Some one make sense of what i am doing please?

Question

i've noticed a while ago that when i have pressing issues on my mind i do everything but go to sleep. in the past my room was next to my parents so i ***** stay up as they would notice so id try to sleep, think myself into a hole and cry all night-my life suks btw and iv been an insomniac for 5years due to it.

now iv moved up to the loft, have a laptop and now even wen im very tired i stay on all night watchin tv in bed on my laptop so as not to think and dont "let myself" go to sleep until my mind becomes too exhausted from staying up that it has to sleep. This way 'when im done' im too tired to think and fall asleep as soon as i hit the pillow.

Bet u know what the worst part of that is..yep the next morning i cant get up until 12 and spend my day moody and even more depressed as i think it too late to make much of the day so i stay at home-my friends are a******s and r never there wen i need them. so i do this until night comes again and cycle repeats itself.

im aware of what im doing- i just cant stop. i hate my mind so much and after 8 years of putting up with its depressed state i dont want to deal with it. i hate this new routine as well though, so im in a lose-lose situation the thing is, id rather do this than to have to lie in bed and try to sleep cz thats how the thinking starts since im an insomniac.

doctor, pills, done it all i feel so fukd up and i know exactly why but that doesnt help.

Answer 1

I recommend taking a hit of heroin while sitting up in bed.

If that doesn't work, stop being an idiot and go get some xanax and rozerem dummy.

Answer 2

SO UNDERSTAND THE RIDE THAT YOUR ON:(  it sucks!!!  Sleep is so important and when you don't have any life is pretty unmanageable.  It sounds like to me you have some type of mood disorder and the only way that is going to get better is with some sleep.  You really should go back and try again with the doctor again.  I know sometimes those drugs really suck that the doctor gives you, but maybe you just haven't found the right drug therapy for you.  There are tons of great drugs out there, investigate.    Good luck, and get some sleep.  

Answer 3

Hi, I hope you manage to resolve this soon. Trying to force yourself to sleep does not work. If you are not tired, do something - anything. Get up (if you can - parents perhaps an issue) & do some housework, read, do hobbies, watch TV, pass time on PC, surf this site even, but do something to tire you out. Doing things until you are too tired to think is no bad thing. Try winding down earlier though and cut down (preferrably cut out) caffiene - It keeps me awake all night until I need to get up that is. Milk helps too as it contains natural relaxants, dope & heroin do not!! Could you try reading a book? Not necessarily a classic, just something that lets you focus on a different angle on life. I like travel books as they let me escape. Moderate exercise or a change of diet may also help. Physical exercise releases endorphins in your brain which are natural pain killers and relaxants - a free and healthy chill!! Most of all - don't get too hung up about it. It sounds like you are pretty normal but just need some way of relaxing at the end of a day. If the depression is a major issue though you would be best to see a doctor to talk things through. Best of luck & hopefully you are now half asleep after reading this lengthy reply I have posted !!!  

Answer 4

I really think you may be bi-polar.The mind issue sounds so familiar to me.Your hiding out because your days messed up-too late.I really think you should make an appt to see a good shrink.In the meantime start writing everything you think or do on paper.Date it all .Take this when you see the Doc.It will give them an idea of how your minds working.I went through 8+ years of being mis diagnosed.Even told to "get over it".My current shrink figured what was wrong with me.it does take awhile to get the correct meds,but,it WILL happen.I'll be praying for you,ok?.Go see a good Doc and I promise youll be better in no time-as opposed to years!,E

Answer 5

For the depression, you probably need help. Talk to a therapist, a family member, an internet friend, whatever.

I was an insomniac from as young as I can remember until I was 18. I would just lay there and everything would keep swirling around in my head and if any of it was bad it just gotten even worse.

I started laying down in bed in dark/silence and close my eyes and picture a long hallway with rooms on either side. At the end of the hall is a light switch.

I walk down the hallway and look in each room. They all contain a thought that is sticking with me keeping me from sleeping. I assure myself that there is nothing to be done about this, and shut the door. I do this, room to room until the end, where I shut of the switch.

Anymore, it's gotten better to the point that I'm usually out before I finish. :)

There's a trick out there that will work for you.

btw - for the guy who said smoke weed: that's all good for some people, but I know people who's anxiety levels skyrocket after smoking.

Answer 6

okay dont listen to the jerks who say to start taking drugs, thats such a bad idea.  And youd have soo many more problems if you did that.  So I have to say that it sounds like your really depressed.  Depression can definetally cause insomnia.  Im not sure what you mean when you said youve done it all, including doctors.  Does that mean psychiatric doctors or regular, go to them when you feel sick doctors?  If you havent seen a counselor or therapist, you ought to consider it.  They really help.  Anyways, you sound kind of young, like teenage years, so if your still in school, the first thing you should think about doing is talking to your counselor or maybe your parents or someone?  Good luck sweetie!!