Sweet 16...not really! pleaseee helpp

Question

ok so august 4th is my 16th birthday. we celebrated on august 1st. well on the 1st my mom and i got in a fight and i called her annoying, then later we eventually went out to dinner and my whole family except my grandparents ignored me...even the waiter forgot to sing happy bday. then we came home and everyone sang to me and then everyone ignored me again so i went to watch tv. then on august 2nd i asked if since we aren't doing anything for my birthday could i just have a couple of friends over...we got in a huge fight again about how ungrateful i am cuz we went out with my family already and blah blah...idk the fight kept getting worst. then i got upset because no one cared about my birthday...now long story short we got into a fight my tv, phone and computer are taken away...I'm grounded for 2 weeks...no birthday celebration....no gifts...and my parents told me they are getting separated because i ruined their relationship...is it me that's wrong? did i really do anything that bad? what should i do to fix it?

PS telling the version that makes them look better...

please answer I'm really upset my whole bday is ruined...

Answer 1

First of all you are 16 and if a fight because you wanted attention caused your parents to break up then your parents' relationship was already rocky.  You need to calmly go to your parents and ask them if you all can talk.  I am sure they didn't mean it when they said it was your fault.  You need to ask them if everything is ok with them.  They might have money problems going on or something else that they didn't want to tell you about.  In anger people say alot of things they don't mean.  And I was 16 not too long ago and believe me I know how you feel, my parents would fight because of me and it hurts.  You should apoligize, because parents do alot for their children, it isn't cheap, I have a daughter of my own (5 months old).  The biggest problem that all teenagers have with their parents is that they are selfish....NOW DON'T TAKE THIS THE WRONG WAY PLEASE...as a minor you don't have to worry about bills and mortgage payments and car and all that fun stuff.  It gets very stressful, tell them you are sorry you acted badly and you want to know if there is anything you can do to help them.  Help out with things around the house, show them that you do appreciate them, believe me they will notice and things can change.  good luck

Answer 2

there's really nothing you can do, maybe confront your parents and ask them what you did wrong? i'm sorry your birthday sucked :(

Answer 3

That actually happened to me on my 14th b-day. I've heard from alot of people that it wasn't actually my fault.

My parents ended up working it out. There still together. maybe that will happen to you too. =[

Answer 4

If your parents really do break up its not your fault at all. On top of it, it has nothing to do with you. Which ever parent to you that is being selfish, and unwilling too see that their own short comings are what caused the split not you. I am sorry that your birthday had to be messed up because of it, but I guess you coudl look at it as a leason to respect how your parents feel even if you don't like it. As long as you live under someone else roof you have to abide by there rules even as an adult

Answer 5

Well, I think its pretty cruel of your parents to say that you are the reason they are breaking up. That's not true. Your parents need to grow up. I'm sorry you didn't have a nice birthday. You probably will hate me for saying this but...you are getting older and you will have to start to deal with things like an adult woman, not a child. For whatever reasons, we may not get the birthday we want. You will have to grin and bear it. I'm 36 and I never had a Sweet anything. My Mother stopped giving me birthday parties around 9. I never had one as a teenager. Your parents may feel as if they cannot afford to do more than they already did. See, when parents are under financial strain, they get angry; and they feel pushed when you keep asking for things.

Have you ever thought that maybe they just can't afford to feed your friends right now or have them over. Little get-togethers still cost money. So don't push it. Leave it alone. Your parents sound like they have a lot of grown-up problems of their own and their divorce isn't helping. I'm sorry you are getting the brunt of this anger. It's not your fault. Just tuck your head down and do what you are told. When you turn 18, get out and go to college! We've all grown up in households that were not the best. Now at 36, I always plan my own birthday; and I make sure it's good. Two years I sent myself to Las Vegas! First class!  I don't rely on anyone else to value my birthday. I love my birthday, but it means very little to my parents. They haven't given me a gift since maybe I was 20. I give them a gift each year. Se la vie! We have to suck it up and deal with it. I'm my own person. I know they love me, but its not what they value.

The best revenge you can have on your parents and anyone else is to be happy without them. GO TO COLLEGE, get a get job, makes lots of $$ and have yourself the nicest birthdays money can buy! Invite them and show them how you roll! Right now, you are child and you have to live by their rules. It hurts like h**l, but this is life and you are getting a taste of the real world. I know you wanted a 'bigger production'. I did too. I didn't get it either. I got a gift and that was it. I didn't even get dinner out. Also, you have to realize that everyone doesn't value birthdays or weddings, etc. Everyone has their own sense of what's important. My parents don't think weddings are important. They got married at the courthouse and said if it was good enough for them it was good enough for me. I disagreed and paid for my own! My husband I saved $10K, and my parents gave us $1k. We spent their entire $1k on liquor for the reception. So...this is life. Your parents may not agree with what you think is important, but who cares. You are only a child for a two more years! Then you are out!  

Answer 6

.........HAPPY B'DAY.........

look this is usually same in most of the house.. so u need not worry everything will go alright