Teachers, i have something that's been bothering me?

Question

Ok, i'm 13. I've got an aunt that i've been close to all my life. She's got a 5 yr. old daughter that i babysit, her daughter is a little smaller than normal. Instead of sending her to kindergarten this year, she's going to send her when she's 6 (so she's the same size as other kids). I'm really close to this little girl & i care about her as if she were my own kid. So teachers i have 2 questions 4 u:

1. Is this a smart thing 4 my aunt 2 do?

2. What, if any, challenges will my cousin face because she started school late?

Answer 1

Well, I'm not a teacher, but I believe that it could cause her some mental trauma, especially depending on whether she gets teased by other kids.

Answer 2

I think she should go now, not later. You can't keep someone out of school because of their size.  How can she neglect her child's education because of her small size??

It may be that she just doesn't want to let the child go so soon.  It's probably psychological.

Answer 3

She should be in school.  Just because shes a smaller size now means nothing(she will catch up to the children, all children grow at different rates contrary to what people selling books want to say).  She is developmentally ready to take on that challange and actually needs it in order to strive.

Her mother might be using that as an excuse.  I know alot of parents who decide to keep their children home longer but they are for selfish reasons.  She might say it's because she's small, but that might lean towards her still seeing her as her baby and not wanting to give up that feeling

Answer 4

Well, I'm no teacher, but I started Kingdergarden late. I went when I was 6 and I was fine. I was a little taller than most of the other kids. It's not that much of a big deal. You still learn the same way. The only thing that matters is that by middle school, your cousin MAY be a little more mature than the other kids. So, I say, send her a little later. I wouldn't do it based on her size, I'd do it based on what you think is best. My parents sent me later because they were the youngest in their class, so they hated it.

1. Yes, it probably is.

2. The only thing is that your cousin will be more mature once they reach "that age".

Answer 5

Research shows that children who start school later do better, even later in life. I would encourage your Aunt to base her decision on her maturity level, not size. Being small in school won't harm her. If she is mature and independent she needs to go now because she is likely to become a child with behavior problems if she waits. If she is immature and still wants everything done for her another year will probably benefit her.

Answer 6

My sister is shorter then the rest of her class, one of the youngest too. She keeps up fine. I'm sure the kid will do fine, especially if she stays in the same school with the same kids, they'll all know she never failed so they won't make fun of her. *Shrugs* I'm sure it's not bad for the child. She may be better off for it - she'll be capable of understanding things better than her class.

Answer 7

personally-If it were me-I would send her now instead of waiting. She may catch up or she may be the smallest. No big deal, especially for girls.

BUT.... I really don't think it's really going to make a huge difference either way. She will be just fine. Kids may sometimes ask why she is older and she will just say my mom started me a year late. no big deal.

Answer 8

this is a kinda good idea because she cares about if kids will make fun of her or not and she will always be older and smarter than other kids.

Answer 9

I think the real heart of your question is "What can I do about this?"

In reality, not a lot.  This is the parent's decision and you'll run into a lot of times that you don't agree with certain things parents do when they raise their children.  But you still sit back and respect that fact that they are the parents and it's their choice in a lot of decisions they make.

I don't believe spanking kids is right.  But I can't tell parents to not spank their children.  That's not my place nor is it my responsibility.

What you CAN do is try to show the benefits of sending her to school to your aunt.  Don't do it while your cousin is around because then you'll be throwing her into the discussion, which you don't want to do.  

"I know it's your decision whether she goes to school or not.  But my opinion is that she seems really ready and seems excited about the idea of school.  Too often, children are not excited about school and we miss that opportunity to get them to see how much fun learning can be.  I just would hate to see her miss out on that opportunity while we have the chance and personally think she should start school while that opportunity is there."

If the dialog is cut off from that opening, then it's obvious she's frustrated with the idea and doesn't want to talk about it.  Just thank her for letting you express your idea and let the conversation turn to something else.  If she's interested in talking about it, feel free to give your point of view.  But always remember that it's not your decision and you should respect her decision.

Matt

Answer 10

It may or may not be a smart thing...

If she is already developmentally ahead of children her age, she may be very bored in school, especially being a year older. If she is developmentally at or below her age group, she most likely will do fine. You also need to take into account her social/emotional development...If she is socially at where her peers are, she will be able to relate to them, however if she is socially beyond he age group she may have a lot of trouble making friends and relating to the kids in her class.

So it all depends on where she is developmentally, socially and emotionally.  If your aunt is not taking into account any of this and just basing her decision on the child's size, that may not be the right thing to do. The unfortunate part is that she is the parent and will make her decision based on what she feels is right regardless of what your concerns are.