The big hand is on the "T" and the little is on "useday," so it's time for a little more fun, isn't it?

Question

Involved here was a brakeman and TM that didn't get along.

There was some trumped up investigation involving him and the trainmaster. Long story short, the brakey was fired before being re-hired on appeal with back pay. He wrote a ten page letter the Super, thanking him for a paid vacation far in excess of what is produced through collective bargaining. But, true to form for Dave, he availed himself of a Thesaurus and for each and every word of the letter he used one of whatever words were listed. The biggest sheister in Philly would’ve been proud.

When he got his check, he became a member of “The Three Vein Club.”

You become a member of the three vein club by getting a company official so mad that the jugular vein, the carotid artery and the vein that runs up and down a person’s forehead, are all visibly swollen and pulsating at a high rate. How’d he do it?

The goofy sob taped the check to his forehead and walked into the TM's office with it emblazoned thereupon.

Answer 1

It's Wednesday evening here where I am. LOL

Answer 2

It's Wednesday, isn't it?

Answer 3

The goofiest guy i can think of was an Oakland yardmaster they called the big banana.He was so goofy he was restricted to working the East Oakland yard.He would mess up a pickle then get on the yard speakers and scream various obscenities at you and tell you how stupid you were.Well he did it to a guy whose name shall remain a secret.Big mistake!This guy went up the tower stairs intent on killing the banana.The banana locked the door and called the p.o.'s.My nameless pal beat the glass out of the door but couldn't break the safety wire in the glass so he gave up and came back down to the shanty.P.O's showed up but we all played innocent.After they left my pal got a 60 foot engine chain and went to work.The banana always parked at the foot of the tower stairs facing out for a quick get away.He chained the differential of his car to a telephone pole right behind his car.The banana always waited til about 15 minutes after shift change to slink away.Well we all waited too.When he came down the steps my pal jumped out the shanty door and yelled now i'm gonna kill you you sob.He jumped in his car and burned out of there.He had it up to about 30 when he got to the end of that chain.The results were nothing short of spectacular.It ripped the differential right out from under that old Ford station wagon!We all went home then.The p.o's never did figure out who was guilty of that that one.The banana was a little more civil after that

Answer 4

I can't really compete with these stories. They're pretty good. I'm not going to try. But the "Goofy" thing reminded me of a guy, and I can vent it here.

Way back in the early 90s, I was a switch foreman in a large BN yard near Fargo. There was a goofy new hire named Jim. He reminded me of Jim from the old SitCom, "Taxi". He was indeed goofy, but he caught on to the job very quickly, and was pretty good. So I didn't mind working with him at all. Jim didn't have a car, and I picked him up most days for work. But soon, he had money enough from his first few paychecks to buy a car. "That's great Jim."

It's late October and starting to get very cold in North Dakota. It's not unusual to have had a couple of snow falls by Halloween. I came to work a bit anxious to see what Jim found for transportation over the weekend. It's nearly Halloween. Here he comes up to the yard office on a motorcycle.

'What the h**l are you thinking Jim?' "Yeah but", he says, "it was such a good deal. You wouldn't believe the price I got on this. I couldn't pass it up."

'Winter will be here in a few weeks Jim.'

"Yeah but, it was such a good deal. A deal like this will never happen again."

'Where ya gonna keep it? You have an apartment.'

"I keep it in the kitchen."

'Want me to pick you up for work tomorrow Jim?"

"Sure. Okay."

Jim was goofy, but a good worker. And very devoted to his crew.

Answer 5

In Dunedin, in The Stores Branch, I had a strange piece of work named Jaws.  Wore Specs, curly-haired, and dangerous in a Forklift.

Well, one day, a long green-topped table was put right next to the Goods Lift.  The Forklift was parked right in front of this, and the brakes of said vehicle were on.    So, out little sharkman got into the seat, and switched it on.

He failed to look where he was going, and, there was an almighty crash !  He had smashed into the table, and broke one of the legs !  And also managed to put a sizable dent into the Goods Lift, as well !

He also managed to "violate the Forklift", by  cracking the Radiator.  Such was the force of the impact !

Jaws was not around for too much longer.  He wound up in the Armed Forces, last I heard of him.

Probably to do far more damage !!!!!!!!

Answer 6

This isnt necessarily about anyone goofy but some of the goofy things that can happen out there.

Here's one my Dad told, goes back to the days when track inspectors were in motor cars instead of hy-rail trucks.

They came around a blind curve at about 40 MPH and right in front of them was the track inspector trying to get away but it was obvious he wasnt going to make it. The head brakeman ran out the front door of the locomotive yelling JUMP! JUMP!! but the guy was still in the speeder throwing boxes out, he finally jumped at the last minute, just before the motorcar got slammed into and demolished. He tore a pretty good chunk of hide off is head but nothing serious.

They asked him "WHAT THE h**l WERE YOU DOING?" and he said he had several cases of dynamite he was tossing off before the train hit it!