TTC#1 for the past 6 months?

Question

Both my husband and I are 30 yrs old, we have been trying for 6 months and each month gets harder for me. He is the type that is very easy going and with him it is when it happens happens.

I do not know if it is me or not but there are so many pregnant woman

around me and I am getting very jealous (I am not that type of person so iI do not understand why)

also it is very difficult for me to have s*x when we have to plan it by calendar. it is just not working for me.

i do not know how to relax and not think of it

any thoughts?????

thank you

Answer 1

I know how you feel. We've been trying to conceive since December, almost eight months ago and still not luck. Their was a time when I was feeling just like you. I felt like everyone was getting pregnant both of my sister-in-law became pregnant just months after each other and seeing them both with their stomach popping out, I would think that was sapposed to be me. Even a few of our friends became pregnant. I would just hate hearing those words "I'm pregnant" or "Guess who's pregnant" I would just think in my mind "not me" I was happy for them but at the same time I was hurting inside. I would constantly be crying and making myself feel low. But I think it's just one of those stages every women that is trying to conceive goes through because eventually you get passed all that, in a way you don't think about it all that much, and most of the time you're just waiting for that time of the month when you ovulate and for that time to see if you start your period or not. But don't worry so much because I'm sure that eventualy you'll conceive and so will I. Goode Luck and Don't Give Up!

Answer 2

I'm sorry for you, and I know how hard the waiting is.  I don't know if this will help you or not, and I know my situation is not the same as yours but here goes.  My husband and I had been trying and trying to get pregnant and then we finally did and felt so blessed and on cloud nine, at 11 weeks we lost our baby and we were both devastated.  We were not intimate for almost 6 weeks because I think subconsciously we both were afraid of having the same situation happen again.  Well to get us through this hard time and to help us feel like we were taking a step in the right direction with starting our family we started looking into adoption.  All of a sudden the pressure is off us as individuals to make this baby thing happen, we can actually make it happen without the calendar and temperature taking.  Our love life has been reignited and we are much closer and happier.  I don't know if that will help you, but sometimes I know putting the pressure on yourself and your own body to make this baby takes all the spark and fun out of your relationship; hang in there and stop trying so hard, it will happen for you just like it will for me, one way or another.  Good luck and God bless.

Answer 3

I know exactly how you feel girl. My 2 closest friends are pregnant and I want to be so badly too. So I see their cute little pregnant belly all the time. We have been trying for a year and a half. I just have given it to the Lord and I know that it's his timing and not mine. My husband and I don't have a schedule caz that really does make it stressful and less enjoyable especially when your not in the mood.

It will happen and if not God will give something just as great if not better.

Good Luck :-)

Answer 4

I feel for you and i'm sorry you are feeling down.

My first four i had on the first try and now 5 years later i've been TTC for 8 months. Crossing my fingers again for this month to be the one. My sisternlaw and I decided to get preggo at the same time and she is now due in a couple weeks and i'm sitting in her back-light. Buying clothes wishing it was for our baby. Would of been nice to be pregnant together. Keep your head up and God will bless you with a baby when the time is right for the both of you. That's what I keep thinking for myself. And the problems with planned s*x...plan a special night, lingerie, or a seductive dance...something to make it fun.

Good luck to you...

Answer 5

Just set a schedule.  Have s*x every other day no matter what time of the month it is.  Then it won't seem like your trying but rather having fun.

My wife and I tried for 12 months then went to a specialist.  4 months later pregnant.  Sometimes it happens without help and other times its aided.

Try and have fun with it because making it like work makes it not enjoyable.

Answer 6

It's been 10 months for us and it's really getting to me now. To make matters worse, my SIL announced last month right after my AF arrived that she was pregnant with their second child. We still have no children.

People will tell you to relax and you will fall pregnant. They are right and they wrong. High levels of stress can cause menstruation and ovulation to happen late or not at all. But at the same time, relaxing will do nothing if there is an underlying condition.

Are you charting? You should go to a website like www.fertilityfriend.com or www.mymonthlycycle.com   Maybe being in control of the situation will help you feel better and more relaxed. Start charting your bbt (basal body temperature) and consider buying a ovulation predictor kit to help you find out when and if you ovulate.

Remind yourself that 6 months is not a long time even though it feels like an eternity. Normal healthy couples can take up to a year to get pregnant and you're only halfway through that year. There are women on here who have been tested and supposedly have no problems yet they have been ttc for YEARS.

Keep in mind that all the pregnant women you see may have actually had a difficult time getting pregnant but chose not to share that information with others. I have told no one that we are ttc because I don't want others to always ask, "are you pregnant? Are you pregnant?"  So when I do get pregnant everyone will probably think it happened smoothly or was an accident.

If you're religious.... pray. Praying will help you feel better. Join a ttc group, it will help you. There are a lot of online groups. It will make you feel better to see all the other women in the same boat as you.  

Answer 7

Try stopping with the calender thing for a while and just do it when you want to.

This way it is not so planned and clinical.

Being stressed about it will only make matters worse for you I'm afraid, so try to do things you enjoy together and have a laugh.

Give yourselves at least a year to fall pregnant, as this is the norm.