Social Effects ...?

Question

You know I hear alot about home schooling and how it's good for the minds but being smart is one part of the overall picture. What about the social aspect of life? Prepairing children to be members of a society. How do you substitute the social interactions that are great learning tools for the life they will eventually lead outside when mom and dad are not around? I mean do home schoolers ignore this aspect of life? Are non-home schoolers wrong in thinking that the lack of in school interaction decreases one's abilities socially? Do you let your kids go out more so that they get what they are not getting had they been in school? I've always been through the public school system and I feel like it has made me more of a go getter and that perhaps I would have been more of a meek person withou those interactions. I am not condemning what you do, I just want to know what you guys feel about this.

Answer 1

I do not homeschool, but I heavily considered it for a while and was actively involved in a homeschooling group.  I also have family members who homeschool.  I think it can be done effectively and the right children can really thrive.  There's just nothing that can compete with that hands on, 1:1 learning with a parent or learning in such a small group where children have much more freedom and opportunity to explore and communicate what they are thinking.  I think it CAN be very beneficial given the right set up and the right personality mix.  However, having said that, I will say that I don't think it's the best for kids socially.  Not inasmuch as they don't get social interaction, because the kids I know who are homeschooled are participants of a number of different groups where they get plenty of interaction.  It's just that, in my opinion, homeschooled kids in general do not get to learn the social expectations of what is learned in the classroom.  At school, you HAVE to get up, follow a routine, be somewhere at a certain time everyday, do activities that you may not find interesting, respect authority figures other than your parents, follow rules that may not make sense to you -- you're part of a larger group and you have to learn how to funciton and find your place within that group.  That's just how we learn to adapt to the world!  Sometimes I have to get up and do things I don't particularly want to do, work with people I don't like, etc. that's just life....school is good training for this.  Is it the ONLY training?  No.  Is it the best and most effective?  Well, I just think it's the easiest and most effective because that's what MOST people do.  Good for you for checking it out and really giving it thought. I think it's great for some, but it's not for everyone...

Answer 2

I am a home schooling parent and this was a concern when we made the choice to home school. The truth is that school is only a small part of a child's social development and not always the most positive part. The home is always the first place a child learns social skills as they interact with parents and siblings and learn basic manners and coping skills. As they get older they will interact with peers through sports, clubs, scouts, church and countless other activities. These kinds of interactions often expose children to a much broader circle of people from many age groups and economic levels. This helps them to feel comfortable in any social situation.

Answer 3

Well I am a home school-er I am In 8Th Grade so In Jr. High.

I have the option to go to have a day at the public Jr. high for the fun classes to get more socializing. But I am very out going I still hang with my friends after school, and on the weekends. I am still the Little blond popular girl at school even though i am not there. If that makes sense. If you kids are little just make play dates for them with other home schooled children or have the public school kids come over after there school. No home schooled kids aren't UN-social, Well At least not me! I am Way  Out going and social and know how to handle myself in the world. That is why I am doing home school. I am An actress And I cannot go to the schools Regular Hrs. I need a flexible School, So I do an on-line school. I works great for me I am ahead and I am going to Graduate Early And I already Have My career Going.

Answer 4

Homeschooling does mean that the child will be isolated, and Public School does not assure healthy social development.  I have seen kids in public school be bullied and picked on to the point that they retreat inside of themselves and never really come out and began to trust people again.

It all depends on the individual child, the family and many other factors.

Socialization is not a problem for most homeschoolers that live in urban areas. There are kids in the neighborhood, there are clubs and after school activities, part time jobs, and many other opportunities for social interaction.

For rural homeschoolers it can be a little more challenging.  My family lives in a rural area, and we have to make a real effort to provide opportunities for our homeschooled kids.  We participate in a homeschool co-op for the younger kids, and for my teen we are currently looking into 4-H.  

My teen used to go to boys and girls clubs, but she found it boring because they usually only sat around playing board games.  On occasion they would do other things, but all in all it wasn't very exiting and she felt she had better things to do with her time.  She also goes to Youth Group at our church.  We are looking into 4-H now because * I * feel she needs more social interaction, as well as more goals and motivation in her life.  *She* is satisfied with things as they are, but I really want to see her start to interact, to set goals and work to meet them, to broaden her horizons.  So next year she will join 4-H, she will also start volunteering at the humane society and possibly at the food bank.

Social interaction can be a challenge for some homeschool families, for others it is not an issue at all.  Even for those who find it challenging, I believe it is a challenge that can be overcome with effort.

Public school could offer easy social interaction.  The problem is that also offers many negatives.  Depending on the schools in your area, it may offer a second-rate academic experience, guns, drugs, and gangs.  Even in our small rural community, a kid once brought a gun to the Junior High School, and was planning to use it, but fortunately for everyone else, he accidentally shot his own foot taking the gun out of his pants! (LOL)

The social environment in school is also very different from the one adults experience day to day, so I question how well it prepares kids for the adult world.

Answer 5

I have one question for you. What do you (or your kids) do during summer vacation?

Unless you are very unusual, your answer includes a lot of very social things, in spite of, (or, more likely, because of) not being in 'school' for 6 hours a day.

More people who are smarter and more experienced than I will come and answer this question, but the short version is that:

1. Homeschooled kids get a lot of social interaction.

2. The social interaction of homeschoolers is a lot more like 'real life' than the artificial school environment.

3. Non-homeschoolers have the completely false impression that homeschool parents basically lock their kids away, but this is no more common than other types of abuse that kids (regardless of type of educational system) experience.

