These girls make me so annoyed and worried for my daughters sake

Question

I was at the mall yesterday and I was so annoyed by this one particular group of girls. They were a bit on the heftier side and they were dressed very scantly. They were very very loud and obnoxious as well. They were acting as if they were these super s**y playboy bunnies. I have nothing again people with a bit of weight, however I have a problem with people who do not wear an adequate amount of clothing to cover things that people in general dont want to see. It's one thing when you are at home, or at your friends/boyfriends homes. But in very public places it annoys me. And I admit what I am about to say might sound terrible, but I really do not mean it hurtfully. I understand that there are some people who are obese due to medical problems, but this is not usually obvious to strangers. I have a young daughter and although I would never encourage her to be extremely thin, I will howevere encourage her to eat healthfully and exercise. I feel like these girls are a bad example to yuong girls. I don't want my daughter to see these unhealthy/obese girls looking a bit S****y and getting any attention from any guys an then having her think it is ok to look like that (as much as in the persons actual control). It is not healthy to be obese/very large, and I think it sends that wrong message that it is ok. Anyone else?

Answer 1

and you're worried about this, why? because you have a fat girl complex and now you are going to give your daughter one too? great job! maybe you'll be on here in a few months asking how to deal with her anorexia.

"I'd rather her be judgement towards fat people so that way maybe they will feel bad ans stop shoving their faces" LOL are you even listening to yourself?! this is just a rant!

Answer 2

Honestly, I agree with you.  

I know I don't want to see teenage, S****y heffers letting it 'all hang out'.

Seriously.  I don't.

But as far as your own daughter goes, keep teaching her to be healthy not 'thin'.  It's not the size of the person, it's how they portray themselves.  Character is a good thing.

Answer 3

WOW!!! You've left me kind of speechless. Unless you paid for their clothing, you might want to be quiet and mind your own business. Yes, we all want our kids to eat healthy and make wise choices, but you can't be with them 24/7. And besides, what makes you think that aside from medical reasons, all "obese" people are that way due to overeating and lack of exercise?? There are some people who eat right and exercise and STILL can't loose the weight. I'm sorry, but I feel bad for your child. She has a mother who is so judgemental of everyone else. You might want to take a look in the mirror, we all have flaws.  

Answer 4

you can't control the public or what others wear so just relax a bit.  teach your daughter that everyone is different and in your house, you will not allow scanty clothes.

also teach her to accept others and accept that she cannot control everything and everyone.

Answer 5

Frankly, I think YOU are the one sending the wrong message.  I'm all for teaching modesty and healthy living but PLEASE tone down your emphasis on looks.  The idea that you don't think heavy girls deserve attention from guys!?!  With that kind of attitude, you are setting your daughter up for developing an eating disorder or at least, being shallow, vain and judgmental.  Or she could go the other way and get really fat just to spite you.  You are not setting up a healthy environment for her in this area.  

Answer 6

Psh, I like my curves. I'm not huge, but I'm definitely not skinny. I don't dress scantily, but I still am proud of my body.

Answer 7

are you serious? do you know what makes me worried for your daughters sake? YOU!!!!! with all the problems that are going on in the worlds, and no doubt around you, you manage to focus on a couple of kids having fun at the mall because they don't fit neatly in to your body image category. id be VERY CAREFUL how you speak to your daughter about these matters, if you drum into her how you think its the be all and end all to have a slim frame then you will more than likely trigger off an eating disorder, how would an anorexic, bulimic child fit into your vision of our future generation. i hope for your childs sake that you stop to think about this and change your attitude, and that you havent done too much damage already.  

Answer 8

I agree with most of the comments you've received already! Its people like you that make this world a scary place to let my daughter grow up in! I cannot believe that this is coming from a mother of a young daughter! As a mother of 2 girls I cannot imagine this being my cause to take a stand against! What is wrong with you?

Answer 9

Personally i think you need to quit judging other people and worry about your own kids

Answer 10

I think you should focus on teaching healthy eating and exercise to your daughters and never comment on someone else's weight -- acceptable to you or not. If you model looking at other people's bodies and judging them for that, they may well develop an eating disorder, while if you focus on teaching your values to your children and minding your own business when it comes to everyone else, they will grow up with good values instilled in them and have the brains to discern what is and what is not a great idea for clothing or behavior in public and will make you proud by being who they are.

Would you really want your daughter at size 8 to be trying to slim down to a size 4 because she wants to fit some artificial ideal? Do you want your daughters to be insecure about their bodies if they get a little pre-adolescent chubbiness before they shoot up in height or have some weight fluctuation due to hormones?

