This has always bothered me? Am I wrong?

Question

I don't get why people are so enamored with Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt for adopting so many children....Now don't get me wrong. I think Adopting is a wonderful thing, but I just don't get why they have to adopt children from other countries when we have so many abandoned, orphaned and abused children right here in the United States? I understand that there are children in other countries that need our help and I am completelty simpothetic to them....if I had the money I would send it over....just why can't they help here before there?

Answer 1

In response to those metioning cost factors, Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt need not worry about that. Anyway, adopting from US foster care is usually free,.

I agree with several previous posters in that the poor in our country are still several times more cared for than orphans in third world countries. Many, many (in the thousands) children in Guatemala live in the trash dump and pick trash to eat and build shelters..having to fight with stray dogs for scraps of rotting food. In many countries orphans simply roam the streets begging. A child in a foster home in the US has state paid medical care, shelter, food, and an education.

I think at least some people that adopt from overseas are moved by a number of factors to choose that route.

Answer 2

I hear you.  Let's take care of our own first, then worry about the rest of the world.

Answer 3

I COMPLETELY agree with you.  I don't get it.  It seems as if she's collecting third-world children.  

For anyone who thinks she's a goddess savior of children, read how she feels about her and Brad Pitt's child Shiloh:

http://www.hipandpop.com/angelina-isnt-f...

http://fametastic.co.uk/archive/20070109...

For all those who won't bother to read the links:

Angelina Jolie told UK Elle that she has more feelings for Maddox and Zahara because "they are survivors."  She calls her own child privileged--and without personality--and pays more attention to the one's adopted from other countries because of "the life the may have lived" there.

Nice, huh?

Answer 4

Because the foster care system in this country is so messed up. We've been trying for over a year to adopt, and we've had a couple of placements.

We had two little girls come in, the older one was 4, and every time I moved too close to her, she took cover like I was going to hit her or something. She also had her foot burnt intentionally my her mom. They went back to mom.

The other two, who are still in foster care (but not here. we want permanency, and these two are most likely going back) they came into care because the little girl had a head injury "consistent with hair pulling." This child has hair almost down to her butt, and when I was coming her hair for church one Sunday, I had some hair near the ends in my hand dangling it, and the child took off like a rocket. Fortunately, I caught her before her hair got pulled, but how was that kid's hair pulled? I'm pretty sure it wasn't malicially.

And the two who's mom intentally burns her kid's toes and exposes them to people who have no contact orders due to history of violence and are obviously abused...they're home. They should be here. The other two should be sleeping at home with Mommy and Daddy in the next room!

Answer 5

I think its because a lot of people feel as if the United States is the most wealthiest and liberated countrys; comparing to Africa, India, and other poor countrys that can not really offer much to children. Like most people have said, the United States is the only country that people go hunting on a full stomach.

Answer 6

Oh my goodness.  I had to stop reading the responses to this question before I got SICK!!  Those who responded in AGREEMENT with the poster apparently have never looked into adopting in any shape or form!  Because all I read were "guesses" not FACTS.  

The truth is OF COURSE there are lots of children in the United States that need families.  My question to you guys that posted against all of us who are FOR international adoption is this:  WHY DON'T YOU ADOPT THEM?  If it is THAT EASY and THAT CHEAP then go for it!  Get your check book out and start writing.  Go to the department of social services and pick you one out!  I mean, by the way you guys talk its the AMERICAN thing to do!  RIGHT?  

Now let me tell you MY side of the story.  My husband and I have two children biologically.  We took in a biracial little boy who needed a foster family.  We fell in love with him instantly.  Needless to say we wanted to adopt him.  His mother was in prison and his father was WHO KNOWS WHERE.  He lived with us for a few months when we found out that the mother changed her mind about who the father was.  This put a "kink" in the adoption plan.  But we carried on.  THEN she decided that she didn't want to sign the papers.  She didn't want him though....she just didn't show up to sign the papers to give up parental rights.  We found out that we would have to endure court for about a 2 year process to get the rights taken away legally.  HOWEVER, during this time, if she showed any interest in him she could take him back....even if it was in the final stage!  This meant we could raise him til he was 3 YEARS OLD only to have him go back to his mother who hadn't seen him since he was an infant!!!  

