The ditzy Blondes: Paris Hilton and the ICC
Paris Hilton is a woman, who has made her mark in history. The media loves her, the police love her, the fans love her and there you have it - one big happy family. Before she was to embark in Virgin Galactic, the first ever commercial space flight, Paris
was worried.
"I'm very scared to do it. What if I don't come back? With the whole light years thing, what if I come back 10,000 years later, and everyone I know is dead? I'll be like, 'Great. Now I have to start all over.”
Many have however admitted that Paris takes the dumb blonde card a bit too far. Sometimes, it simply gets frustrating, and despite her sexuality, it really does get unnerving. The International Cricket Council has replicated Hilton’s model of success by
acting like a ditzy blonde time and again.
The fact of the matter is that the ICC has failed to tackle the problem of corruption that has now infested the roots of cricket’s governing body. After the match -fixing fiasco that hit international cricket like a frozen dump falling from the sky at 120
miles an hour, cracking the protective wind screen of its Ferrari back in 2001, cricket’s governing body stood bare and vulnerable. However over time, they managed to window dress the cracks and crevices in the system by coming up with flashy appealing names
for their adhoc committee’s such as the “ACSU” the “CDP” and many others. The underworld dons and bookies felt tickled. No, it did not manage to send a shiver down their spines.
Under the watchful eyes of the ICC, they continued to operate with the shorter format of the game, becoming nothing more than a “bet fest” for bookies from all over the world who gained easy access to international stars and cricket players. With the ICC
Anti Corruption and Security Unit note ‘SECURITY’, many would have thought that this undercover army of James Bond and his men would surely protect the sportsmen from shady characters in the underworld. However, little did anyone know that these special security
team were equipped with water guns.
Paul Condon, the former head of the ACSU, warned that “the IPL brings with it the biggest threat in terms of corruption in the game since the days of cricket in Sharjah.”
However, the ACSU has been operating like the local police of an Indian soap opera, where the police arrive exactly when the burglars have left, nay escaped and the action has all taken place. ICC has also started to read their fair share of newspapers and
magazines and oh boy, does it get excited when they read a British Tabloid with ‘goosy jossip’.
As they skim down the tabloid pages, they come across truly entertaining news ‘Lindsay unleashed in lacy lingerie shoot,’ reads one headline. ‘Lucy Pinder gets all lathered up,’ reads another and an exciting new day dawns upon the ICC. They come across many
more ‘goosy jossip’ with tempting videos of ‘Fergies dirty deal’ and ‘Cheryl’s dirty dance’. Occasionally, they also come across other news such as politician ‘Tom Sheridan engaging in group s*x, and attending a swingers club in Manchester’. What eludes their
watchful eye however, is many of these stories end up in lawsuits but nonetheless they do make compelling stories. Fact or fiction, who cares?
The ACSU comes alive however when on the same British Tabloid, they read the highly sensational headlines about http://www.senore.com/Cricket/Pakistan-c755 cricket embroiled in a spot-fixing fiasco, or bookies playing Paul the Octopus for predicting the scoring patterns of a Pakistan cricket
match. If it were up to the same tabloid newspaper, they would have Paul the Octopus behind the bars for bribing football (soccer) players.
Where was the ICC when the bookmakers were approaching the sportsmen during their games? Where was the ACSU and the infamous ‘Security’ unit the ICC formed? The fact of the matter is that the ICC and the ACSU have failed miserably. Giving the sense a fall
sense of hope, that fixing was buried deep and the ICC has taken strict action against the players, when in fact the ICC in itself is relying on tabloids and their questionable authenticity to base their investigations on?
If this has to be the scenario, then no one and we mean no body has the right to call Paris Hilton a ditzy blonde, since the ICC is not far behind in this race.
(The writers’ opinions are independent and bear no resemblance to Bettor.com’s editorial stance)
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