The problem with teachers and students.?

Question

Why do people have such a problem with students and teachers that get married? I mean it makes sense that a student and teacher couldn't be in a relationship while they were both at the same school, but even if the age difference isn't that big, it's as if that person being a teacher marks them as off-limits until the other is like 40.

WHY?

Answer 1

It is called In Loco Parentis, and it does not expire after the student leaves the school in many places.

As a teacher, students are totally off-limits, though I have been propositioned by an ex-student (once, quite some years ago).  I was surprised myself, but then there are many ways to get out of such a propostion.  I also covered myself by reporting it to the school just in case there was any come-back.

I have a position of responsibility, and getting involved with students is usually illegal where I am.  If I were to meet a girl who went to a school where I was a teaccher, and I did not know her when I was there (certainly possible in bigger schools), then it might be okay.  Mind you, she would have to want a mid-30's British bloke.

If she were from a different school, one where I never taught, that makes it legal as long as she above the age of consent and is not still in school.  I no longer teach but am registered, so it would still be an issue I would need advice on.

Answer 2

I don't know your age, but from your question, I'm assuming you are still in school yourself, under 18. Well, the teacher is the adult, and the student is the child. Now I know, being a school bus driver and not that far older than the high school students on my bus, that high schoolers act as though they feel that they have finally fully matured and are already adults and capable of making adult decisions. I hate to break it to you, your body has most likely fully matured, but your brain has not. You are probably wondering, how do I know this for sure, did I read it in some book full of psycho babble? No, I observe the behavior of high schoolers everyday and I can clearly see the difference now that I'm older. Consider how you felt in elementary school, you didn't feel less immature than your fellow classmates, but when you went to high school, you see other elementary children as merely little children and very immature. That is the same for highschoolers, they are not as mature as they think they are, they ARE NOT adults yet. ALL that being said, if a teacher has a relationship with a student, they are molesting a child and I would even label them a pedefile. Consider this, if you are a highschooler, would you want to date an elementary student? There are people like that in the world, but it isn't normal or right. Even though your body has matured to where you desire a relationship and it seems pleasurable to be with a good looking teacher,whereas it would be traumatizing if an adult were to mess with a child that hasn't hit puberty, there are still unforseen complications. It seems as though it were but a gray area. Your desires, priorities, plans for the future, many things will change as you age. You wanted to play with dolls and toys as a child, you think it's cool to sleep with or have a romantic relationship with a teacher as a teenager, but how will it affect your future? Better yet, how will it affect you psychologically and in the long run?  

Answer 3

The problem isn't the age difference (ie; I had teachers when I was in Year 12 and 17 who were younger than my bf at the time) but rather the power imbalance which exists in a student-teacher relationship.

A lot of students in their teens are just beginning to understand the world and learn about the opposite s*x, and a teacher or any adult really, preying on that is predatory.

Even once the student has left the school, there could still be an imbalance there.  I know for instance when I occassionally bump into old high school teachers, or even old lecturers from uni, I still treat them with the same respect as I did when I was a student.

Answer 4

Because a teacher is in a position of trust and authority, they are the responsible one with the most power at that stage. A teacher who ends up with a student is usually the most socially inept of people.

Answer 5

i hate school so much

Answer 6

Even if their age is close. I think its wrong because well first they teach them. They could give them different grades, grades they don't deserve because the teacher likes the student more than others. And who knows what they do during school. My opinion its a bit weird. Even if the teacher isn't that much older than the student. They should just wait and graduate then decide.

Answer 7

Well I don't have a problem with it as long as both are of age and both are not student and teacher to each other. then they can get married.. when of age they have to make their own choices. Nobody should tell them. We are responsible for our own choices .. so if it works out well then that's great and if not.. then one learned a lesson..  I believe in any case that both have to be of age.. and not teacher and student to each other.. for all else, do as you please!