Terminology...wordage, etc.?

Question

I was listening to my mom repeat a funny story she heard at work. She said: "I have this 65 year old patient, who is a woman, her partner, who is also a woman, said:....."

it took me a second to realize she said, in my words "my 65 year old L*****n paitents partner said"....

I'm just wondering - is the way I would have said that offensive, or incorrect, or... I've never thought the way I word things in this respect would be offensive or politically incorrect or otherwise wrong, until I heard how my mother said it...

just looking for opinions -

Answer 1

She got it perfect.  Nowadays I almost always hear the word "partner" over girlfriend/boyfriend/husband/wife/etc (whether g*y, straight, bi, or otherwise).... then the clarification boy/girl/man/woman/etc.

Answer 2

Some people aren't comfortable with the words L*****n/g*y. And instead create politically correct ways of labeling in the conversation. In your words and your mother's the end result is the same you were both stating the women is a L*****n and her partner said. . . She was having a conversation with you so she wasn't doing it out of concern for the patients feelings but her own. I believe your way of saying it is more honest and forthright. If someone were to say to me something like your mother said I would assume my lifestyle made them uncomfortable and that in turn would make me feel uncomfortable. However, if someone came to me and told in the way you do. I would feel like they either weren't judgemental, or just didn't care. Which, to me, is much better.

Answer 3

I'm terrible at this.  If anyone looks back at my previous posts, for partner read male for gf its obvious...  I have some pre-op trans friends and will fidget with all sorts of wordage to avoid any reference to gender when talking with them (my observation is that that I'm not alone in this).

Answer 4

While I do not think the way you worded it would be wrong, but I think your mom put it more eloquently with compassion.

She is describing a person without using labels. She obviously puts a lot of thought into what she is about to say...ie- a thoughful person.

What a gal.