I couldn't do it.  The lady was NUTS!  I had two other children to think about.....they were already bonding.  They would be totally  CRUSHED to have their little brother taken from them when he turned 3 if she decided to do that.  So, we gave him up to his biological grandmother and I went into a DEEP depression.  

A few months later we were contacted by a young couple who heard we were thinking of adopting.  They wanted to meet us.  They were about to have a baby girl. After we filed all the paperwork and spoke to a lawyer.  The mother decided she didn't know if she could go through with it or not.  I told her I understood and to just let us know....we would wait.  They called us two weeks later and said they decided to go ahead with the adoption.  But by this time I was a little nervous.  I had spoken to our lawyer and he said that the mother would have 6 months EVEN AFTER THE BABY WAS BORN AND IN OUR HOME that she could change her mind and take back the baby girl.    

Once again, I could not deal with that.  I understood the rights of the mother.  But I also knew that I could only take so much.  And taking care of and rocking and feeding and loving a baby girl for 6 months in my home, only to have her taken away from me....especially after what happened with the little boy only a few months before...well that would be TOO MUCH.  So we backed out of the adoption.

By this time, I'm thinking that there is no way I can adopt without taking a chance of getting my heart broken.  Then we saw a picture of a little boy in Guatemala with big brown eyes.  We found out that he had been found in a village, starving to death.   He was already 2 years old.  Most people want to adopt babies when they internationally adopt, so this boy didn't have much of a chance to be adopted.  I knew INSTANTLY he was MY BOY!  There was just a connection.

Was the adoption EASIER?  HAHAHAHA  NO WAY.  I've never seen so much red tape in all my life.  Oh my GOSH!!

Was the adoption cheaper?  HECK NO!  $30,000 +  but God provided

Did we adopt internationally because we wanted a "perfect" child?  UM NO....we adopted our child without knowing ANYTHING about him.  He has NO HISTORY.  They asked us if we wanted him tested for AIDS.  I told them "it doesn't matter" he's our son no matter WHAT!  (As for the comment by a poster about "adopters" not wanting "hearing impaired/deaf kids"....I got one of those with my bio son....didn't have to adopt one!  And guess what, he's STILL a blessing!!!!)

I could go ON and ON.  Adoption is a blessing to the adopted child and the adopting parent no matter WHAT country the child or parent is from.  What does it matter?  Adoption is giving a child a home!!  PERIOD!!  For those of you who want to criticize, I really don't think you have any room to talk UNLESS you've actually adopted!!

Answer 7

the process in the united states for some folks is very daunting. they dont feel comfortable with the state getting all up in their business. its easier to adopt in foreign contries they practically give kids away.

Answer 8

does it really matter where the child is from, just as long as that child is provided a home. Come on! It saddens me to hear this "help our own" first. Many people choose not to adopt from the US, and that is their right. Let's focus on the child not where they come from.

Answer 9

I agree with "Islander" down below...We should consider kids in all nations as "OURS" instead of "Yours" and "Mine"...A child...no matter what race, color, creed, should always be first priority, however, it's sad, and virtually impossible unless we all stop "yapping'" and get off our butts and start "doing" , to fix the gargantuan problem of 100% adoption....as far as Angie and Brad, it makes sense to adopt from other countries! They're planning on creating little leaders who one day will grow up and rule their nations proudly and perfectly...without strife,famine, hatred....it will be the next perfect society of elevated people...like "Atlantis"  or the Egyptians, but more conducive to joy and happiness...of rats, I told the secret!!!

Answer 10

I know they should worry about the kids we have here. I heard that she was going to adopt a boy from here but she didnt wanted 2.

Answer 11

hi i agree with you ,you look after your own first xx

Answer 12

I do agree with you.  I could care less that Angelia and Brad adopt kids.  There are millions of people that do it every year.  It is for the media attention and i guess if they do it in other counties it gets world news.  I know that sometimes it is easier to get a baby overseas however with there money the US would be just as easy.