What if they develop acne or a pear shape or some other supposedly undesirable feature? Will they have the insecurity you have instilled in them, or will they realize that people come in all shapes and sizes and their healthy attitude and habits are what matters?

I hope you will consider minding your own business and not instilling insecurity in your daughters by pointing out flaws in other people.

Answer 11

you are truly dumb as h**l...if you are judging these young women like this.  

Answer 12

What the h**l is your question? All I'm reading is BLAH BLAH BLAH. Hope you get a grip on life so your children are not scarred from the insanity here. Sounds like you have issues with your self or you would not be obsessing over some chunky kids get over it already. Your negative attitude towards others will rub off on your children.

Answer 13

Wow, that is a loaded question and it sounds like you're catching alot of heat for it! I am a mother of two ver young girls, I'm overweight, but working on it. I would NEVER dress in inappropriate clothing due to my weight, I would NEVER teach my children that it was okay to wear so little clothing, wether they are large or not. I don't think it's wrong for you to feel like this, everyone has a right to their own opinion and I deffinately see your point. Be sure and teach your child that appearance is deffinately not all that matters, however, it is important to take great care of your body and stay healthy with good hygeine. Good Luck!

Answer 14

Yeah teach your child appearance is all that matters.  Good job mom thumbs up!  You're sending her a great message!

Answer 15

I don't think them being overweight will send the wrong message to your daughter.  As long as you feed her healthy food, she'll learn that from you, not other people.  My mom always instilled healthy habits in us and of course as teens we went out and ate fast food, but that wasn't everyday.  I grew up a healthy weight, and I'm still a healthy weight.  I think it's the children who grow up in a household that have parents with unhealthy eating habits and pass that onto their children.   That's where they learn it from.  Not these overweight teens who dress inappropriately.  I can't see them saying "oh, she's fat and dressed s**y, look at all the guys looking at her, I think I'll go eat alot and get fat."   I know in HS, we had girls like that and sure guys paid attention to them.  But I looked at them, and thought what is the deal here, they look horrible and I would never want to look like way.  I want a guy to like me because of me, not because I wear S****y clothes.  

As far as these overweight girls dressing like that, I totally agree with you.  I would think if they were given a picture of themselves dressed that way, looking horrible, they would think twice.  I know if I wore a dress that I *thought* looked great, then saw a picture of myself looking way too fat in it, I would never wear that dress again!  And as far as the guys paying attention to them, its probably because their big b***s are sticking out!

Answer 16

So all of that BS just to sugar coat you resent overweight people. S****y clothing is not even the issue, because "at least they have the body for it".

Looks are not everything, and you are case in point. I cannot even see what you look like yet you appear ugly to me.

How can they be watching TV all day if they are at the mall? LOL

Answer 17

first of all..were you fat as a child and got made fun of or something? Secondly dressing S****y is just as disgusting on someone weighing 115 pounds and a size 6 as it is on someone weighing 200 pounds and a size 18...what the h**l does it matter what size they are. Are you saying its ok for your young thin daughter to dress S****y or are you trying to make her dress appropriatly. i'm really confused. tell me this..at 13-14 are they buying their own groceries? nope ...its the parents buying mcdonalds and oreos. when they are moved out they have a say in what groceries are bought. i'm happy with my size 20 after 3 kids! my husband loves me and thats all that matters. you have serious issues with appearance...i feel bad for your daughter

Answer 18

With your attitude towards people that you deem as not being "perfect", I worry that you're going to push your daughter into developing an eating disorder.

Weight and looks are not all that make a person beautiful. Now, I don't know how those girls were dressed- it really doesn't matter if they're heavy or not, ALL girls need to know that it's inappropriate to dress like a street walker- I agree with that. I just hope you're not saying that it's ok for thin girls to dress like s****s, but it's not ok for heavier girls to do so.

Yes, it's a good idea to teach your child to make smart choices in her diet and exercise, but it's wrong to make her or anyone else feel bad about their body.

I think any woman should be entitled to dress tastefully s**y no matter what her body looks like. Confidence is more beautiful than having a 22" waist. You're criticizing these girls, but I wonder if it's YOU with the confidence problem.

By the way- how do you know what nutrition and exercise choices these girls are making? Some people naturally carry a little extra weight.  I'm guessing you're a supermodel that walks on water- as for the rest of us, we're HUMAN. I wouldn't want my daughter befriending your daughter if she's going to treat people the way you do.