Step parent adoption.....Florida?

Question

I have been fighting with my ex-husband for 8 years now. Our child is 8. I have been remarried for 6 years and my husband wants to adopt my child. My child has been the only daddy that he has since he was 2. My ex only see's this child once a year as he is passing through the state, never calls and only pays child support because he is court ordered.

My Ex will not sign oer his rights "because I want him to" (his words. And his new wife wont allow him to. How old do you have to be in Florida in order to go to a judge and have this childs wants matter? My child really wants to be adopted by my husband. Please help.

Answer 1

I am involved in a similiar situation and I reside in Pa... however... I was allowed to have my son~at the time age 8 and now 9 sign a notirized statement in front of 2 witnesses stating his desires and his understanding of the topic AT  hand.... Many blessings to you with this...

Sperm donors are something else aren't they?

Answer 2

You can ask for a guardian Ad Litum to be appointed to be a sounding board for your child. Most courts will hear the child at age 12.

You can also petition the court to terminate the fathers rights. If he doesn't bother to show up for the proceeding the judge will order you to try to make contact and if he fails to show again the judge will find for the petitioner usually.

There is a great self help site set up by the Florida courts. They have all the forms that you need to have filled out to start the proceedings. It gives you a great deal of help and ideas that may apply to  your situation.

Another thing that you can do is hit him for more support every year go to court and ask for an increase. Let him know that you have the forms made out and ready and waiting for him to sign. In fact you might just fill them out and mail them to him with instructions on how and where to sign them (in the presence of 2 witness and a notary public). Mail them every week with a thank you note for the support payments. The new wife may decide to get her nose out of it to increase her household income.

You don't need a lawyer to take him to court for more support. Just follow the directions in the self help section on support.

http://www.flcourts.org/gen_public/famil...

Answer 3

I was adopted my by stepfather in Florida at the age of 13, and my father was a deadbeat who ran off without paying child support.  He was afraid of going to jail, but still wanted to be a part of my life.  Since he was technically "address unknown" we had to run a legal notice in the newspaper for a week stating the intent of my stepfather to adopt me and that if the biological father did not respond, the adoption would be legal.  I believe they even sent a notice to the last known address (which his mother lived in) but he was too afraid to come forward.  I just remember being in this small room in a county building and the judge just asked me what I called this man (my stepfather) and I said "Daddy".  He asked me a few simple questions and that was it.  The adoption was granted.  I don't believe you can just be at an age to decide this, there are certains steps that have to be taken.  Since the real father is still in the picture, it gets kind of messy.  My husband was actually in a similar situation to mine except his mom was the one who left his life, and he never got adopted and it wasn't a problem.  Could you maybe get the dad to agree to changing your child's last name?  Good luck, and just remember that you don't want to have this all come back on you.  Your child is still very young and very well may want to have both dads.

Answer 4

Sorry -- what you are thinking of when a child's opinion is taken into consideration for which custodial parent (with shared custody) he wants to live with.  This is NOT the case here.

What you are wanting is for your child to be able to decide if he wants his father's rights terminated, and that is just NOT going to happen!  It is not up to the child, or you for that matter.

It is up to the judge to support the father's rights.  And the only way you can possibly force the issue, is if the bio father is way behind in child support, which he is not.  The other possibility is to hire an attorney, then have him served with termination papers.  He will then have the choice to sign a voluntary Relinquishment giving up his parental rights, or fight it.  If he ignores being served, his rights can be terminated --  if the judge determines that it was a good serve (went to the right person, etc.), and other details regarding the father's rights were not overlooked.  

But, is that what you really want to do? Set up permanent anomosity between you and your son's father?  If he does not want to voluntarily give up his rights, and is not abusing your child in any serious or documentable way, the BEST thing you can do for your son -- is be neutral about his father!  That means no arguements, no ridicule, no put downs, no bad talk, no name calling!  If a parent really wants what is best for their child, they will NEVER put down the other parent -- because that ohter parent you "hate" is half of who your child is!  So to put the father down, you are putting your child down!  And it doesn't take long at all for a child to figure that one out!  And then the damage starts setting in.

Good luck!

Answer 5

Your child is 8.  You shouldn't put something like this on his shoulders.  Your husband is his father whether he is a step parent or not because he has custodial custody via you.  Why does it matter that it be "legal"?  I wouldn't be putting this on your child.  Because your ex continues to pay child support and visits once year, you will be unable to prove abandonment.

Answer 6

You want your child to be adopted by your husband... your child will love him regardless with or without adoption papers. Don't spend most of your life in and out of court about this you only have ten more legal years with your child enjoy it. It is a blessing that your husband wants to adopt your son but don't stress over this what will be will be.