God Bless you for being a foster parent.  The world needs more people like you.

Best Wishes to you and your family.

Answer 13

I'm not a fan of Angelina Jolie.  Having said that....the poor in Africa are in much greater need than the poor in this country.  Poor people in this country usually have food to eat and a place to sleep (even if it's just a homeless shelter).  Kids in Africa are dying of starvation, have no health care, and sometimes have to fend for themselves at unbelievably young ages.

And while I understand the idea of helping your neighbors first - people in other countries are just as important as people in our own country.

Answer 14

Many people choose to adopt from foreign countries rather than domestically because domestic adoptions have a much higher rate of falling through and/or being challenged later on down the line.  Many families try to adopt domestically and after many failed attempts choose to adopt a foreign child. The problem with domestic adoptions is that often the birth mother pulls out at the last minute OR even after the child is born and has been placed with the adoptive family! Moreover, many families have adopted domestically only to find years later that they are in a bitter custody battle with a birth parent or other biological family member. This does not happen with foreign adoptions. Most people who adopt over seas do not want to run the risk of having their hearts broken with failed adoptions or worse having their child taken away from them by the court system after they have been raising the child for years. I dont blame Angelina and Brad or anyone else for that matter to choose a safer route. Besides, children in the foster care system in the united states may not have it great, but they certainly have it better than orphanes in third world countries, who often do not even have access to simple things like clean water, food, adequate clothing, and medical care.

Answer 15

I have often thought about that, too.  I think that it is for publicity.  It makes them LOOK good.  Everybody gets so wrapped up in how WONDERFUL it is for Brad and Angelina to give these underprivileged kids from third world countries a chance at knowing the American dream.  Think about it, with the amount of $ they have at their disposal, they can hire enough live in nannies to assure that they NEVER have to lose a nights sleep due to a crying baby.  They can hire enough housekeepers to make sure that they NEVER have to polish the fingerprints off of a single mirror, and enough cooks to be sure that they never have to spread peanut butter on bread.  I think they just like all the publicity that their adoptions get for them. I guess it doesn't seem quite so "fabulous and chic" to adopt your needy child from the hills of Kentucky or West Virginia when you can adopt a RAINBOW of nationalities from around the globe!  Maybe I am wrong, if so, well---it ain't the first time and surely won't be the last.

Answer 16

well your right about that, but thats not the worst problem, the problem is that medication doesnt help sometimes to cover up the pain of what there feeling inside and out

Answer 17

I don't see why they can't adopt children from where ever they want.  Try to think globally instead of just nationally.  Kids in need are in need no matter where they are from.  I don't see the problem.

Answer 18

It is the in thing for bleeding heart liberals. They care more about foreigners then the people at home.

Plus, I am sure it the big thing in Hollywood these days, because they all are freaks.

Answer 19

I agree with you, This is a good question becasue they should help these children first before getting on a plane and adopting all different children.  It is great that they are helping other countries however, what about the children here that needs help.  Madonna is starting to do the same thing...

Answer 20

there easier to adopt there and they don't have to worry about the parents coming back because they want there kids to have a better life. more importantly why do you care?

Answer 21

well children here are in a lot better conditions than children over seas in most third world countries.  Granted the conditions are not ideal here, but at least the children in foster care attend school and are fed, most children overseas live in dirty, rundown orphanages, with little to no food, no medical care, no nutrition, some babies live all day long in their cribs, they never have human interaction or even get out to learn to walk and crawl.  They dont have diapers or if they do, they are never changed, they don't get bathes.  I could go on and on.  So yes, there are children everywhere that need homes, but if you go by true needs, these poor babies in third world countries, need homes more ( if you can put children on a priority list) than children here in foster care.  My husband was adopted from Korea at age 4 and he was dumped in a garbage can to die and lived in a horrid orphanage for a while.

Answer 22

I cannot speak on the behalf of Angelina Jolie or Brad Pitt but I do know that the adoption process here in the US is 'difficult' at the very least.  For some parents it can be impossible if you do not find the right agency.  It's much easier and [I hate to say it..] cheaper to adopt internationally.

