Teenager was abducted by aliens...or hormones?

Question

My 14 year old daughter was always a very good child. now since starting puberty this year its like aliens have abducted her. She is disrespectful, doesn't do chores until she wants to go somewhere and has been pushing the limits with talking on her cell phone past curfew. We recently had an argument because I caught her talking past midnight so she screamed at me that she wanted to go live with her dad. Luckily Georgia law has changed and a 14 year old no longer has the control of making that decision on her own, the courts would decide. I am trying to teach her that in life we don't always get what we WANT but if she were to be respectful and mature and discuss and ask for things in the right way she would get farther ahead in life. I am very thankful that she has not been "hung up" on the boys yet, but I know that day is coming. Everyone else is insistent that I make her happy and let her have her way or she will rebel. Is anyone else having similar problems?

Answer 1

yes it is just a normal stage.. but you are still the parent you need to stand your grounds and explain to her that you are doing what is best for her.

Answer 2

Hormones. I went through it when I was 13. and it was a nightmare... then I learned. I will get much further if I just shut up.... Haha.

This is what worked for me.

Tell her. "That you love her... Even though you may not love me... I will never stop caring for you. I make mistakes in your life, and I know I'm not the best mother.... but I try my best and if you can't except that I'm sorry but your going to have to live with it."

It gets her to think what she has in life and don't take it forgranted.

Answer 3

omg, this is coming from a 13 year old girl,

ok yesss, hormornes are heII, blah blah blah.

but really i would just leave her alone.

i do.

we are just experirmenting with our new privliges.

screaming at her will do nothing.

i know i cant focus when i get screamed at, its like teaching a old dog new tricks, it aint going to happen,

if she wants to talk she will come to you.

listen to her, dont say any thin. if you do AGREE WITH HER. jeez.

ok im done now, i hope i helped.

Answer 4

In addition to the usual rebellion of a teenager, she is very disturbed about your pregnancy.



There are two things you must do to help:

   1. Get counseling for her (drag her if you have to) and yourself.

   2. Set rules and enforce them.  No chores done= no cell phone and/or computer use.  Nasty mouth = grounding.

Take control - it is your house.

A FAMILY IS NOT A DEMOCRACY.

Oh,and as for those who want you to let her call the shots -

either they are not parents of teen girls or their daughters are pregnant and have STD's.

Answer 5

She sounds like your average teenager. Everyone hates their parents at times. Has she started her periods yet ? If she hasn't, then you've still got the wost to come. I'm 15 and I've done a lot worse things then her so be grateful. Just let her be. She is probably finding it hard to deal with all the changes her body is going through. Perhaps it would be a good idea to have a talk with her about puberty. You said that she hasn't got all " hung up " on boys yet, so i assume she's still a virgin. I advise you to teach her about self respect etc. Has she got an older brother or sister ? Perhaps you could get them to have a word with her. I have got an older brother and i take more notice of him then i do of my parents.

Answer 6

HAHAHA........I think they took my 9 yr old with her!!!! No kidding.She has changed alot this year, not sure what it's from as 9 is very young to start puberty but not unheard of.....she can be a complete doll then 60 sec. later be crying, screaming, slamming doors, and pissed at the world! I just take it for what it is, and do not play into it, when she wants to come back and join us in a decent manner she's more than welcome.......choosing my battles is seeming to work so far!

Answer 7

Hormones are wonderful aren't they!? She will get over it eventually. Whatever you do, don't tell her that you are an adult, and she is a child! Thats what my mom told me, and it made me sooo mad! I got even more disrespectful and mean. When you are 14 you don't feel like you are a child, but you don't feel like an adult, but you want to be an adult. She is going through alot right now, and you have to respect that. Try to remember what it was like when you were 14... was it easy? And its alot harder now then it was back then! She is probably under alot of pressure. Talk to her and tell her that you know what she is going through, and that you are always here for her. Tell her that you will always love her, no matter what. And don't let her have her way all the time. Then she will expect it forever. She needs to learn that life isn't always gonna go her way. Give her some space, and some time and she will return to normal.... well as normal as a teenage girl can be!

And don't always throw it in her face that you are pregnant. She doesn't want to hear it. Sorry, but thats the truth!

xoxo Jadee♥