Teenage pregnancies...?

Question

is it bad that i see know problem with teenage pregnancies...?

i see a BIG problem if the mother and father will not love the child and treat the child well!

But if the mother and/or father of that baby love that baby unconditionally and are willing to pay any price to see that child happy and well... aren't they better parents than alot of adults?... i think teenage parents should be given a break - its only a small fraction of them that give the rest a bad name.

what do you think of my view?

and please share your own...

(my sister is 21 with 2 children and she is a great mother!, with a job and just moved into a house - those kids go everywhere with her and she loves them more than life itself!)

Answer 1

I'd have to say that you are right and wrong. Parenting has nothing to do with age. I know people who waited until they were in their thirties to have kids and are still crappy parents and I know teens who are too. It's all about how you choose to treat you kids and you're values. I had my first at twenty and I can't say that I am the best parent but I try hard and love my kids to death, they are my life and I would do anything for them. I have single friends now in our mid and late twenties that I hope never have kids.

Answer 2

you are rite, so long as the parents will care for the child and take full responsibility, they should actually be respected, however i do disapprove of s*x before marriage, however, we have to hand it to those teens who will take the role of parenthood

Answer 3

What teenager earns enough to look after a baby and pay all expenses for the baby and their own keep. I am sick fed up paying for all those kid who breed and let the state pay and supply them with a house.

Answer 4

as long as the child is loved and cared for properly then no thats not a problem, but i do think its better to wait to have kids, coz when ur an adult ur more stable, u understand more about life, and ur in a stable relationship with enough money, whereas if ur a teenager its impossible for either parents to go out to work coz ur underage, you will have to rely on ur parents help bring up ur kids.

im 23 with a beautiful 9 month old baby boy, i love him to bits, hes my life, however i think that if i had him in my early teens then i wouldnt be able to cope as a mother, so im glad i waited, otherwise i would have missed out on my own childhood, todays teenagers are growing up too fast , i think they should slow down and stop rushing into adulthood, they've got the rest of their lives to do that, enjoy the freedom while it lasts.

Answer 5

I completely agree with you .. It doesn't matter whether your 16, 17 or forty. Whether not you make a good parent I believe has nothing to do with your age. (I'm not naive being a teenage parent does make it harder to support your baby but not impossible.)  Whether or not you make a good parent is based on the fact that your willing to put your child's needs before your own and your willing to do what ever it takes to make sure you child has best that you can possibly give them. (and being willing to give up sleeping for the next 18 years Lol)  

Dedication and love make for a good parent not your age.

I was 17 when my son was born. I did  have help from my parents in the beginning( I paid them back and have never been on welfare in my life) but I have a stable job(s) now, I just moved into a new apartment and I graduated college with an honors degree in Chemistry.

I did that all while raising a child on my own. I have healthy two year old baby boy and I think I'm a d**n good parent.

It's really just about how much you love and care for your child and I don't think age should ever be factored into that equation.

Answer 6

I was a teenage mother(19) when I had my son. Although he has been loved and cherished, and has developed into a wonderful 20yr old, I do not recommend it. I do agree that you can be a good parent, as a teenager, but with hindsight I believe that I was too young, and that there are many more who are too young, too immature, too selfish, and have so little understanding of life and how to teach their kids correctly. Although I had seen things, been places, and done alot there was still so much I wanted to do, and see. I had my second child at 26, and felt that was a far better age to have a child, a girl,I felt more secure and grounded as a person, and I really don't want her to become a mother before she reaches her twenties. What I do believe in is, instead of condemning young mothers, we should find ways of supporting very young teenage mothers, e.g those between 13-17, maybe even 18, so that they can give their children the best start in life.

Answer 7

I agree for the most part.  Some teenagers make great parents, it's just the minority or council estate chavs that ruin it for the rest of us.

I'm 19 and I have an 8 weeks old baby.  I'm a stay at home mum but husband has a job and earns enough money to support our family (he is also 19).  We own a house and we are doing better than a lot of people I know that are much older.

It's not really a matter of age, some 16 years old parents are better than 40 year old parents and vice versa.

Answer 8

yes and no lol

no if the mother knows what she is doing and will create a stable enviroment for the baby

Yes as the type of job i do basically there are a lot of teenagers who have babys to get a house and live of benefits n thats it for the rest of theyre lives they rely on that to keep them

Answer 9

I come from a teenage parent, and I think my mother rocks.  It all depends on the parent.  I have seen a lot of teenagers that shouldn't have kids and I have seen a lot of teenagers who are great parents.  But the same goes for twenty and thirty year olds.

Answer 10

Unfortunatly many say they love the baby unconditionally but are not willing to prove it, they stuggle to keep on top of the baby and keep their social life.

Having a child is losing part of you it's dependent on how much your willing to give up for this baby.

I know many teens who don't try hard enough for their child and treat them very bad but in my opinion i find around the age of 25yrs to be worse.

Answer 11

I agree with the fact that we shouldn't judge them because they are teens, they can still be good moms but let's all be realistic. They're teenagers, they're just babies having babies. I'm a teen right now and I can't imagine how hard it would be for me, I can barely take care of myself, let alone another human being. If teenagers want to have s*x at leat use protection and birth control.

Answer 12

i STRONGLY agree with you!!

