This is for adoptive moms? Do you wait to buy Baby Items until you bring the baby home?

Question

Do you think it is better to wait and have baby shower, buy clothing etc until you have brought the baby home since the birth mother has so many hours after delivery to change her mind?

Answer 1

So very many things can happen -Yes I think I would wait

you will know the size and weight

of your child and OH -how much fun to have your little one there with you for everyone to fuss over !

Answer 2

If you go through a reputable agency or attorney, the likelihood of her changing her mind is relatively low.  They do exhaustive checks and interviews to get a feeling for how committed the birth mom is.  Many won't place a baby unless they are confident that she will go through with it.  Some will wait until she has signed over rights if they feel there is a possibility she will change her mind.

Bottom line...buy the stuff!  At the very least, make a baby registry.  It actually adds to the excitement.

Answer 3

I didn't. I did not have the baby shower til 2 months after I brought the baby home but I did buy diapers, wipes and formula and some clothes and blankets to have on hand for when I brought the baby home. Also I had a baby bed that converts to a toddler bed. I think you would want to have a few things ready. Yes, I know they change their minds. The first 2 birth mothers that choose me did. But the 3rd one didn't and I was left scrambling to have things ready. I could enjoy my bundle of joy

Answer 4

I was doing foster to adopt so I actually bought EVERYTHING for the baby 1 year before I got him.  I knew it was gonna be a boy becuase that is what I had requested so his little room was set up and waiting for him to come to.

Answer 5

We bought a bunch of the necessities (crib, dresser, diapers, few sleepers, few blankets, onesies, bottles, etc).  I didn't buy a bunch of gender specific stuff ahead of time because I didn't want to have to take it back if something happened to this adoption.  We even decorated our nursery (we picked out a boy bedding set and a girl bedding set and painted the walls a color that would match either set).  We didn't buy the bedding until we brought him home.  That's the wonderful thing about adoption, though, you know that you will end up with a baby in the end- maybe not the first one or the second one, but eventually you will be a parent. You're going to need all the basics eventually, so why not be as prepared as you can.  As far as a baby shower, we waited until we got home with our son and then we had 3 showers- the first one when he was about 3 weeks old.  This was a safe time for people to spoil our son and also a chance for everyone to meet him.  Be as prepared as you can, but don't set yourself up for disappointment by buying too much blue or pink.

Answer 6

We bought it ALL.we're weren't actually looking to adopt, but when we (us and the birth fam.) decided that we were going to adopt him I bought a years worth of clothes and we already had the crib and stuff from my then 1 year old daughter. The only thing I ran into wan he ended up being a preemie and weighed 3 lbs. he was in 0-3 mos. at 8 monthe old and All the clothes I had were in the wrong season because he just wouldn't grow.

Funny though, He's still tiny and he was able to wear the clothes intended for last summer, this summer and they fit perfect. Also we got a ton of preemie clothe from a couple at church who had preemie twins so it worked out

Answer 7

better that way, less pain if rejected.

Answer 8

We got some things ahead but kept them in the attic so we didn't have an empty nursery (crib, carseat). We matched 2 weeks before the birth and bought the bare minimum, two outfits, some diapers, wipes, bottles, blankets. Although we knew we were matched with a girl, I bought generic clothes in case this fell though and we later ended up with a boy. We bought a few more things (formula etc) the day she was coming home from the hospital with us, just before the bmom signed the papers.

We had a baby shower the day she turned a month old, and got lots of gifts, but most important got to share her with our friends.