice, but that doesn't matter because I'm 20 lbs overweight. Tall also and asking if I can breathe up there isn't nice.

What I am getting at sweetie, I'm gonna be62 in Dec. and it doesn't make me a happy camper, but had my life ran by others most of my life.

No man is an island

I find long hair beautiful, on male or female.

Answer 3

gonna take a guess that your parents arent worried about the clothing but 'the actions' of the teen in the clothing.  

Answer 4

Because nobody likes goth kids and because by wearing those clothes they are leading themselves down a path of self-destruction and hatred of themselves and everyone else, and then they will never be successful

Answer 5

Nope....didn't do it....You cannot be anyone you want....I do not want my kids to be a doper, or druggie, or a loser....

Kids NEED boundaries....and believe it or not...really want parents that are involved....it shows that they are loved...as opposed to those parents who allow anything!

Answer 6

Not the same things kiddo, you are confusing aspirations with breaking taboos in society.

As children a good parent will encourage their offspring to try new subjects and different skills, even if they appear not to have any aptitude.  Raising aspirations will allow individuals to succeed.

Society is a consensual force, we all agree on certain rules (murder and rape is bad) sometimes this changes (murder in a battle situation is OK, or even commendable).  Anyhow, the point is that these rules are agreed by a group, not an individual.  That is why rules change over time and in different societies.  

All the young need to rebel, that is how a society refines itself and laws mores and norms change.  i personally like Goth/Emo and encourage my teenagers to partake.  Except at school, where their lives will be easier if they conform.  

I believe that part of being a good parent is to give your child the tools to be able to judge what battles are winnable and when to conform.  

Answer 7

I think kids should be left to explore and dress the way they like. I think mostly people think that because you dress a certain way that you may be into drugs or something that is not legal! Don't worry about it. Just wear what you want!

Answer 8

Becoming what you want has nothing to do with wearing black nail polish, it's about your education and career prospects. The same way your wouldn't want you to become a drug addict, maybe you should pay more attention to your question. Your question says 'if you work hard for it,' does it really take a lot of hard work to become an emo or punk. I don't think so...  

Answer 9

Parents just want to protect you. I know it sounds harsh (and i only just worked this out, i'm 30+) but my parents know more than me!!!! I know! They did everything i did, and have experienced most of what i did (and so have yours, drugs, gangbangs, everything, plus marriage, kids, divorce etc.)  They just want to protect and help you.

The big thing about having kids is you don't want them to have the hard times you did. They love you and want to help.

edit. Dress exactly how you want. Your parents don't really care that you wear purple lipgloss, just that you are happy while doing it.

Answer 10

My mom doesn't like the look, so I respect her wishes in her home, but it is how I feel comfortable. I think we restrict our children on what they can wear, because how they look or appear in public often reflects on us as parents. Other people still judge us as parents for the way they look. Now that I'm almost 33, I still respect my mom, but in the privacy of my own home or with my family I do as I please. Most of how we dress or appear comes off as respect to ourselves and the people we effect or those around us. I encourage our sons to choose their own clothing and I support them in their choices. If something doesn't look right then I point it out and tell them why it doesn't look right, but I leave the choice to change it up to them. They are making a statement about themselves. I dress goth, but I do it in a classy way so as not to disrespect myself, my husband or my children. Actions speak differently than the clothes we wear. One can wear the clothing, but still be respectful about ones self. I dress goth, but I'm no druggie by any means. I'm allergic to most drugs out there anyway, so drugs are not an option, and I teach my children the importance of not doing drugs because you can have the off chance that you might be allergic to them, which has bitter consequences. =)