Answer 13

I think pregnancy outside marriage is wrong and is contributing serious damage to the moral order of society and it only takes a few irresponsible and impressionable teenagers to have s*x, get pregnant and then not have a clue how to raise their children and this leads to a vicious cycle of dysfunction inside that family for generations.

I think that some form of mandatory parenting education should form part of the education system as there are simply too many young people and many older people who do not have a clue about maintaining a family.

Answer 14

Children should not be having children... for a start, it's doubtful they can afford to provide for them.

I am not saying it's morally wrong, and accidents happen, but we all need to be responsible for our actions.

Answer 15

There are more bad teenage moms than good ones. Very few are good parents and don't rely on their own parents for help.

I don't think they should be getting pregnant in their teens at all no matter how much they think they can love their kid. It is not all about that...

I see a problem when the teenage girl and her baby is living at home with her parents and both are being taken care of by her mommy & daddy because she can't do it on her own.

Why should any grandparent have to raise their grandkid?? I would be so ashamed if i had to rely on my parents to take care of my own kid.

Why do teens want to give up their own lives so soon? Why can't they wait or are they doing it for attention or what -to hold onto a guy...That hardly ever works.

When you cannot even buy your own food, clothes, get from point A to point B do you honestly think a teenager should be having a kid?

No...There is no excuse for getting pregnant when there are so many birth control methods out there and you can get it free at the health department......

Answer 16

theres a big difference between a 21 year old with 2 kids and a 14 year old with 2 kids.

Answer 17

The majority of them are still developing themselves and should be doing other things.  Some may be reasonable parents but I see plenty who aren't.

Answer 18

i agree with the way you stated that! and what you said makes a lot of sense. but still not saying that the ones that do make a bad name for it shouldn't be delt with.

Answer 19

I agree. The fact is, unless they aren't taking care of their kids, or the kids is suffering, it isn't really anyone else's business.

My cousin is going to have a baby and she is 18 (she'll be 19 when the baby is born) and I know she's going to be a great mother.

Lately it's been especially irritating when people put down teen parents, but it has always bothered me, because they don't know the whole situation and they really have no right to judge.

Answer 20

My step-daughter is 15 and pregnant. And I TOTALLY agree with you. As long as they take responsiblity and are good parents then whats the problem. I support my step-daughter all the way and I am helping her through this bump in the road.

Answer 21

THANK YOU!

I'm a proud teenage mom. Me and his father take full responsibility for him, buy him everything he needs and more. He's reached all his milestones for his age and I can proudly say I'm a great mom. I communicate with him and teach him about the world surronding us. I let him explore things [safely] I encourage his curiousity and most of all I give him all the love possible.

Some responses say it's babies having babies. I don't encourage teenage pregnancies for everyone by any means, because I know my maturity level and most teens have not developed that. However, regaurding that statement age does not prepare you for birth or raising a child. At any age you are going to endure the samethings, the labor, the last nights, the collicy ones, the teething joys, and the tantrums. I don't think being any older could have prepared me. I'm glad I had my son at a young age so I can be involved in his life, and I actually think if I waited until I was older it would have been harder on my nerves and my risk of PPD would have increased. I'm a teen I'm use to going on 3hours of sleep, so that's nothing for me : ]

Answer 22

I completely agree! It is not ok if the parents treat them as an annoyance. But when they are loved like any other child and cherished so dearly by their parents, I see no problem expect how she got pregnant in the first place. lol

Answer 23

hi, i have no problem with teenage mums i was 15 when i had my first child i with the help of my family brought her and i continud with my schooling now i have a great job am married and have 4 children.

i think alot of people r vey sterotypical and just asume that teenage mums want 2 b drop outs and have every thing provided for them but thats definatly not the case.

im glad u have that view its time young mums were given the credit they were due

Answer 24

Well usually teens are not ready, and aware of what they're doing.

And also, they're throwing the rest of their life away, usually, they can't go to college because of too much responsibility. And wouldn't they just want to have a real life, before settling down??

Answer 25

I agree with about people giving teenagers a break although they are to young it is still not the way handle things like that..........I was 16 and my daughter's mom was 15 .........I am now about to be 20 and I am a single-parent but the point is I would do anything in the world for my daughter.....She has everything she could possibly want and/or need both.......And another thing alot of people do is put guys down that is fathers, like they are trash........ I know alot of moms like that as well , so ; whenever , people start talking about fathers they need to look at some of the mothers walking around ...........Especially like the ones who is like my daughter's mother that does drugs and everything else that is bad...........And besides some teenagers are better parents than some of the adults.......Look at me I was 16 and I was a better parent then my father ever could be ........He doesn't even pay for my college books ,I do everything on my own without anybody to help me......So you tell me!!!!!!!

Answer 26

The trouble with having a teenage parent is that although they can and often are good parents, they themselves are little more than children.  It might be successful, especially if they have good parental role models, but often teenagers are in this situation because they lack ambition, or confidence etc etc.  I know of many teenagers who have s*x because of pressure.  Would they be good parents?

You have to think of what children need, want and deserve.  Every child on this planet needs two loving parents, a financially and emotionally secure life in a decent home with enough to eat, decent clothes to wear and money for extras.  Few teenagers are able to provide this.  Babies need more than love - they need security, too.

Yes, I'm sure there are good teenage parents.  But have you asked your sister how hard it is?  And if she would advise it?  I bet she says she wished she'd waited until she was older.  And that's what we parents all want - our children to finish growing up before they have children.