Also, depending on how a person looks at it--the children in other countries who die daily from curable illness and starvation maybe considered 'priority.'  While at the same time there are kids here who do need help.

It's too bad so many people say "...so many people already adopt, I don't need to."  This is not true.  We should all as a nation and worldwide care for these kids in any little way we can.  Although, scams are too easy to come buy and the world is just to corrupt to trust anyone.  Ugg.  It seems like a loosing battle.  I guess what I originally wanted to say was it all depends on how you look at it!

Answer 23

I totally understand as well.  I do also know there are many people in our own country who need peoples help then those from other countries.  I do feel though that people when we help other people, we are always helping ourselves, because we are all one in Christ, but I do understand exactly what you are saying and know where you are coming from.

It reminds me of my church because they will go out and instead of reaching out to the lost people in our own town, they rather go to another state and do a mission project, etc.  Although its not wrong, I dont feel its the best we can do. And I think you  are feeling almost the same way about the adoption process...

Answer 24

I understand the opinions from each side.  But, I think what we need to ask ourselves is if one life is more worthy than another?  Every adoptive parent needs to adopt a child that they feel most comfortable with.  No one should ever adopt from foster care here in the U.S. just because they think they'd be "saving a life."  Many children in foster care have issues that not all of us are equipped mentally and emotionally to deal with.

Also, for some reason, many people think it's easier to adopt from another country, but that's simply not true.  When adoptiong internationally, not only do potential adoptive parents have to meet criteria set forth by their own state but they have to meet the criteria set forth by the country they'll be adopting from as well.

We adopted two babies from birth from right here in the U.S. through an agency and both adoptions together cost less than what one international adoption would have been.

Answer 25

Well i have to sympathise with you but...... a lot of familys feel the further i am from birth-familys the safer i am from loosing my child, somtimes its harder to understand other peoples reasons.

Answer 26

I dont think it should matter where the child lives, a kid is a kid. You wouldnt say "why adopt from California when you can adopt from Connecticut" or "why adopt from Miami when you can adopt from Orlando" right? So whats the difference between New York and China? We're all humans, and we all live on earth, so it doesnt matter where the child is from, what part of earth, if they need help then they need help.

Answer 27

I think some people are drawn to the drama of adopting a child in a Third World country.  Let's face it -- those little ones would likely have NO future if not for adoption.  And some folks like the idea (even if they don't know it!) of being looked at as a philanthropist for adopting (rather than just a parent).  Another reason is that some parents want an infant or toddler and are assuming that the wait is years in the U.S. for a young child/infant (not always true!).  And then, unfortunately, for some, it is a matter of race (although not for the Jolie/Pitts).  Some parents go all the way to (wherever) to adopt a light skinned child (who may suffer from alcohol exposure, malnutrition, or institutionlization) rather than looking into the adoption of a Hispanic or African American infant or toddler here in the U.S.  And also, for some it is about age.  Sadly, most of the children in U.S. foster care, at least, are beyond school age.  And with those years, also come years of hardship beyond belief in some cases.  And that requires experience, resources, and committment beyond many parents abilities.

Answer 28

I don't know if it's right or wrong, but I think they are giving children a chance in life that they would never have otherwise.  I don't mean being rich and priveledged, but that they may actually live.  The kids that they adopt come from such horrible places.  The people in some of these places work for pennies a day.  They are the children you see on tv being served soupy rice from a bucket.  There are children here that need homes, but at least in this country it doesn't matter where you come from, anyone can build the life they want if they work hard enough.  Again, I'm not saying it's right or wrong or that one is more deserving than the other.  That's just my theory.

Answer 29

Well-most other countries are much poorer than here.

The children  need more help.

Answer 30

i think angelina jolie is like a crazy cat lady....but with children from other countries. she is obviously doing it cos she wants the attention and not nessesarily for the children. it's like...i'll take one of these, and one of these....

anyway, i think we need to take care of our own first.

Answer 31

Celebrities want a child that will truely love them for what they are and not what they do...America is so star struck and greedy when it comes to most kids that celebrities don't want that. They want a child that will truely appreciate what they have.  

It might be one point of view that celebrities have.