Question:

Tell me what ya'll think i'm not a poet so try to be nice.?

by  |  earlier

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Forever

The innocence in your eyes takes me to Heavenly skies.

The smile on your face is a gift that God gave to you, to brighten someone's day.

The laughter in your voice reminds me of the peacful sound the birds sing through out the day.

One day in your arms is like Adam was to Eve in perfect harmony.

You're more than a women I've ever dreamed of, you're a gift from God and the Heavens above.

Forever in my heart you are and will aways be, I will never leave nor depart from you.

So please place your hand in mine and walk with me together in time and love.

I pledge to you on this day and until I die, I will love you on earth and Forever, into the Heavens above.

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  1. Your poem has nice things like how the birds sing during the

    day a nice way to describe a laugh.

    It talks about love because the line forever in my heart, you are and will always be

    Its about promise because you will not depart and will give you pledge love until the day you die

    That is very romantic.

    A bit of religion because of God Adam and Eve

    I like the first line because it says innocence in your eyes

    takes me to heavenly

    they are both blue.

    The smile is like the sunshine


  2. well dreamer....this is nice....so as Michael Jackson said....I will believe....

  3. I think its perfect! How love should be. And anytime you share your heart and love your a poet.

  4. "Throughout" is all one word. And the phrase "You're more than a women I've ever dreamed of" needs to be changed a bit.  Not just "women" to "woman", the entire phrase.  But it's a good start.

  5. Well, I'm not a critic either...

    But it sounds like you "got some" and went goo-goo trying to find the words to get some more.

    Hey, good luck with that.

    g-day!

  6. This is lovely and could be used for wedding vows.  may you always feel this way.

  7. It sounds very beautiful and like your with a very lucky lady!! <3<3<3 Are you single?? JK.

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