Those days when ya feel like giving up.?

Question

Now I know most will just say go see a doc or something which I never will...

But I have never been able to shake the feeling of giving up on life.

My very first memory's is from when I was 4, were I was sexily abused

by a now dead family member, my mother broke up with my farther when I was six were my only memory's of him is him trying to pack my bags as fast as he could to get rid of us, at the age of 10 a close friend of the family tried to sexily assault me and if it was not have been for my brother things would have been much worse. At the age of 13 my mother wouldn't even let me leave the house with out her coming with me, at age 18 I had no friends what so ever, at the age of 20 my mother had a complete mental break down and now is in a home, Now I live with my brother. I'm 22 and no matter what I seem to try everything just seems to end badly I feel lost at times, and I'm scared to end up like my mother, but also wish to experience at least some happiness in my life I have no happy memory's. I know this is a bad place to put my story but I really do feel lost, I have been trying to go back in to school which I left in year 9, but all that seems to go badly and I really don't know how to keep moving through each day.

Each day it seems I get more and more closed in my room and it's becoming harder to open my door.

Answer 1

Oh honey, I'm so sorry that you have had such a rough life. Nobody should have to go through that. You need to talk to somebody that you can trust and is going to help you through it. If its a family member, a freind, they will all hlp. If all other fails then yes dear i would have to say goand see a doctor. Good luck.

Answer 2

you should talk to your brother about it. maybe you and him should move somewhere else and restart your lives. I know how easy it is to just end it all, but you have to keep in mind those who love you and how would you feel if they did that to you.

Hang in there and i hope things get better for you  

Answer 3

i'm sorry honey. i know excactly how you feel.

i was adopted at 2 day's old. then at the age of 10, both of my parents died within three months of each other. i entered foster care where i was constantly abused sexually, physicly, and mentaly. that lasted for 8 years. then i left the system to get married at the age of 18. i had been dating the same guy for 4 yrs. after i moved in, i was guaranteed to go to the hospital at least once a week. he stabbed me, shot me, beat my head against the side of the bathtub, kicked me so hard that i now have stomach problems,etc. i left and finished high school homeless. i didn't have very many friends either but i made sure i counted on the ones i did have.

right now i am pregnant and was kicked out of my b/f house for getting that way. even though i had been taking birth control. when i found out i was pregnant i had to quit school b/c once again i was homeless. now i live at a care center for women who want they're children to be adopted. i realized taht even though i want my child, there is no way for me to be able to support it. and that makes me more depressed every day.

i know you don't want to talk to anybody but it really would help if you did. you don't have to see a doctor to talk. you can talk to your brother or talk to the church. you will be amazed how much people will want to help you there. and they won't judge you. people understand that bad things happen and people deal with them in different ways. go ahead and confide in your brother. he loves you and will understand.

i do hope you feel better. if you ever need someone to talk to just email me. i will be glad to help in any way.