To all considerate people on Yahoo answers, I am sure some of you might’ve heard my tale before. I am a young father of a 3 year-old son. For the past 4 years, I have been in a relationship with this young woman from Tennessee, when I found out she was pregnant, I was happy, motivated and surprised but I took on the role of a responsible father, I had to grow up pretty quick, I’ve managed school and work and the role of a father quickly. I’ve asked her to marry me, but she never wanted to and said she would have her single parent’s check taken away. This family was everything to me, I loved her and my son so dearly, they were my treasures. Back in April, everything fell apart, during that month, she was acting ambivalent and really nasty, picking fights, breaking time shared, ignoring, totally disconnecting with me. Until one day, after a night out till 7 in the morning, that particular afternoon, she made the decision of separating, that she couldn’t live with me anymore, that I was a terrible person to be with, everything was my fault. I was devastated and shocked, I blamed everything to myself….She told me : “I want to experience New York City lifeâ€Â. I thought I should give her some time and space to think about things and let her be. She moved out within two days and said she has found an apartment, not talking or seeing me. I was wondering how she was able to do all this, after 4 years and life planned together.
After talking to a few friends of mine, they have told me, “Considering the speed and audacities of this situation and conditions, buddy, you might want to take a third party in considerations.†I checked out her t-mobile plan, she has been talking to a particular young man, a break-dancer from Japan her age since March. My heart collapsed and as if a knife stabbed me. I couldn’t believe it. Since then I’ve been trying to move on but still, it is a nightmare that one shall constantly live in. The pain doesn’t end, although things are getting better. There was a period of time when I compared myself to him, what made her chose him before me? Is this guy really more important than us? This family? It was unfair, if she chose on the grounds of interesting things, I could’ve done more interesting things considering I am much younger, if she wanted fun and games, I could’ve did all that, even better. But I couldn’t, we had a child together. I wanted to straighten everything out. My self-esteem was low, I couldn’t live with myself, I felt like I’ve failed everyone including my son. Still, until this day, I feel as if I still feel awfully depressed and sad about the whole thing.
To make things worse, one day she picked up this guy in my car and pick up my son from my house. I gave up a thumbs up, but went in my house crying, also, last night, as I was going out for a run, I got the child support papers in my mailbox. My questions are these…How can someone do this? Not considering the feelings and the changes that is forever within people? Is this what I get for being responsible? I worked incredibly hard and this is what I get in return. For stepping up to the plate for her and my son? For doing what I had to do? For loving her and wanting good things for her and my son? If she wants to experience New York City life, then leave my son here with me while she flies off with this guy. This is definitely not the way I want to raise my beautiful son, but I’ve realized I have no other way. I need to have hope again. To anyone who read this, I am truly grateful of that there are people out there
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