Teen mothers.......?

Question

Girls at the age of 14 through 17 having kids? It's just ridiculous! They're still kids themselves. There's no way they can raise a child at that age. The bills and costs alone would be too much for a teenager's part time job. McDonalds doesn't pay that much people! But the maturity and responsibilty needed to have kids is much greater than that of a fifteen year old. They are too young for s*x in the first place, but I won't go into that. I believe that teens should give their kids up for adoption. There are plenty of loving couples that can't have kids who would adore a baby. They'd be prepared for one too. I know people are going to have issues with my opinion - but don't you agree that the baby would be best off with an adoptive family than a 14 year old biological mum?

Don't report this, it's just a question. I want to understand why people think teenagers can be parents.

Answer 1

i dont agree with you what so ever. i was 15 got pregnant the first time had him at 16 and 17 pregnant had her at 18 i got married to the dad just days after i found out i was pregnant the first time. i homeschooled myself and got a highschool diploma and worked as he id also we were on medicaid but paid for our rent and food our self. now i am 22 with a 4 and 5 year old and pay my health insurance , rent , bills, food everything all my own with my husband . i was responsible teen and cant stand when people judge teens saying that all teens are dead beat parents. yes i may have had to use medicaid for a little while but now i am paying lots of taxes that are used to pay for others to be on medicaid and i pay my own insurance on top of that. i am a great parent and my kids could not be happier to have me at their mother and i could not emagine not having my kids in my life. my kids are very beautiful smart kids an have been taught well. they have clothes, food , health insurance, toys, and a loving family and no i did not ahve my parents rais my kids they are raised by their parents, i never partied drank and was a bad teen i just made the bad choice to ahve s*x earlier than i should have but i would never say i regret my kids. they are the reason i actually went to school and am now a hairstylist. everything i do is for those two beautiful kids.  

Answer 2

It all just depends on whether or not the teen steps up to the plate to take responsibility.  

My sister was pregnant at 15.  We were angry at first, but she completely  changed for the better.  She graduated high school and has worked since she was 16 and is still with the father.  The baby is now almost 4 and the sweetest thing in the world.

On the opposite end, my boyfriend's cousin is 18 with two children with major health problems and another on the way because she did drugs and drank while pregnant.   All the children have different deadbeat fathers and she never completed her freshman year and she is an absolute burden on the family.

So... IT DEPENDS ON THE TEEN... similar to any person who is pregnant.  A 35 year old mother could be worse than a 14 year old depending on maturity and responsibility.  Teenagers can be parents... some can't.  Adults can be parents.. some can't.

Answer 3

my cousin is having a baby in 2months

shes getting married & will be happy :)

[shes 15 or 16]

not all teens are bad parents.

& still

theyre parents would help out i mean, their family.

theyre suppose to be there for you.

& they have a head start.

~kitty  

Answer 4

i agree with you , but i don't think they should give up here child. as a young mother i would never give up my first child at all. i had him inside me growing up feeling all his movement. i was pregnant when i was 18 and i had him when i turn 19. my husband is working 2 jobs and going to school. we now that we are making the best for are child.  

Answer 5

It's not an ideal situation and no, teens should not be having s*x.  No, they aren't mature adults and they aren't ready for parenting.  But what about the trauma of giving up their offspring?  What about family support?  I know that if my teen showed up preggo, i would fight pretty hard to help her out and teach how to raise her child right.

Answer 6

You are right about not being ready at such a young age, not sure about the whole adoption thing though.  I think an open adoption is a much better choice for a teenager, because they can still see their child and know they are being taken care of, and get to see them grow up.  BUt they also still get to be a teen and grow up themselves while giving someone the gift of parenthood who might not of otherwise gotten the chance to have children.  I was adopted, and let me tell you, it was not a good adoption, I no longer talk to either of my adopted parents or my birth parents, I was sexually and mentally abused most of my life and feel great resentment because of that.  IF it would have been an open adoption, maybe someone would have seen the signs ans helped me.  I don't know if I am making complete sense, but these are just my thoughts on the matter.

Answer 7

I myself fell pregnant when i was just 15 years old.  I was half way through studying  year 12.  Yes it was a mistake, i was not ready to be a mother nor was my partner ready to be a father.  We had only been dating for about 6 months but decided we could make it work.   I continued through school and graduated with good marks 6 months pregnant.  I did it all myself after my family practically disowned me.  It was hard but I kept going.  All my friends left me because I could no longer drink and party all night.  My baby was my main priority though.  I gave birth when I was 16 years old and my family finally started to come back into my life.  I still felt very alone though as my partner didn't cope to well with having a baby so he took up up a job 5 hours away from where i was living and only came home on weekends.  That was hard.  I had never felt to alone.  The day my baby was born i matured very fast.  I promised my baby I would do everything I could to give her the best in life.  Yes it is hard trying to pay bills when you dont have a good job but it's not only the young girls that fall pregangt when they dont have money to support them.  How many women are there over the age of 18 that are at home sitting on the doll having kids.  No one has the right to tell someone they should give up there kids.  My baby is now 5 years old she started prep this year and is the most beautiful child.  She is smart, funny, outgoing just a perfect child.  It's people like you that make it the hardest for young women having children.  I was constantly starred at, talked about, critised and for what.  I am doing just as good as any other mother who had her child when she over the age that says it's wrong.  You disgust me.  No child is better off without there biological mother.  And if they are it would want to be for a better reason then Money and Age.  I now have another daughter who is two.  I am now 22 years old and still suffer from the looks of disgust from people like you.  I love my children very much and so does there father who is now my husband.   We have everything we need and my children are happy.  That's alot more then some people have that have got all the experience and money they handle.  

