Student hates her new school, how can I help?

Question

I'm hosting an exchange student this year. She was a very happy an upbeat girl until class actually started. She is upset that none of the kids are nice to her, and the class work is too hard (it is difficult, I helped for 6 hrs. last night!). Also the size of the school with 2500 students intimidates her. She has only one friend that was arranged through guidance to help her out.

I feel really bad and would like to know some suggestions to help cheer her up and make her understand that this will take some time for the adjustment.

I don't have kids, so I'm a newbie at this.

Thanks for any advice.

Answer 1

its normal for kids not to like new schools to begin with its even harder when your in a new country....all i can say is that when she gets friends it will get better....and just to make your home warm and happy and somewhere she likes to be at...if shes stressed at school she doesnt need to be stressed at home either

Answer 2

there's not much you can do if the kids at that school are closed minded pr*cks.

Answer 3

how old is she?

if she's finding the class work too hard, you should talk to her teachers about it.  they should be able to balance the workload so that she doesn't get too much to do all at once, and may be able to give her extensions on projects or items of classwork so that she can concentrate on them over the weekend - that way she isn't sitting up late to do the work, and then going into school tired.

talk to her a little more about why she feels the other kids aren't nice to her.  you may find out that actually nothing has been said or done against her, but that she's feeling very shy and is interpreting lack of interest as actual dislike.  if this is the case, encourage her to start up conversations with the other kids and perhaps to join in with some extracurricular groups.

if there's an actual bullying problem, based on her clothes/looks/accent/whatever, you should again speak to the school and ask them what their policy is on this sort of thing and how they advise you to handle it.  you could also try and suggest to her teachers that they set joint homework assignments or something which should be completed by working in pairs, to get the other kids interacting with her a bit more.

otherwise, just try and make sure that she has an active social life (homework permitting, of course!) outside of school, so that school doesn't become too large a part of her life, and so that she has something to talk about when she goes into school.  take her to activities or sports classes where there will be other people her own age to socialise with - if they're in the local area, she may well find that she makes friends that way with people who attend her school and would be happy to befriend her during the day.

it can be a huge shock starting a new school, and the insecurities of otherwise confident-seeming people can be brought to the fore at this time.  be patient with her if she takes her stresses out on you a bit (but don't take too much bad behaviour - after all, it's not your doing that she's struggling a bit!), and she should find herself more settled and with more people to talk to within a couple of weeks.

Answer 4

when you want to make new friends at school, it will take a while for her to be able to make new friends and also if classwork is too difficult for her then she should ask for help from the teachers and they will be able to help her, i'm the teachers are nice to her. thats what i did when i first time went to school and then i got bullyed and after that i found new friends, sometimes classwork can be hard for me so i would ask for help if i was her.

Answer 5

There must be someone else in the school that feels the same as her no friends lonly and people arn't nice to them. Get her together with one of these people or make her go to a club or something. It will take time though for her to get a friend and people to get used to her. Most new people have to go through the same thing. Tell her she has to cooperate as well though and be warm friendly and smily. Mabey she should also be put in lower sets. Nothing much can be done for having a big school!!

Answer 6

To make friends she should join sports or clubs so she can be around the same kids for a significant amount of time.  If you are spending that much time on homework you should contact her teachers.  If they don't help then talk to the principal.  Students should not have to do that much school work (in my opinion)!!  Tell her that she should not feel like an outcast but that she should open up and be herself and eventually kids will start talking to her.

Answer 7

tell her to grow a back bone. I went to 3 different elementary schools and moved 4 times and am now attending my senior year in high school. She get used to the change and make friends.

Answer 8

...lol

Answer 9

Talk to the school to see what they can do about it. Education is very important and being upset over finding the work difficult isn't going to help.

Answer 10

Well simply be her friend.

Answer 11

She sounds like a loser

Answer 12

well try get her to join a home work club so that she will make friends and get the help she needs to complet the work.

find out if theres someone in the school who is from her country or speaks her language and then get them to take her under there wing.

xoxo

good luck

Answer 13

just tell her it'll get better ... make her feel at home.  

Answer 14

I would go right back to Guidance and discuss this with someone at the school.  Her homework should not be taking 6 hours.  Perhaps she is not a grade level compared to her country.  You need to talk to someone at the school.