Starting the adoption process... any advice?

Question

I want to adopt through the children's aid society. I've already called them and they're going to send me the information. What should I expect with the home inspection?

I am not willing to adopt from another country simply because I know that their are kids in Canada that need good homes as well. I am not racist, so please do not say anything to me along those lines.

Only mature answers please.

Thanks

Answer 1

One of the best things to do, is spend sometime in the library looking for current books on adoption. Home inspections are to make certain what type of home you're going to give a child. My wife and I adopted a boy and girl many years ago, the library was where we found alot of information on the different types and ways of adoption. The amount of time you spend now getting information, will help you avoid problems in the future.

When we picked up our son, the lady that was caring for him wrote a poem, not of my blood, not of bone, not under my heart, but always in my heart and thoughts forever. There is no greater gift to give yourself and a child if you're not able to give birth to a child than adoption.

Some people like to call it racist when people want to adopt certain children only, but your family will be the ones taking care of that child needs until the child is ready to face the world.

Answer 2

Canadian requirements may be different that US requirements, however, in the state of Maryland, here are some of the things we had to complete for our home study.

FBI fingerprinting/full criminal background check

Full disclosure of finacial history and present assets

Entire driving record

Full Physical

vist by health and human svs to your home

inspection by fire department of your home

3 visits with social worker

interview of 4 close acquaintences, non family

1 face to face interview with acquaintence, non  family

written autobiography of you and your partner/spouse

attend mandatory meetings (adoption agency requirements)

and the list goes on

It took us approximately 3 months to complete the process, including responses from the agencies to our adoption agency, then we began the real "wait" for our placement. That is the most difficult part, being a waiting parent, giving up control, trying to remain patient, and trusting in process. Good luck to you.

Answer 3

"There is no greater gift to give yourself and a child if you're not able to give birth to a child than adoption."

There is a quote an AP right above me just made. There is a couple things about that remark which are rather offensive. The first is the idea that children are gifts to oneself. It is a selfish premise to expect a child to brighten life of an adult. Second, he rather blatantly admits adoption is a second choice. While I appreciate the honesty that usually it is a second choice to adopt - why is it that so often adoptees get berated for wanting to know about his/her origins. It is natural for us to long for our families of origin, yet that is oftentimes discouraged.

Didn't mean to pick on you Countryboy, but my point to making an example of your words is this. I implore you to educate yourself about all perspectives of adoption. Learn what it's like from the adoptee and first parent perspective. Adoption is about building a family on a foundation of loss and grief. The better you understand those issues the better adoptive parenting you'll be able to do.

Answer 4

I don't know anything about the process honestly, I just want to commend you for adopting within you're own country, and not going outside. It's nice to know that you recognize that kids at home need parents and a good home as well. I don't think you're being racist, I just think you are being practical.

Hope it all works out!

Answer 5

the only thing I know about the adoption process is that it requires lots and lots of patience

Answer 6

Every country, and region within a country, is different, so my experience may have been very different than what you will experience.

In the USA, you have to go through a "Home Study", basically a process of determining if you are likely to make good adoptive parents.  This usually involves interviews about your past and your family, medical history, finances, and anything else that might be a factor.  This is usually pretty invasive, with some of the questions getting very personal, but necessary.

There is a lot of paperwork and 'jumping through hoops'.  With us, we have several different agencies involved with the case, and each one has a case worker.  We constantly were getting requests for information in the months leading up to the adoption.  We constant 'visits' from case workers "just to meet the kids and touch base".  

You will need a lawyer.  If they are any good, they will make the process very smooth.

Also, in most areas of the USA, it is possible to "Foster to adopt", meaning that you are willing to take in foster children while waiting for an adoptive placement.  The big advantage of this is that if a child is placed with you for foster is later placed for adoption, the foster parents is usually given the option to adopt before any other potential adoptive parents.  By opting for "foster to adopt" it usually takes less time and expidites the process.  However, I know of some cases where people fostered several kids before they were able to adopt, and had a very difficult time first bonding with those children, only to have to give them up.

Answer 7

In any home-study there is a ton of paperwork you have to fill out, and questionnaires which do have questions that you think are odd things to ask.  One of the questions on ours had to do with our s*x life.  Once all that is done they come into your home a check it out.  Don't let this make you feel like your house must be spotless.  It just needs to be clean and neat, they also check for parks and schools nearby. Make sure your smoke alarms are in proper working order and having one of those small fire extinguishers is a plus.  If you have pets just make sure you have them updated with vet care and that they look and smell clean.  Congrats on choosing adoption and I hope the best for you and I agree that there are More than enough children at home to adopt without having to go overseas.   Hope this helps you.