Question:

There is no room for selfish individual in a marriage.?

by | earlier

Me and my wife our having marriage problems. I told my wife that she is selfish putting her needs first in stead of thinking about us as a couple and figuring out how we can work this out as a couple. I told her and this is my opinion that in order for a marriage to be successful you cant be selfish, there is no room in a marriage for it. She told me that she have selfish tendency but she not selfish. What do you make of this situation?

Tags:

Report

Answer The Question I've Same Question Too

Follow Question

16 ANSWERS

Sort By: Date | Rating

depends on what you think she is being selfish about; you are still two individuals with different interests and needs......
Report (0) (0) | earlier
Perhaps you should talk specifically about what you see is so selfish. Maybe telling her how her selfish deeds are affecting you specifically. I'm sure she loves you, and does not want you to be miserable. After all, you didn't marry her to only worry about her needs right. You guys should work as a team on your communication to find the root of the "selfishness."
Report (0) (0) | earlier
We all have selfish tendencies, but I agree with you that selfishness breaks down and can ruin marriages.
Report (0) (0) | earlier
lol, rick is hitting on you... he wants to take you for 'drinks'

Report (0) (0) | earlier
Neither of you should be selfish in your marriage. I think everyone has some selfish tendencies, but they usually check those tendencies and take into consideration the other person's thoughts and feelings. Your wife told you she doesn't think she's being selfish, so I guess you two need to keep talking, since you obviously think she is. Maybe it would help to try to see things from each other's perspectives. Marriage is sometimes give and take and compromise when called for. It's easier when both partners put the other first. Good luck!
Report (0) (0) | earlier
All people have selfish tendencies from time to time.
Report (0) (0) | earlier
runn man run you are in or a world of hurt beleive me no matter how much you give she will take more until you are mentally drained of emotion and strengh truelly selfish people do know and dont care and usually deny that they are it is a severe character flaw lots of folks have most the time we think it will pass or we can make it better you can not it dont work
Report (0) (0) | earlier
Consistently selfish behavior will ruin a marriage, but it's not always 50/50 all the time... If you stay married for a long time, you're both going to go through selfish periods from time to time... Sometimes you just have to wait for it to pass and sometimes there are things you can do to help meet your spouses needs so they don't have to be so selfish...
Report (0) (0) | earlier
Marriage is a partnership

To make the business (marriage)successful

Both partners (husband & wife) in the corporation must , be honest, reliable, share, communicate , solve problems, be a team player (work together) respect and have great love for each other and be commit ed to work toward successful goals for the betterment of their business (marriage)

There is no place for selfishness in marriage

The sign was there when you dated !

You did not pay attention!

Did She had the ' selfish tendency before marriage?

What's the difference

Any who.. selfish tendency manifests into selfishness

You are or you are not !

Counseling is required for you guys

She is a slick talker (the tendency bit)

Is this embarrassing for you in front of other people?

Is she bossy ? Loud? Are you wimpy ?

Report (0) (0) | earlier
It sounds like she's trying to get off on a verbal technicality. If actions speak louder than words, would a selfish action not be selfish?
Report (0) (0) | earlier
I agree there is no room for selfishness in a marriage, but there is a time for it.  On my Birthday, I am selfish and my Husband expects it and I love it, b/c for 1 day it's all about me, but then I turn it back off and go back to normal.

Next time you have the discussion, bring up 2 or 3 examples of what she did and explain why that hurt you or your relationship.  If she wants to continue thinking only of herself, let her know that when 1 is divorced and single, then it is all about them.  Maybe she'll get the hint.
Report (0) (0) |   earlier
She IS selfish and you are right!
Report (0) (0) | earlier
I agree you cannot be selfish when you are with someone.. it just wont work.
Report (0) (0) | earlier
she's selfish, hey let's go get a drink and talk about it...
Report (0) (0) | earlier
It happens from time to time. Give an take. Let her have her small period of her needs and she should do the same for you. And compromise.
Report (0) (0) | earlier
You're right and she's wrong. Period.
Report (0) (0) | earlier