Sticky situation need some opinions........?

Question

Ok, so I'm 35 weeks pregnant. The bio-dad and I were together until 3 months ago. I left because he beat me, numerous times and he would not stop looking at child p**n. He wants to see me and the baby now, when he is born. He wants to see me before the baby is born, but I am against seeing him now. I told him I can do just fine on my own that I will not go after him for CHILD SUPPORT, so if he wants the whole paternity test he has to come after me, if he wants his rights. He has a CDV-1 charge, for beating me up. And because of that and child p**n I want any and all visitation supervised. He just wants to walk into the baby's life scott-free no legal bindings, and I have told him that he needs to talk to his lawyer. So that he can find out what he needs to do, to get things started if he so chooses. If he dosen't want parental rights, I would like him to sign them away, so in the future, if I marry and my husband wants to adopt him, there will be no problem. Thanks for your help.

Answer 1

DO NOT ALLOW THAT PILE OF **** NEAR YOUR CHILD!!  

why would you date someone who is into child p**n?

may i suggest giving the child up for adoption so it can have a 2 parent family?

Answer 2

I don't think you actually asked a question there. however that sick a*****e needs a beating or two. child p**n and you're still talking to him at all? I'd get a restraining order and move towns if I were you

Answer 3

Sounds like you know what you want.  What's the question?

Answer 4

As 1990's as it sounds, YOU GO GIRL!

Despite being the biological father, he has absolutely no right to see the kid after he beat you (and while you're pregnant, risking damage to his unborn child -- which leaves little to wonder of what he'll do to your son once he's born). That added with evidence of the pedophile behavior makes him completely and totally unfit to see your child. It is guaranteed that, unsupervised, he will abuse the child -- both physically and sexually.

This man is mentally ill. I don't mean it in a mean way -- I mean, in the clinical sense, he has psychological problems. It sounds like he has schizophrenia and/or bipolar disorder, and probably a history of being abused (physically, verbally, and sexually) as a child himself. However, his behavior toward you and his attitude toward parenthood inspires no pity in anyone -- abused, psychologically unfit, or not, he did NOT seek out professional help as he should have the moment he started having violent thoughts.

I'm sorry for you and your son, but both of you will definitely benefit from not having that man in your life in any way whatsoever. I would not trust even a supervised visit with someone like him. You are not obligated to list him as the biological father on the birth certificate or acknowledge him as the father. He has exactly 30-days after the birth to register for paternal rights, and 30 days after that to petition for custody of your son. In almost every (if not all) cases like this, the mother will win full custody -- at which point he will have no visitation rights unless you are willing, and you have the option of those visits being supervised or not.

Partial custody means the father gets visitation rights regardless of whether or not you want him to see the child.

I've gone through something very similar to this. I now have massive trust issues with anyone and everyone getting anywhere near me or my baby, including my own immediate family. I am in no contact with the biological father or his family. He is not listed as the birth father on the birth certificate. Since it has been more than 30 days since I gave birth, he no longer has any right to petition for paternal rights or custody of my daughter. I've done thorough research through my state legislature to make sure of it, but I suggest you do the research yourself just so you may sleep better at night instead of taking a stranger's word for it.

Good luck! Congratulations on your baby! Please, take care.

Answer 5

HMM AND LIKE THEY SAY ANYONE  CAN BE A DAD BUT A MAN IS A FATHER. IM ADVICE IS STAY AWAY FROM HIM.SOUNDS LIKE HE IS AN ABUSER AND YOU DONT NEED THAT IN YOUR LIFE OR YOUR CHILDS LIFE. THATS JUST MY OPINION. NOW... ON THE FLIP SIDE OF THINGS HE IS THE BABY'S FATHER AND YOU CAN DO ALL THAT LAW STUFF IF U FEEL UNCOMFORTABLE WITH THE MAN BEING ALONE WITH YOUR CHILD... SOO ITS REALLY UP TO YOU AND IN UR HEART OF WHAT YOU DECIDE TO DO.. EITHER WAY GOOD LUCK!

Answer 6

Well its a good thing he was charged he should also be arrested.

As for the child-p**n, that can definitely be used against him for any form of custody battle.  He has so many strikes against him.  Child pornography is sick and illegal if you have it on your computer.  Talk to your lawyer and get this guy away from you, possibly even a restraining order.

I don't know what you are asking though.

Answer 7

You need to contact your own attorney for your own advise,don't leave it up to just him.

Make sure to look out for yourself girl!

Answer 8

Wow...well, I wouldn't feel comfortable having him around me or my child, due to the fact he has caused me physical harm and who's to say he won't do that to the child.  Child p**n?  He need s to be in jail and u can't trust that type of person with unsupervised visitation...you are on the right track.  I agree with making sure u talk to a lawyer about your rights also.  But...keep him away...far away!

Answer 9

Please PLEASE stay away from that boy-as real men do NOT hit women. Do not go anywhere near him due to the fact that he hit you so many times and now that your pregnant, he may or may not intentionally hit you to hurt the baby but it may happen. You as an individual, have the right to protect yourself, and you as a MOTHER has the right to protect your child anyway YOU see fit, and that includes protecting him/her from pedaphiles like him! If i could suggest anything, I would not have him around my child supervised or NOT, he doesnt deserve it and it is possible that the courts wont even allow it due to his child pornography history. Also, i personally think that you SHOULD get child support for him. I understand you want to cut all ties, but money is money and that is what u will need to give your child the best life possible. MAKE him pay that child support, he did father the child..with offspring that is! Hope I helped!