Answer 8

Not all teen parents are the stereotype.  

Answer 9

In all honesty, You have no place to talk. You haven't been and your not going to be a teen parent, You don't know what it's like and you've never stepped in our shoes for a day. Yes we are young for having children but honestly, A 14 year old can be just as good as a mother as a 40 year old mother.

I have four children, I had my first at 13 and I'm not going to top it off with a piece of cherry because, yes it was very hard but I wouldn't change it for the world. All my children have the same father and we are married, He's off in Iraq while I stay at home with my children. A parent should NOT be judged by the age. We do what we can and we know what's best for our child rather then an adoptive family because it's our OWN flesh and blood.

You have your opinion. I have mine. We are all entitled to have our own opinions.

I can honestly say to myself at the end of everyday when my children are in bed. "Hey I'm not a bad parent as many people think, Just because I'm young. I've done a great job with my children" I have my grade 12 and plan on going back to college when the semester starts so I am trying to better my life to make it better for my children. I am proud of my children and wouldn't trade my "Mommy job" for anything in this world.

Oh and I must add that NO one puts food on MY table except myself and my husband.

Answer 10

Not all 14 year olds make terrible moms/dads so no adoption isn't always a necessary thing.  Even if the 14 year old isn't ready to be a mom/dad maybe their parents would like to still be a grandparent.  I know my sister was 15 when she got pregnant and I am glad I got to watch my nephew growup and my mom and dad are glad they got to watch their first grandchild growup.  Adoption would have just torn the family apart at that point in time.  My sister got married at 16 and raised her family.  

Answer 11

well excuse me if u dont want to b reported dont say stuff like that i had my baby at 16 and im 19 now me and my boyfriend have done an excellent job all our bills have been paid since day one we own our own home we have 2 cars both always worked passed my year 12 with flying colours i couldnt b happier n wouldnt change it we have done everything right so dont u dare sit there n say things like that mate i know 30 year old that have there kids taken off them and there unfit i know i do alot better then heaps of other older women. and u know wat my heart goes out to all the women and men that cant concive,  i had my baby i dont believe in abortion so dnt be critisising  we were more then ready to have a baby.

i understand how people may feel about young parents but DONT JUDGE !!! this is the 21st centuary were alot mature now a days with other responsibilities so b4 u had wrote all that selfish stuff u should actually sit back n think it through properly  

Answer 12

Teenagers can be parents. Some do it very well and others do not. Same with adults. There are plenty of people out there that should not have children. Telling someone that they have to give their baby up because they are too young is just wrong. It is no one elses choice. Most teen parents live at home with their own parents and have help.  

Answer 13

Not all teenagers make bad parents.  It's hard, but not impossible.  People make mistakes, they don't usually get pregnant on purpose.  Someone as wise and mature as you should understand that.

Answer 14

I guess you never really understand unless you yourself have been in the situation. I think you are completely miss judging teen moms. I know many and they are all wonderful even though YES  times are tough. Having s*x at 14 is very ridiculous but guess what the age is just getting YOUNGER. I know 8 years olds who already kiss--french kiss. I know 11 and 12 year olds who fool around. Times are changing. Blame it on society. Everything on tv, computer, in school and at home. Kids are expected to be mature at younger and younger ages meaning they mentally develop faster.

No I dont agree that teen moms should give up their baby.  I think they have the right to make that decision. Would it be a smart idea? Of course but do you know what it would be like to give up your child after carrying it for 9 months and  giving birth to it? HARDER than struggling to provide.  

Don't judge young moms because they are young. Give them a chance to be everything they can be.

Answer 15

my mom had my sister at 16 and she got married and divorced and ended up with my dad, but erica(my sis) turned out just fine. so yeah maybe 14 is a lil crazzy but what u say is not a fact and its rude bc its usually a mistake ppl make ok so yeah stfu this Q is dumb as.

Answer 16

Not all teens are Horrible mothers. Yes there may be more that are not so great, but that doesnt apply to all. I had my daughter senior year of high school, i was working, i had my own vehicle, and my own apt at the time. Yes it was difficult but i think i did a great job raising my daughter. It just depends on the person, i was very mature for my age and stepped into motherhood like nothing. There are however some cases where yes adoption would be the best answer.

Answer 17

What these little girls don't understand is this:  teens shouldn't be having s*x.  Period.  Teen moms have so many excuses for their behavior and why the bc failed, etc.  It's pretty simple.....keep your legs crossed until you are an adult.  It's actually a very healthy thing to do.  

When it comes right down to it, the answer is simple.  Abstinence.