The boy behind us is autistic and is outside by himself most of the day, naked and touching himself.?

Question

My neighbors have a 4/5 year old autistic boy who is outside the majority of the time unsupervised. During this time he normally has no clothes on and touches himself and moans. They will let him outside in the am and shut the screen door and he is unattended for up to an hour at a time. They will then come out and look at him, maybe sit there for a few minutes and put his pants on but then go back inside. I don't see much interaction with him. Due to the boy being naked all the time and touching himself, I can't be outside or leave my windows open or my screen door open and I can't let my 3 year old play on her swingset because he stands there watching us with no clothes on while touching himself. The mother was just diagnosed with cancer (this all has happened long before the diagnosis) so everything has gotten worse and I feel terrible saying something. The father makes me nervous because I've seen him beat their dog and I'm afraid to say something and my husband not be home to help if there is a confrontation. I'm not sure what to do or how to handle this. I hate to call CPS but they aren't helping this boy by leaving him unattended for hours at a time and only checking on him every once in a while. I can't imagine how difficult their lives are but I hate not feeling comfortable in my own home and scared of the father.

Answer 1

Call CPS.  Think of the little boys well being.  It's ok to feel bad for the parents situation but there is no excuse for them to treat their son like a dog.

Answer 2

Are you able to speak to the kid's mom when psycho-dad isn't around? Do you know any of the kid's other relatives - grandparent, aunt, or cousin that you can speak to?  If not you have to call CPS, that is what they are there for.  You will not have to leave your name.

Answer 3

I agree with the 1st poster, children with disabilities, need extra care, attention and supervision.  Call child services, its for his own safety.  It doesn't seem like these people may be easy to speak to.  so, for him and your family call. it can be an anonymous call.  If anything I feel sorry for him, his parent suck, he deserves more attention than your average kid. Mom of 3

Answer 4

The first day I would have see him outside for more then an hour alone I would have called the police/child and youth services. There is no reason for a 4 or 5 year old boy to be alone let alone one with metal problems. I wouldn't care if the mom was just diagnosis with cancer or not, that doesn't give her a reason to be a bad mom. (even though you said it happened before that.

I wouldn't talk to the father you don't need extra stress in your life. Call CPS now! Leave them a nice message on whats going on. Next time you see him out there call the police.

Its not fair to him his mom/parents are putting him outside like that. And its not ok your not comfortable in your own home.  

Answer 5

Call CPS soon as he comes out in the AM. CPS is not going to take the child away, but may be able to help these people parent this boy. The mother and father may not realize how bad this looks, but for the sake of the boy call CPS. They have family and childrens services that can help a family like this.

Answer 6

It is probably best to call CPS for the little boys sake.  Also I would call animal control or something, as the dog does not deserve that.  

Answer 7

you need to contact the Dept of Human Services and file a report concerning neglect. i would take pictures on a digital camera of the boy left alone outside exposed and show them that too. make sure its digital b/c if you try to get any pictures developed with any type of nudity on them you will go to jail.  

Answer 8

Call the authorities.  This child needs attention and help and the family needs to be turned in.

Answer 9

So if he's 4-5 years old, why does that bother you that he's naked?  He's a preschooler for Lord's sake!

But, you are doing him no favors by not stepping in.  If his mother is unable to take care of him and the dad's beating the dog, then who knows what goes on behind a closed door.  Maybe it's better the little boy is outside by himself.  Call CPS, let them take care of it.  Ask that your name not be used - I doubt you're the only one who has called in.

Okay, let's look at it another way.  He is a little kid and is allowed to be naked in his own yard.  Right now I have been letting my 2 and 3.5 year old run around naked as they need to learn about their bodies, I so very much want them potty trained but being boys they're not too interested in or aware of their own body.  Anyway, my 3.5 year old is as big as a 5-6 year old - and is often mistaken as one.  He's not, he's 3.  I would not care if CPS showed up at my door, I would let them in and let them talk to my kids - because I know nothing I am doing is wrong and transparency is a good thing.  Well, I'd put a diaper on those behinds before CPS talks to them - I am tired of cleaning up in the house, the yard is bad enough.  

If they have nothing to hide they will be glad that folks care enough to make sure their child is okay, if not they are hiding something.  If there is a confrontation, walk away, close and lock your door and call the cops.  It's that simple - most folks will not confront someone they don't know or don't know well.

Answer 10

Call child services! Children with disabilities have certain rights.

Answer 11

This is child neglect, & in the case of the father beating their dog - animal abuse ! - Report them 2 the proper authorities B 4 things get worse & some 1 gets hurt - then U would really feel bad 4 NOT reporting them !

Answer 12

I would call CPS.  I don't think the parents have to know that you were the one turning them in.  This poor little boy.  This makes me sad.  He needs some help.

Answer 13

I would not say anything directly. I would call CPS that is what they are here for. They will take care of it in a discrete manner and they can probably keep your identity private.  

Maybe they just need education or some support system. The child probably needs some developmental therapy. Just cause he's autistic doesn't mean he can't be educated or engaged to some degree. I'm sure the state could help with that and then maybe the family could get a break and thus become a bit less stressed and maybe less dysfunctional.

God forbid the mother ends up hospitalized or worse and this violent father is left to care for him. At least there would be monitoring going on.

They definitely need a home study done. Please get involved no matter how uncomfortable it makes you feel.

Good luck.

Answer 14

Go with your instincts, call CPS. That sounds really weird!

Answer 15

I would call CPS just so they can check that out. If the boy is not being taken care of properly they need help. Its sad to hear about the mother but they have to remember the boy needs to be looked after properly and specially if he has his own special needs!  

Answer 16

If I were you, I'd be calling somebody. It sounds like confronting the issue directly might not be a good solution, given that you are concerned about your safety in doing so. I agree that they are not doing the child any good by leaving him by himself for so long, especially given his condition. Most children at 4 and 5 don't understand that there's any big deal to being naked, and/or touching themselves, let alone an autistic boy. He needs to have someone responsible to encourage him away from those behaviours.

I am a little wary of the father beating the dog too. While this is all pure conjecture, who is to say he won't hit the boy at some point? With an autistic son and a wife diagnosed with cancer, it's understandable he will get frustrated at times and quite possible that he will act out. CPS will, at the least, keep an eye on the situation and hopefully give you some peace of mind. I wouldn't feel bad about calling them, as it is clear that you are concerned about the child.

Answer 17

I know you hate the feeling of having to call CPS, but you will be 'saving' this child from the neglect that he is obviously getting. And I would call Animal Rescue (you can get their number from a vet), and let them know that you have witnessed this man beat up on his dog. That is illegal and he can go to jail for it. That is animal abuse and is taken very seriously. Call both places. I urge you for the sake of the child, and animal who is obviously living in an abusive home. And the call is anonymous. Your name will not be given out.  

Answer 18

honestly i think that is something for CPS. You should get a video camera and tape it to give to them so they have proof. it is all anonymous. but no child should be left outside unsupervised especially an autistic one. If you are afraid of the father dont say anything just hand over a tape to CPS. it will be in the childs best interest. hes not getting what he needs. and that touching himself is disgusting. too young for all that. best of luck.

Answer 19

maybe talk to child services?