Soon to be army wife. Advice?

Question

On deployments, anything.

Answer 1

Growing up in a military family, I've learned something.

While your husband is deployed overseas, don't talk about all the drama at home, he has a job to worry about over there, he doesn't need to be distracted by things happening at home at the same time.

Answer 2

Support him as much as possible, tell him you love him 100's of times a day

and another thing about what someone said about do not have guy friends, that is bullcrap in a chef salad, i have all guy friends because of the fact they dont gossip. Sure other people do try to say i cheat on my husband but i just ignore them, only i know the truth and my husband trusts me, you cant have love if you dont have trust.

I dont know what the heck it means to not wear your husbands rank considering I am refered to all the time as PFC Kingmans Wife by all of the Sgt.s I know.

My best advice is, especially when moving on post, ignore all the gossip, dont pass along rumors, and try to make as many friends as you can with other military familys. which explains why i have alot of guy friends, their wives are cool dont get me wrong but i grew up as a tomboy and i just get along with them more.

Answer 3

dont do it, he will end up cheating and so will you,  

Answer 4

Hi. I am also a wife of an army personnel. Just be supportive for him and pray for his safety where ever he goes.  Always...remember to send him loving notes via mails or emails to make him feel good and think of safety to be with you soon.  Blessing to you and him.

Answer 5

Being previously deployed, I would say the best thing you can do as an Army wife is to help handle all his personal affairs while he's away.  Pay the bills, keep his and your family updated on his status.  Send him a few care packages every now and then and keep the faith.  The more you can do for him means the less things he has to worry about while away.  I deployed back in 2004 and I still tell my wife thank you for being such a big help back then.

Answer 6

Make sure your really supportive about everything he decides to do, or has to do. Tell him your proud of him all the time, and just be there for him all you can, and make sure theres plenty of trust in the relationship or that will cause issues. And talk to each other a lot, and about everything

Answer 7

Army life is hard. I grew up as an Army brat. My dad's a 1SG now. But I'm 24 now. He's about to make SGM, but my mom wants him to get OUT. Army life is hard, especially for the wife and kids left behind. My das has been in the field for months at a time, several times a year. Not to mention deployments are getting even longer than they used to be, and even more often. My guy wants to join again, I'm trying to push him towards Reserves. I don't want to go through what I went through as a child and what my mom goes through. Then the constant moving. Yes, you get to see places. But what kids like to lose friends every couple years? I didn't. It actually traumatized me.

Answer 8

My first advice would be to learn as much as you can about the Army. From the phonetic alphabet to rank structure to acronyms. If you dont, you wont understand a dang thing. When your husband says "I need a copy of my ERB" you need to know what that means without him explaining it. Understand his LES, know what orders look like. Know everything you CAN about the Army and you will make your life easier, and his too. Care about his work, care about other soldiers and their families, care about the Army.

Be flexible and patient. You can never be guaranteed what time he gets off work, when he deploys, when he redeploys, when he goes in to work, when he goes to school, and you DANG sure cant control it. What you CAN control is how you respond. So be patient, kind, understanding, and loving. Welcome him home every day with open arms and a kiss.

There are many things you can get advice on (I gave you a few things), but other things, like patience and understanding, well if you dont have patience or understanding, you better work at it. Good luck to you and welcome to the family. We ARE a family, and I hope you feel like you are part of one. Contribute to the family in every way you can, even if it is turning around and giving advice based on your experience. Take care and feel free to IM or email with questions.

Answer 9

Just take it one day at a time. Things will change constantly and you can't plan for anything. But you do learn to appreciate the time you have together. You learn to appreciate the little things.

Have a positive attitude. Think of it all as an adventure rather than an inconvenience.

Get involved in the military community right away-- take the courses offered and learn what you can. Get involved with your FRG. Knowledge is power.

Have a life outside of your husband-- go to work, school, volunteer, become active in your community, find a hobby, surround yourself with good friends, etc. It's really important to be able to find happiness without depending on your husband.

Answer 10

Love has little to do with military infidelity, trust me.

Alcohol, separation and opportunity have more of an effect.

Advice?

First off, don't run home to mama everytime he leaves. If you're gonna do this for 20 years you better learn to do it alone, especially seeing how McCain wants us in Iraq for 100 years.

Don't make "guy friends" and don't hang out with men while your husband is gone. It's disrespectful and it will make you a target for gossip

Don't wear your husband's rank. That's lame. It's his not yours. Get a life of your own.

Learn to budget on a limited income.

Get to know other Army wives. They're the coolest, strongest women you'll ever meet and you'll learn to appreciate diversity.

Don't shop at the commissary on payday.

Don't isolate yourself during a deployment. Get out of the house and do something productive.

Answer 11

my boyfriend is in iraq right now and it sucks.. you probably have already had to deal with that but its hard, i hardely ever get to talk to him, if im lucky once a week..

i just try to keep myself occupied and try not to think about what he is doing obviously i still think about him a lot though.. just show him he has your support and love and he doesnt need to worry about what is at home.

not gonna lie i hate the army now haha

my dad was in the marines too and it was really hard on us growing up cause he wasnt there a whole lot.. but my dad always showed us he cared and appreciated how we were there for him and willing..

but good luck with everything, your marriage and him being gone so much and everything..

Answer 12

watch army wives ( the episodes ) you might be able to relate to it someway ???