4. School often teaches bad social skills, e.g. putting up with a bully (called 'domestic violence' in the real world) and hiding one's intelligence.

Oh, and I just recently judged in a speech and debate tournament where the competitors where homeschoolers. I have never been so impressed in my life with young teens in terms of outgoing-ness, politeness, kindness toward one another, intelligence, and desire of younger kids to emulate the older ones.

Answer 6

I am a home schooling parent. We have watched our children interact with public school kids and kids in other home schooling groups. Our kids were literally treated as outcasts in public schools and were doing terribly. Classmates of theirs would talk over the teacher, text in class, talk about which girl was hot, or outright become a disruptive influence.

Since we have taken them out of public schools, their grades have skyrocketed a great deal. They prefer the quiet fully educational environment over the disruptive one any day.

Our youngest son brought up a great point one day. If public school kids' only concern is socialization, then where does their education come in? What is more important to a public school kid, education or socialization?

JayWalking with Jay Leno is a great example. He asked several college students who lives at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue. She couldn't answer. But when Jay asked her who lived in a pineapple under the sea she responded with Sponge Bob. My 11 year old and 15 year old sons know who lives at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue.

Ask a public school kid the following questions and wait for the answers.

1. What was General George Crook's Starvation March?

2. Who was Dr. Charles Drew and what was his contribution to modern medical science?

3. Who was the inventor of penicillin?

4. What is the deepest indentation in the earth?

5. Where is the geographical center to the United States?

6. Who discovered Radium?

Many public school kids are merely concerned with who was at the party last week, who's in bed with who, who has the coolest car or the coolest IPod, IPhone, or cell phone.

Answer 7

Agree with person who says this question comes up all the time...but only in Y!A.  I our face to face life it is not a question that anyone would ask our family or any of our homeschool friends.

Our son is at the movies right now with a girl  that he met at the fair back in October.   Earlier today, after he did his homeschool work, he met with some friends who go to public school  who are out on spring break.   The phone rings constantly and the internet instant messages stay active with friends who want to chat or make plans.

So, the lack of being cooped up in a classroom with people his exact age has not caused him to be anti-social.

Answer 8

This question comes up all the time.

Here is our 12 year old's schedule...which is open to change at any time:

Monday, Park Day (with other homeschoolers, a national movement),  art, and Tae Kwan Do classes

Tuesday: Science classes, sewing class ,volunteering at Tae Kwan Do school

Wednesday - Play with friends, trip to library, Tae Kwan Do class

Thursday - More science classes, more volunteering, Tae Kwan Do class

Friday - Horseback riding lessons, play with friends, Tae Kwan Do class.

As you can see, my child is not lacking for social experiences.

We are typical homeschoolers, btw.

Answer 9

I was homeschooled for a while myself, and I am 16. Im a very social person, so it wasnt really working for me so I switched to public schooling. I think that parents that have been homeschooling their children implement some kind of social activity to replace the social experiences they would have normally recieved in public school. But I think if your child is envolved in community events and things like that it really wont matter.

Answer 10

I homeschooled K-12 and when people asked me if I ever wanted to go to school I tell them I did not have time for school! Here is what I did every week for most of my K-12 years:

3-4 dance classes

Volunteer work

Church ministry/activities

Violin lesson

Violin Group lesson

Piano lessons

Study groups with other homeschoolers

Play dates with homeschooler and public schoolers

Art class

Campaigning (during election years)

College classes(during high school at the community college)

Library/reading group

Played/hung out with neighborhood kids

Talked to my best friends for at least one hour on the phone (everyday)

Clubs, camps, workshops (mostly during the summer)

I teach private violin lessons and I cannot tell you how 'weird' I find most of my public schooled students.  Most of them give me one-word answers no matter what the question is, they never want their parents there, they talk about how much they hate school, they are not friends with this person anymore, they are around the same age group everyday, all day long, and seriously, who can blame them?  They are probably bored out of their mind.  I would have gone crazy if my parents had sent me to school.  Luckily they did not and I had the time participate in all those activites on a regular basis.  I was more social being homeschooled than I ever would have been as a public schooler.

Answer 11

Whether you are homeschooled or go to public school need not determine if you are shy or confidant, etc.  I attended public schools growing up, and I was always shy (still am, to a degree).  

I think that my homeschooled children have a better chance to socialize than they would if they attended school.  Instead of being grouped with others born the same year they were, they learn with and from people of all ages.  They are involved in more extracurricular activities than we would have time for if they were in school.  And, really-I was always told I was NOT at school to socialize.  

It is not like your children are socializing for 8 hours a day at school-they have the three-five minutes between classes when they are rushing to get their books from the locker and get to the other side of the building.  They have perhaps half an hour at lunch.  You get the idea.

We do not ignore socialization-we embrace it and the fact that homeschooling allows us more opportunities for it.

I hope this helps answer your question.

Answer 12

"How do you substitute the social interactions that are great learning tools for the life they will eventually lead outside when mom and dad are not around?"

Why substitute? Why not allow for great social interactions that educate and inform? That is what my child receives through homeschool. Social interactions are not limited to the classrooms and hallways of public schools. IMO, my child gets more interaction that is applicable to real life after graduation by homeschooling. She is not locked away or a social pariah. She is a part of her community. Ask yourself which is a better model for her social interactions: a room of 20 to 30 of her juvenile peers and one teacher, or her parents and community members of all ages?