This is my life..what do you think?

Question

I am really passionate about acting. I love it and there is nothing in the world I love as much as acting. And I want to be a professional actress.(like doing movies and shows) But my parents have a different idea.. they want me to be a doctor. And I don't want to live this. All the rest of my family has professions like this. I am the odd one out. And no matter how much I try they don't get it. He dosn't want to listen to me. My mom will definatly not listen to me. The hates the theater and acting business. My sister is spoiled brat she gets everything and even if she did something they find a way to blam it on me. If my sister wanted to act they would easily agree to it but not for me. They try to discourage me as much as possible at everything I do. I am scared to talk to them about anything. I cry at night. I feel like there is no reason to live. I want to act but no one understands. Someone please comment..

Answer 1

By the time you are ready for college you will be 18 and able to handle your own destiny. Unfortunately it is possible your parents will not pay for you to study theater in college so you will have to declare biology as your field at first. Do not worry. I have an idea I will explain below.

There is lots of reason to live. The world needs you. Without you there would be an empty hole and some things the world needs we would have to do without because you are the only one with the mission to do them.

Of course you want your parents approval and it is so hard when you do not have it. I lived that too. My parents were both teachers and I wanted to be a writer -- preferably a playwright from the time I was 8 years old when I wrote my first (short) play. When I was 11 I wrote a play at school and the teacher liked it so much the entire fifth grade put it on as a production and then the local children`s theater produced it.

My mom was my champion -- she sent out typed copies of my poems to relatives and friends all over the country.  But she died when I was sixteen and my father -- worried about having to support me much longer -- tried to railroad me into teaching because he and my mom were teachers. And many of my relatives informed me that writing was not a real career and disapproved of everything I said about writing claiming I would eventually give up and be an English teacher. I have no talent in teaching. I hate it. They didn`t care. It hurt me and messed me up such that I am now 36. My dad has been gone for eight years. And I am only now coming into my own as a playwright. So I get how painful the disapproval and discouragement can be. But never give up. Of course it is a little humiliating being a beginning playwright who is not young. But the field for women playwrights has been so restricted in the past I still have hope to be an innovator and make a difference. :-D

Back to you -- it may be that once you are eighteen and off to college they will not be as controlling as they may be now. Maybe it seems like they will ride herd over your class choices in college but if you go somewhere far away maybe they will not do so. Start out declaring biology but minoring in theater. If your mother says no. no. no. Say that theater classes might give you confidence to present at a medical conference one day. Tee hee.

Your first year you will mostly be taking the core classes everyone takes anyway. For now if you can and are fairly academic -- see if you can test out of the basic English / History/Math/ Foreign language classes but get credit for them with CLEP or AP testing or co-curricular classes with a local community college.

Getting as much of your freshman year out of the way as possible before college will give you more time to take electives -- theater classes -- and your parents will not have much to say about your academic progress.

I know taking AP or college level classes in 11th and 12th grade while trying to audition for and be in plays in the school and/or community and also simply being in high school is a huge amount on your plate.

But a) it will help you implement your plan to slowly move to studying theater in college; and b) it will get you out of the house more and independent from your demanding family.

For any core classes in the arts or humanities take acting and other theater classes. Build up a rapport with an instructor in the theater department who encourages you then move by your sophomore year to a double maor. Third year get more into the theater classes and graduate with a degree in theater minor in biology (since you will have taken all those bio classes second-third year anyway).  

After that you will be a young woman in your twenties and on your own. If you have to live frugally while you get your start -- so be it.

For now for some daily dreaming and encouragement:

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If you have some $$$ you can also subscribe to the digital edition of the magazine. You might as well start now being part of the industry.

I believe in you and I can sense you do trust your talent and are willing to work hard.

Answer 2

Bubblybu, this sounds as if I wrote it when I was a kid!!

I know exactly what you mean, and I went through the same hardships when I was young. I was a straight A student, and my mother wanted me to do law or medicine. I wanted to Act.

