Temper Tantrums!!!!!!!?????

Question

How do you deal with your toddlers temper tantrums? How do you correct them or what is the best way you have found to 'curb' this awful behavior!!!!!????

I have tried everything I can think of and nothing seems to work! My son is 3 and he is very stubborn, srtong willed and independent! LOL! I have tried talking to him, explaining to him that this is unacceptable behavior..I have tried time outs and even taken away toys or treats while explaining why he doesn't get to play with them...Nothing is working and I am ready to pull my hair out! He is also a SCREAMER, I might add! When he throws a tantrum he screams at the top of his lungs! It doesn't matter where we are! And yes, he gets naps and plenty of excercise and also mental stimulation...we are currently learning to identify numbers and letters...lol...

any helpful suggestions would be great - thanks in advance!

Answer 1

This worked with all three of my kids and they are all VERY STUBBORN....

Say "This is not how we behave" and walk away.  IGNORE him completely.  No eye contact.  He will scream louder, he will follow you and he may even try to climb up you.  IGNORE IT.  Just start cleaning or cooking or whatever.  Just ignore him completely.  When he does finally settle down (this may take a while...20+ minutes) then you say "This is the behavior I like" give him a hug and go play with him or read him a story.  If he is doing this in public, pick him up, say "this is not how we behave" and leave where you are at.  If at the store, leave the groceries behind.  Just go home.  

My kids had one public temper tantrum each.  After I started ignoring them, the tantrums ceased.

Good luck!!

Answer 2

IMO, tantrums are not a 'normal stage'.  Parents are just too soft these days.

Answer 3

My son just turned 3 and he used to throw tantrums. I tried everything as well. One day I just let him throw his fit, he cried and screamed for a while. He did it a few more times after that and once he relized I wasn't going to pay him any attention or baby him, he stopped.  Once in a blue moon he will throw a fit, but other then that nothing,

Answer 4

As hard as it may be at the time -- ignore him and the tantrums. He's having them because he gets a response. Even though it is a negative response, he is still getting attention because of them. My son, two, sounds similar to yours. Has tantrums when he doesn't get his way and SCREAMS bloody murder, along with flailing his arms about, sometimes will throw himself on the floor etc. But, I have found, the more I ignore him, the quicker they're over. Hopefully, some day, he'll realize that having a tantrum will get him nowhere so he'll stop throwing them.

Have you ever tried to leave the room while he's having one? My son will automatically start to follow me, the tantrum petering out, because he's not getting the reaction he wanted.

Public ones are the worst because you can't just ignore them completely. I try but when everyone in the grocery store can hear him, it's time to just pack up and leave. I have actually left a store and left whatever I was going to buy on a shelf just so we could get out of there. Pain for me as I then had to go back at a later date but what can you do?

Other tips...Don't plan things when your boy is tired or hungry. That's when the worst tantrums tend to happen.

If your son is doing something wrong in addition to the tantrum, i.e., sometimes my son will come over and hit my leg during a tantrum, then it's time for a "no hitting" comment and a trip to the time out spot.

Occasionally, when my son has been going on awhile and I'm done listening to him, I'll mention something like, "Why don't you draw Mommy a picture" or something and it distracts him enough that the tantrum abruptly stops. Of course, this goes against the ignoring part, but sometimes I'm just tired of the screaming and a distraction helps. :)

Good luck!

Answer 5

well if he has his own room i would take all things that he could play with away and make him stay inhis room and not enjoy anything for about an hour just let him scream dont let him get to you because then he will always take advantage of the fact that you give up on his punishment good luck and oh boy am i NOT ready for that stage lol mine is only 8 months but acts like he is 2 lol

Answer 6

I've been there with my son!! It is hard, embarrassing and some of his fits made me want to throw myself on the floor and scream too :-)

What really helped me with tantrums and discipline in general is the Toddler Discipline section at askdrsears.com

Not only did it help me understand what was going on in most cases, it helped me deal with him in a calm manner with out having to spank him, which I'm not for.

good luck and take care, it'll pass, I PROMISE!!

Answer 7

Hello.

My son did that for a while and I decided to not notice them. I would simply walk into another room. It took a few times and then when he realized he was not getting his way or attention he quit. He is stubborn also so it took some patience on our part but in the end it was worth it.