The right age for children?

Question

I know I am too young right now to have kids, but what do you think is the right age to start having kids? My one 'calling' in life is to be a mom and that's all I've wanted to do since I was very little. I have names picked out, ect. I want to have alot of kids but I'm not sure how I would be able to pull off just being a 'mom' as a job unless I have a wealthy husband. Any suggestions/comments? Thank you! All are appreciated!

Answer 1

No right age. If your in a good relationship, and have a place, don't have a problem paying the bills then go for it! Simple as that. If you want to be a stay at home mom...move to a cheaper area to live. Thats what i did. Moved from Vegas to Tennessee at 17, got married, had my daughter at 18, bought our house when I was 19, had our second at 21, and will be having our third and last at 22. House is gaining equity, and we are sitting pretty on my husbands 700-800/week take home pay. We have insurance(expensive in Tennessee....but everything elae is dirt cheap), we have a newer vehicle (06 toyota), bills are all paid on time....savings, house is going to be paid off in under 10 years. AGE is irrelevant. Financial responsibility is the largest factor in making things work well. Most people can't pay their bills with 2 people working....go figure right. Budget like I do 1 year in advance, adjust monthly...stick to it, and enjoy. College being a top of the list priority is a JOKE if you want to be a stay at home mom....why waste the time or money. Not to mention a LOT of college degrees don't pay any better than regular non degree jobs! How many people went to college and are living paycheck to paycheck.....a TON of them! If you go to college research everything about the job ops, and pay post college, BEFORE selecting a field to go into. Because a lot of times it's a waste of time/money, and just leaves you in debt, miserable, making the same as people that don't go to college. Around 50% of degrees are like this in outcome. So be wise in picking a field of study if you go.

Edit* I'm not "belittling" college...simply stating a fact that a lot of people don't check on when going into a specific area of study...and then find out when it's time to get a job, that they aren't making any more than the average joe. College is a great idea...IF you do your homework before hand, and know your job op status and income level. Otherwise it CAN be a harsh slap in the face after spending 4+ years in school, and barealy surviving. For example Lpn's over Nurses. Lpn's in most places are making around 10-20 an hour...no better than the average person. Waste of time. Nurses are making double that...worth the time. There are tons of examples like that out there. Another good one off of the link you provided...my husband makes more than the average teacher...and he is working in a bread factory as a machine operator. Hired throught a temp agency 4 years ago. His cousin is the Ceo of an FBI software company making 3 figures a year...no college...same thing got hired on origionally through a temp service pushing papers. Now 10-15 year later(not sure exactly haven't asked what year he was hired through the temp)...he's running the show! Most of the wealthiest people on Earth didn't go to college at all, or untill after they had already made it big. College is great, and I am not disputing that....I'm just pointing out that everyone focussing solely on "go to college" and not saying "inform yourself on your career possibilities", half the times means wasted time/money.

Answer 2

The right age is when you're married and financially stable (at least enough for expenses, insurance, and an emergency fund should the car break down or someone lose their job or so on).  I don't know how old you are, but definitely finish high school, ideally finish college, get a job, save some money, find the right guy, get married, and then go for it.  Even if all you want to do is be a mom, there's a lot you need to learn and experience to do it well.  Focus hard on your education.  It will serve you well in raising your child and being a role model for them, for helping to educate them, and for navigating the things you need to navigate to be a good parent (advocacy with the schools for special education plans, dealing with medical problems, etc).  The worst thing you can do is think that since all you want to do is be a parent that there's no need to develop other skills and interests.

Picking out names and so on before you've even found the guy can be a fun pasttime but has nothing to do with the real kids you'll actually have (whose names have to sound good to both you and your husband; the kids might not be the gender you expect, either, and fertility doesn't come easily to everyone).  You may still want a lot of kids when you have one or two, but you may also totally change your mind based on finances, fertility issues, your spouse's preference, your own realization of how much time they take up, a kid with special needs, etc.  Fantasies are fun, but before you're ready for kids you need to be grounded in reality.  If you're interested in kids, spend time with kids.  Babysit, learn about child development, consider a career in education or something.  That will all help you out when you're a mom (as well as help you realize what you'd be getting into).  

Good luck with your family one day.

edit -- just in response to the person belittling college, check out these statistics: http://usgovinfo.about.com/library/weekl...  Your kids' teachers, your kids' pediatrician, etc. will also take you more seriously if you have the educational background to meet them at their level, and you will always be in a better position should your plans to be a sahm go awry (as they do for many people).  A college degree or higher is certainly not a waste ... even if you're a sahm while your kids are young, the vast majority of mothers will re-enter the workforce when their kids are in school.

Answer 3

The best time to have kids is when you're graduated from college, mature, married and financially & mentally ready. That way you'll be doing your best to give your child the best quality of life possible. Any mom owes that to their child!

Answer 4

there's no right age it is when you ready. but please be out of school

Answer 5

no right age

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;...

Answer 6

I think its good to have experienced life a while. You should be with the person you plan on spending the rest of your life with, or that you are confident anyways it will probably last. You have to spend some time as an adult (that is, not living as a child, under your parents roof, making your own money and your own decisions and supporting yourself). From that point on, whenever it suits. I had an unplanned pregnancy at 22, and I was ready to settle down with my boyfriend at the time (who was older than me, most 22 year old 'boys' would not be ready) and we could support our family.

Answer 7

It's different for every person. It depends on what you want and are ready for.

It's not as hard being a SAHM with a lower-middle income husband as it sounds.

As a family with a SAHM you have fewer expenses, have a lower tax bracket, lower commuting and work-related expenses, don't have to pay for child care and can shop smarter than working moms. Studies have shown that unless you make more than 100K combined, those factors mean that it's almost as cheap or cheaper to live on one income than two.

For me 21 was right (I met the right guy, we've been married 19 years), I did college after my kids were in school full-time. I value the time and energy I was able to give my kids, rather than the money and things my aunt, who did the career/older mom path, gave her kids.

Frankly, my kids turned out better than hers, mine are going to college, hers are more likely headed for jail because they only thing they learned to value was the things that money can buy. One barely managed to graduate high school, the other has been expelled from a half-dozen schools. She's running out of schools that will take him.

It also makes more sense to me to do the kids first, go to college and start a career, than do school and a career, take time off for kids, then have to get retrained and try to re-start a career once the kids are older.

However, it's not an easy plan. You have to meet the right partner at the right time. That doesn't work out for everyone.