And so I did, I went to drama school, I trained hard. I took every opportunity, and gained experience. At first she didn't support me, and I felt sad that she wouldn't come see my shows. But now I've been an actor almost ten years, and she even asks me to tell her how my auditions go, and how my rehearsals are coming along. It took time for her to accept that this wasn't a 'phase', and once she understood this was my passion, and the only thing I could see doing for life, she came around.

Acting is a lonely proffesion at times, and a bloody hard one too! Success as a doctor or lawyer is much easier and concrete. You're guaranteed a job, and success comes with hard work. With acting, the learning never ends, success is not guaranteed even when you slave your **** off! But if it's in your soul, in your blood, you will feel a happiness that nothing else can bring.

So many people give up on their dreams. Don't be one of them. If you want to act because you want to act, not for fame or money (although that would be nice!), then do it. Actors are the storytellers of the world, the people who reflect society back to the world, and communicate what others won't or don't know how. We are musicians of the soul.

You don't mention how old you are. I'm 24, and I went to my first  drama school at 16, and another at 18. Finish highschool, get good marks, audition for some good drama institutions, get training, and an agent. Be like a sponge, absorb it all.

Actors are often not respected. In fact, acting was baned and punishable by death at some points in history! Nothing worth having is easy to get

Good luck, be strong.

Answer 3

Uhhhh... i HATE those kind of parents!!! YOU want to be an actress and there like " NO, your going to to be a doctor "

i share the dream, and my parents support me in it  ........   [[because neither got to live their dream ]] but what i say is:

yah, they are your parents, but its YOUR LIFE.... if they want you to become a doctor, then too bad. yah, you may want that in the future, but right now,  you want to ACT...sit down and talk to them. let them know this is your DREAM. Get ANGRY, tell them that you dont want to be a friggin doctor, and if you Do become one, its on your OWN will. but if you were forced by your parents, more people would die than if you WERENT one cause you wouldnt enjoy your job.....

a job should be something you want to do, not what your parents want YOU to do....

hello.... this isint the medieval times, its the 21st century, and guess what?

** Suprise Suprise **

people get to choose how they want to spend their lives!!!

o.m.g what a concept.....

your parents can step in when [[ and if ]] your pumping gas at costco, making minumim wage, living in a one bedroom apt, a highschool dropout.....

which, is why I say, go get a college education JUST IN CASE things dont work out....

but controll your life

but dont just be a rebel or something, you need your parents dont get me wrong..... just contorll your future.......

Answer 4

What do you want to be an actress for? But if you really want to be an actress, then just don't bring up the topic, wait till you finish high school, then go to acting school, your parents won't be able to do anything about it, or you can threaten them by saying you won't provide for them in their time of need, seriously it will work.

Answer 5

Oh my goodness!!! This sounds like my life except I have a younger brother.  I want to be an actress too, but whenever I bring the topic up, my parents and other elders, quickly shoot it down.  Just like yours they don't really understand my dreams.  I feel like I keep having to tell this lie, like, "I want to be doctor, ok!", just to get them off my back.  But in the realm of things, I truly want to star in movies and television because I know I have what it takes.  Girl I FEEL YA! lol

Answer 6

Your parents might say that because you are still young.. and don't think that they love your little sister more because they act this way with you.. that just means they have higher hopes for you and love you very much.. it's always harder for the elder kids.. but  you should just stop arguing with your parents about this, it isn't going to change anything.. just wait until you're old enough to persue your dream.. your parents will come around to it eventually when they will see that you are thinking maturally and that it is indeed your dream.. right now they might think it's just a childish phase that will pass, they probably think that you've seen 2 many movies and seen how obsessed people are with stars and that you're just going into it for the fame and nothing else.. but if you will stick with your dreams until you're old enough to make your decisions.. i'm sure your parents will respect that. So you should stop feeling so horrible and crying about this, because i'm sure everything will work out for you if you stick to your goals.. i'm looking forward to seeing you on tv =]