This is my very first short story. i need your honest opinion...?

Question

the plot? uh... it was a spur of the moment thing. :)

StillThinkingOfATitle

Useless. Nothing's changed, as always. All my efforts go to waste. I absolutely hate to admit it but that darn man is right. He didn't breathe a word about it but his eyes never lie. It's been 2 years since his annoying orbs first told me, "you're no good at math." I just ignored him. I'm neither good nor bad at his wretched subject. I understand fairly well those stupid formulas he filled the board with. And I'm fine with my sole inclination - languages. I used to be very proud before he did that. I loathe that moment - every tiny detail of it, every split second his eyes taunted me as he was handing back my test paper. I wanted to tell him to stop but I just flashed a silly grin and sat back down on my chair. I stared at the cruel, red mark for a moment. and then, I carried on hating him. I didn't really notice it that time, though.

Answer 1

It's pretty good. My only advice is to read back through the story and make sure it makes sense. Don't use a past tense and then a present tense one sentence after another. It makes it sound out of place. Don't try so hard to make it sound "intelligent", it only makes it look like you're trying too hard and some words tend to look out of place. Sometimes simple works better. Extra words here and there can make it harder to read or understand rather than interesting & educated. Keep up the great work though! kudos!!

Answer 2

Very well written.

Answer 3

You did a wonderful job with this story! Have a great day!